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#61 of 166 Old 04-12-2006, 10:06 PM
 
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That's one more reason I believe it's so crucial that we offer our children the opportunity to experience childhood as an actual child, and not a tiny adult.

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#62 of 166 Old 04-12-2006, 10:13 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie
but they do get to see a daddy who unreservedly loves his little boy, a little boy who is so confident in his daddy's love that he can call out to him in a church-full of people.


What a beautiful model for your son of the love of God and of his relationship to the Divine as a beloved child of God. Your dh sounds like a wonderful father and pastor.

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#63 of 166 Old 04-12-2006, 10:18 PM
 
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Originally Posted by frenchie
Crying babies and restless children are a distraction to others trying to listen to the sermon.
"Out of the mouth of infants and nursing babes You have prepared praise for Yourself."

Psalm 8:1, quoted by Jesus in Matthew 21:16 and quoted by our priest the other day when my baby jabbered through the entire Eucharist.


I can't sit still through a 45 minute sermon. That's why I switched to an Episcopal church with 10-15 minute sermons. (Not really, but its an added perk.) We spend a lot of time sitting in the cry room. I've thought about having my name put on the door since I feel like its my personal cry room. Our three year old thinks that she is an acolyte and trys to participate. I admit that I'm embarassed but they just keep telling me that she's going to be a priest someday.
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#64 of 166 Old 04-12-2006, 10:26 PM
 
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Originally Posted by luv my 2 sweeties


What a beautiful model for your son of the love of God and of his relationship to the Divine as a beloved child of God. Your dh sounds like a wonderful father and pastor.
Eh, he's OK.

Seriously, I bet we could start a whole other thread on positive GD-friendly ideas for helping a small child get through church. My secret for toddlers? STICKERS and an itty bitty notebook. If you peel the backing away, it's a lot easier for little hands to get the stickers off (a practical tip for out of church as well)

And speaking of acolytes...my two-year-old LOVES to "blow out" the candles when the acolyte is snuffing them at the end of the service. This really keeps him quiet during this silent time in our service.

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#65 of 166 Old 04-12-2006, 11:55 PM
 
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Annettemarie, this would be a wonderful idea for a thread in Spirituality! We like to use Band-aids, in addition to the sticker repetoire. One of mine loves peeling and sticking bandaids

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#66 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 12:37 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Since I started this thread, can I end it too? She sat through the service tonight just fine. I don't expect her to be completely still or quiet all the time. She has had no spankings or any other form of punishment. She understands "shh" and "no" and complys with those requests. Our services aren't completely quiet since there are 18 babies 1 yr and younger there and numerous children older than that. I appreciate all the input- I really didn't think I'd get so much or that it would present such an area of controversy.

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#67 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 01:11 AM
 
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wow! 18 babies. that is so cool. It is a large church or just a lot of peolpe who dig kids?

The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it.  We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.

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#68 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 01:14 AM
 
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Mama2 '05'06, just wanted to tell you that i think you have the right idea. going consistantly to church is the best form of getting the children to learn how to stay still. if we miss one service it feels like we are starting all over the next week. also just expect that you will have to leave 1 or 2 times in the service to quiet her down. i still have to take our 3 yr old out sometimes when she refuses to stop chatting. its never easy and at parents of little ones we dont always get a lot out of the service but hey at least we are there and thats what counts!!!

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#69 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 10:14 AM
 
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#70 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 11:26 AM
 
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Originally Posted by indie
"Out of the mouth of infants and nursing babes You have prepared praise for Yourself."

Psalm 8:1, quoted by Jesus in Matthew 21:16 and quoted by our priest the other day when my baby jabbered through the entire Eucharist.


I can't sit still through a 45 minute sermon. That's why I switched to an Episcopal church with 10-15 minute sermons. (Not really, but its an added perk.) We spend a lot of time sitting in the cry room. I've thought about having my name put on the door since I feel like its my personal cry room. Our three year old thinks that she is an acolyte and trys to participate. I admit that I'm embarassed but they just keep telling me that she's going to be a priest someday.
I think maybe I'm not being understood...so I'll give an example. I used to go to a church without a nursery for the children. I *loved* (and still do) seeing babies and little ones in the church pews....I believe family worship should be encouraged in churches, but alas, so many completely discourage it. What I found frustrating at the old church we went to, was the parents who would just sit in the pew while their infant bawled, and when it became obvious that people were distracted, the momma would stand right on the other side of the door where the cry was just slightly muffled. Or the couple with the adorable 3 year old that would run back and forth on the church pew, clump clump clump...weeeeee!!...I swear, every sunday they sat in the pew right in front of us, no matter where we sat. We eventually left the church for many reasons, the distractions being one of them. I'm not a bitter old child hater (obviously)....I just like to listen to the sermon without *constant* distractions, and I don't believe for one minute that that is an unreasonable expectation when attending church. I love hearing a squeaky little voice of a 2 year old...or "shout out" from an infant....I love seeing kids in the sanctuary. I just think that there is a time and a place for child play, tantrums, squaking and whatnot...and the church sanctuary during a Sunday service is not it.
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#71 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 11:41 AM
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I would prefer some child noise with said children feeling the love of Jesus than children who have been negatively reinforced to be kept quiet who associate their pain with Jesus.

