Is "good job" EVER a good thing to say? - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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#121 of 122 Old 08-07-2006, 11:12 PM
 
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deva33mommy i think i need to stalk your posts - i've been loving what you're saying not just in this thread but elsewhere, too

i'm sure good job can be used in a non-injurious way, and i certainly think it's unnatural to force yourself never to say it. i've said it or something like it occasionally when DS has really surprised me with being able to do something i didn't think he could.

what i see out and around though is total saturation levels of the phrase good job... i just don't think kids need to be praised for doing things they routinely do, or are routinely expected to do. and i would differentiate appreciation from praise - i routinely show my appreciation for DS doing what i want him to do... and i am grateful when everything goes smoothly... so he gets to see how happy it makes me.

as i think i mentioned in my previous post, our daycare is really over the top with g.j. related incidents involve:
-my DS recently getting a "certificate of appreciation" signed by his daycare workers... and this is at about 18 months... still in the infant room with a bunch of 6 month olds actually and no indication of what they are appreciating him for??
-we've been EC'ing at home for a long time, but i finally got up the nerve to ask daycare to take him potty. every time he goes in the potty they put a sticker on his daily sheet that the parents take home. what does a 19 month old who's been going potty almost all his life think about getting a sticker for the deed? i don't even show it to him, i don't think he would even get it.

Rosemary & Gary :
James 12/04 & Cecelia 4/07
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#122 of 122 Old 08-08-2006, 11:36 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Awww, thank you
I agree that forcing yourself to NOT say good job, when it feels like the right thing to say, is probably not helping anyone with anything. lol
Heck, when I tried to not say good job to dp, it felt really awkward and fake, and he KNEW what I was doing. kwim?

Becky, partner to Teague, SAHM to Keagan (7yo), Jonah (2yo)
 

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