My GD has become a fun "game"... - Mothering Forums

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Old 07-27-2005, 04:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Soooo, my soon to be 18 mo has finally gotten tall enough to climb over the arms of our living room furniture. On the one big chair we have I don't mind, because he rolls the ottoman next to it and then just climbs over and back to his heart's content....

However, on the sofa I'd really rather he didn't, because there is nothing available for him to climb over onto (and the arms are fairly high), and between the arm of the sofa and the wall is our stereo, which we'd rather he didn't touch (and he's been unable to up until recently). Last week he was trying to vault over the arm of the sofa, so I got out my boring but matter of fact voice, picked him off the arm of the sofa and said something to the effect of, 'the chair is safer to do that on than the sofa', and took him over to the chair. I didn't raise my voice, gave him the alternative, etc. etc. However, this immediately turned into a game for him of "climb on the couch and fling myself towards the arm of the sofa, squealing, while mommy picks me up". We did this about 6 times, then I tried a change of scenery into a different room....came back about 15 min later and it started again. AND, it ends up happening every day since, at some point, while we are downstairs.

I have better luck sitting on the floor and keeping him off the couch altogether, but I don't really want to do that. If I sit on the couch next to the arm, he's fine, but if I get up to go to the bathroom, or go to check on dinner, or run upstairs to do something, he makes a bee line for it.

I'm very conflicted about this. Part of me thinks I just need to move the stereo to get rid of the inticement, but the other part of me feels like he should be able to start to learn this particular sofa arm is off limits. He knows the few other things we have that are off limits for safety reasons, but on this one the game of me removing him from the sofa (though I'm really making it as boring as I possibly can) apparently is too much fun.

So, if being boring and matter of fact is fun to him, what the heck am I supposed to do? I learned a long time ago with him the bigger deal I make out of him getting into things the spazzier he gets :LOL so that if he gets something I don't want him to have, I just casually make an observation, and he'll usually want to show me what he has, and it all works out. Unfortunately, with this couch situation, once he gets up on it, no matter how nonchalantly I look over at him, the second I move towards him he starts laughing hysterically because he knows the game is about to begin. AND, if I don't move towards him he still vaults over the arm, and has hurt himself twice doing this...

We are moving soon, and so we can configure our furniture differently to avoid this *particular* situation, but I was wondering if anyone had some words of wisdom for what to do, in general, if GD becomes a game? I know other "techniques" (yelling, etc.) would produce the desired "result", but that's not what I'm looking for; I know coming here to GD I'll be able to get some better ideas!

Heather, WAHM to DS (01/04)DD (06/06). Wed to DH(09/97)
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Old 07-27-2005, 04:24 PM
 
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Move the enticement. Way too young to expect limits to stick. The impluse control at this age is zero, even though they understand everything you say. I might suggest that you get a piece of fabric that you like and put it over the stereo. We have an ugly shirt over our DVR, VCR, etc. and when it is out of sight, it is out of mind.

As for his thinking this is a game--what a great momma you! He has no fear of you, trusts you completely, and could not conceive the idea that you would ever want something that did not make him happy. Good for you! Now you can use that playfulness to your advantage. Make a game of guiding his behavior. If you are really serious, don't go back and do it six times. The first time he goes for it, take him to a different room and engage in play.

Another idea would be to let him explore the stereo with you there. If he has the chance to check everything out, then the temptation may not be there. However, he still may have the temptation to play the 'come get me, mommy' game.

HTH
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Old 07-27-2005, 10:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by annab
I might suggest that you get a piece of fabric that you like and put it over the stereo. We have an ugly shirt over our DVR, VCR, etc. and when it is out of sight, it is out of mind.
Wow, see? I knew I'd get a good idea here. I'm definitely going to try this one, because similar things have worked for other situations....dunno why I didn't think of it - but again, that's why I come here!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by annab
If you are really serious, don't go back and do it six times.
Thanks for pointing this out, too - my usual M.O. is a 'one shot deal'. If I let him know it's time for a diaper change, or ask him to come with me out of x room or whatever, I'll request once and then facilitate with him (gently and pleasantly, while explaining to him), so I guess that's why this one was throwing me for a loop, because I felt like my facilitating wasn't getting anywhere, and making it actually worse...

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Originally Posted by annab
The first time he goes for it, take him to a different room and engage in play.
We spend the majority of our day upstairs while I'm working (then outside at lunch break time), and our "downstairs time" we get after I finish working in the afternoon is kind of a release for both of us, so I'd hate taking him back upstairs, but I totally see your point.

I feel so much better already about it. I think I got stuck in a certain frame of mind and just needed a little kick in the pants to snap out of it.

I think I'll:
1. Try covering it up with something, the out of sight out of mind will likely work with him at least until we pack it up to move in the next few weeks, and are able to rework our configuration.
2. If that doesn't work, try redirecting him on the other side of the room into another activity (I had just been taking him off the couch and trying to redirect him nearby).
3. If THAT doesn't work, then we'll go back upstairs where the temptation is nil....just would like to use that as my last option because we're up here all day and downstairs is bigger and more open.



Quote:
Originally Posted by annab
He has no fear of you, trusts you completely, and could not conceive the idea that you would ever want something that did not make him happy.
Thanks for this, I really needed to hear this this week!!

Heather, WAHM to DS (01/04)DD (06/06). Wed to DH(09/97)
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Old 07-27-2005, 10:22 PM
 
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Sounds like you've got some great ideas I would just add whatever you cover the stereo with...it likely needs to be dull and drab. Otherwise the covering itself will draw attention. And we thought letting dd gently explore the stereo would decrease the fascination...well she just learned hot to turn it on, change cd's, turn on the radio...etc. Purposefully. :LOL We eventually moved it up out of reach since she was damaging cd's.

Good luck
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Old 07-27-2005, 11:23 PM
 
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Originally Posted by babybugmama
Sounds like you've got some great ideas I would just add whatever you cover the stereo with...it likely needs to be dull and drab. Otherwise the covering itself will draw attention.
Good point! A fabric with cars, trucks, balls or balloons would never work here! :LOL
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