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#72 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 12:05 PM
 
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Originally Posted by frenchie
I just like to listen to the sermon without *constant* distractions, and I don't believe for one minute that that is an unreasonable expectation when attending church. I love hearing a squeaky little voice of a 2 year old...or "shout out" from an infant....I love seeing kids in the sanctuary. I just think that there is a time and a place for child play, tantrums, squaking and whatnot...and the church sanctuary during a Sunday service is not it.
I guess I'm not understanding you, because I would never put tantruming and playing in the same category. I'm not sure what "squaking" is; maybe Lutheran kids don't do it. If my child was running around or having a crying jag, I would of course take them out, because obviously they aren't happy. I don't feel that I have any sort of God-given right to enjoy a sermon distraction-free, especially as a mother. If one truly believes that children are a blessing from the Lord, then it naturally follows that ones main occupation when they are tiny little would be meeting their needs. If my child was running wild, I would take them out not because they were being naughty (who, after all, is church for, if not for the naughty!) but because they were having trouble participating in the service. It's not that I wouldn't encourage them to sit and be still--I would--but I wouldn't assume that they could or should do it just because I want them to.

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#73 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 12:12 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Mama2 '05'06
She has had no spankings or any other form of punishment. She understands "shh" and "no" and complys with those requests.
Here's the thing. You said:
Quote:
Finally gave her to daddy and he took her out and spoke sternly to her to sit still and be quiet. Came back in and she sat for the last 10 minutes. Then, the evening service, she threw the toys even when I said "no" and then started crying when I didn't give the toy back to her. I took her out and scolded her for throwing the toy and bawling- she bawled louder and wouldn't stop.
I'm saying this with all gentleness and love, but you are punishing her and she obviously is not complying with your requests. I think you need to ask yourself what your sweet little girl is trying to tell you. It sounds like she's saying "Mama, this is too much to ask of me." It sounds like she's also saying that she doesn't understand why you won't give her her toys or why you're speaking sternly to her and scolding her. And to scold a baby for crying? How confusing that must be to her. She has no other way of telling you she's upset! God does not parent us by scolding us when we come crying to Him. I think we should be extending the same grace and mercy to His littlest ones.

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#74 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 12:36 PM
 
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Originally Posted by frenchie
I think maybe I'm not being understood...so I'll give an example. I used to go to a church without a nursery for the children. I *loved* (and still do) seeing babies and little ones in the church pews....I believe family worship should be encouraged in churches, but alas, so many completely discourage it. What I found frustrating at the old church we went to, was the parents who would just sit in the pew while their infant bawled, and when it became obvious that people were distracted, the momma would stand right on the other side of the door where the cry was just slightly muffled. Or the couple with the adorable 3 year old that would run back and forth on the church pew, clump clump clump...weeeeee!!...I swear, every sunday they sat in the pew right in front of us, no matter where we sat. We eventually left the church for many reasons, the distractions being one of them. I'm not a bitter old child hater (obviously)....I just like to listen to the sermon without *constant* distractions, and I don't believe for one minute that that is an unreasonable expectation when attending church. I love hearing a squeaky little voice of a 2 year old...or "shout out" from an infant....I love seeing kids in the sanctuary. I just think that there is a time and a place for child play, tantrums, squaking and whatnot...and the church sanctuary during a Sunday service is not it.
I think this is more an issue with parents, rather than the children. The kids are just being kids, but the parents should know better. I've taken all three of mine to church since they were infants. When the babies cry, I take them out and walk them until they calm down. Or breastfeed them. If they are too wild, I take them out. Not for punishment, but out of respect for the other people in church. There's a difference between a normally playing child and one who needs a few minutes of a break and a short walk.
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#75 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 12:39 PM
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I'm a bit discouraged to see intolerent expressions here.

The "Baby understands no and quiet," sounds like the Ezzos or Pearls. I wonder how deeply punitive mentalities have seeped into the core of many Christian people.

Children are part of the Body. Would it be right to complain about the old man hacking and coughing in church? Or the one who sings out of tune? What's next?

I wouldn't subject the entire congregation to a tantruming child, but if my baby made a happy, squeaky noise while playing in the sanctuary, no one would or should mind.

I don't understand the baby understands no and quiet. There are many levels of understanding. She may understand the concept, somewhat, but she is wired to explore and make noise. If she never tried things out and investigated, she would be retarded. Literally, If she didn't articulate sound, she would never learn how to talk. Forcing a child to go against her nature stunts her development. It robs the child of energy she needs in other arenas.

