Discipline for a 7 year old - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 09-17-2014, 02:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Discipline for a 7 year old

I've just started nannying for a rambunctious 7 year old boy, and I was wondering if someone could point me in the right direction to learn about gentle discipline. He's too big to carry, but to small to reason with, and the main thing that worries me is non compliance when it matters, like getting to school or putting on a helmet. If anyone could help me learn I'd so so so appreciate it!!
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#2 of 5 Old 09-18-2014, 09:18 AM
 
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He is not too small to reason with. Just beware of bogging down in excessive reasoning at times when you need immediate compliance. At those times, stick to a single firm sentence repeated as necessary ("It's time to go to school now.") and then later, when you have time, talk about the problem ("School starts at 8:10. We need to get there on time. Sometimes we see interesting things like that ant hill. It's frustrating to keep walking when we want to stop and look at things, but when we're going to school we need to keep moving.").

Great books for this age group are How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Parent Effectiveness Training.

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#3 of 5 Old 09-18-2014, 01:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by EnviroBecca View Post
He is not too small to reason with. Just beware of bogging down in excessive reasoning at times when you need immediate compliance. At those times, stick to a single firm sentence repeated as necessary ("It's time to go to school now.") and then later, when you have time, talk about the problem ("School starts at 8:10. We need to get there on time. Sometimes we see interesting things like that ant hill. It's frustrating to keep walking when we want to stop and look at things, but when we're going to school we need to keep moving.").

Great books for this age group are How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Parent Effectiveness Training.
Thank you so much!!! I will check those out.
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#4 of 5 Old 09-18-2014, 05:56 PM
 
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I also highly recommend the Kazdin Method, also a book. It is technically a book to solve discipline problems for particularly defiant children, but some of the basics will be helpful for any child. The method emphasizes positive reinforcement - making sure to notice and "reward" good behavior instead of focusing on the bad. One really small thing that helped us was the suggestion to phrase requests as "Please lace up your shoes." "Please put on your coat." etc. I find it strange that a simple change of phrasing was helpful, may be a coincidence, but it certainly can't hurt to try. And I agree - definitely not too small to reason with. I can reason with my 4 year old pretty successfully provided I catch her in the right mood.
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#5 of 5 Old 09-19-2014, 01:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I also highly recommend the Kazdin Method, also a book. It is technically a book to solve discipline problems for particularly defiant children, but some of the basics will be helpful for any child. The method emphasizes positive reinforcement - making sure to notice and "reward" good behavior instead of focusing on the bad. One really small thing that helped us was the suggestion to phrase requests as "Please lace up your shoes." "Please put on your coat." etc. I find it strange that a simple change of phrasing was helpful, may be a coincidence, but it certainly can't hurt to try. And I agree - definitely not too small to reason with. I can reason with my 4 year old pretty successfully provided I catch her in the right mood.
Thank you... that makes a lot of sense... I really appreciate this!! :
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