Expecting a child to sit and be quiet when they haven't even celebrated their first birthday is not appropriate from a developmental perspective.

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#76 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 12:59 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie
Here's the thing. You said:

I'm saying this with all gentleness and love, but you are punishing her and she obviously is not complying with your requests. I think you need to ask yourself what your sweet little girl is trying to tell you. It sounds like she's saying "Mama, this is too much to ask of me." It sounds like she's also saying that she doesn't understand why you won't give her her toys or why you're speaking sternly to her and scolding her. And to scold a baby for crying? How confusing that must be to her. She has no other way of telling you she's upset! God does not parent us by scolding us when we come crying to Him. I think we should be extending the same grace and mercy to His littlest ones.
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#77 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 01:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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wow! 18 babies. that is so cool. It is a large church or just a lot of peolpe who dig kids?
Counting the babies- there are only 350 people approx. Most families have at least two kids some have 5 or more. (I have 8 siblings.)

I'm saying this with all gentleness and love, but you are punishing her and she obviously is not complying with your requests. I think you need to ask yourself what your sweet little girl is trying to tell you. It sounds like she's saying "Mama, this is too much to ask of me." [/QUOTE]

To me punishing is not saying "no" or being stern with her. Punishing would be hitting or isolating her. Punishing to me is what I grew up with - being spanked for any and every offense from the time I was 4 months old,being screamed at and humiliated. Frowning and saying "no" in a stern voice isn't punishment it's direction. I think that NOT teaching a child "no" would be wrong and unloving. If we don't say it now, how will we ever say it? When they are hitting the parents or siblings? Maybe when they are reaching for the hot stove or grill or fireplace? After they've been seriously injured in an incident that could have been prevented by them obeying "no"? I understand that sometimes she can't do what I ask her to do and then we change what I expect. I don't give her back the toys she throws while we're driving b/c then I'd never get anywhere or get anything done stopping every 2 min to pick up what she has thrown down when she wants it back. I will give her something different to play with instead. I agree that telling her "no, shh" (scolding complete) for crying isn't the best way to deal with it. I will try to figure out what she is trying to say rather than telling her to be quiet.

God may not scold us when we come crying to Him but we often have to live with the consequences of our mistakes. Crying isn't going to remove them. Maybe she is too young to understand that now but eventually she will have to learn that actions have consequences.

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#78 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 01:57 PM
 
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If she doesn't learn her alphabet today, how is she going to learn?
If she doesn't learn how to drive tomorrow, when will she?
If she doesn't learn how to sleep by her self tonight, she never will.

See how silly that is?

She will learn when she NEEDS to. She doesn't need to be scolded and told no for being a normal baby. When you tell her no, and she cries like that, you are hurting her spirit. It is normal for her age to act the way she is. That's how babies are supposed to act. It saddens me to think of scolding a sweet young baby that has only been on this earth for 10 short months. Everything is still so new to her. She needs to be able to love to make noise and love to be a baby. Yelling at her for it isn't going to make her love it.

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#79 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 02:09 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Mama2 '05'06

God may not scold us when we come crying to Him but we often have to live with the consequences of our mistakes. Crying isn't going to remove them. Maybe she is too young to understand that now but eventually she will have to learn that actions have consequences.
But your baby isn't making a mistake when she cries, and the only consequence to that action should be loving and understanding and hugs and kisses by mama and daddy. Not frowning, or no-ing, or toy taking away.
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#80 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 02:19 PM
 
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God may not scold us when we come crying to Him but we often have to live with the consequences of our mistakes. Crying isn't going to remove them. Maybe she is too young to understand that now but eventually she will have to learn that actions have consequences.
whao!

crying is how she tells you something is wrong. it's the only communication she has. it is not a mistake.

that's your mistake.
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#81 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 02:44 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Mama2 '05'06
To me punishing is not saying "no" or being stern with her. Punishing would be hitting or isolating her. Punishing to me is what I grew up with - being spanked for any and every offense from the time I was 4 months old,being screamed at and humiliated. Frowning and saying "no" in a stern voice isn't punishment it's direction.
To you, perhaps it's not punishment. But to a tiny eleven month old baby who thinks the sun rises and sets on your love? It's punishment. It's withdrawal of affection.

Quote:
I think that NOT teaching a child "no" would be wrong and unloving. If we don't say it now, how will we ever say it? When they are hitting the parents or siblings? Maybe when they are reaching for the hot stove or grill or fireplace? After they've been seriously injured in an incident that could have been prevented by them obeying "no"?
I'm wondering who here said saying no is wrong? It's saying no "sternly" and "scolding" that I take issue with.

Quote:
I understand that sometimes she can't do what I ask her to do and then we change what I expect. I don't give her back the toys she throws while we're driving b/c then I'd never get anywhere or get anything done stopping every 2 min to pick up what she has thrown down when she wants it back.
In that case, of course you can't give her back her toys. Why don't you give them back in church? Because they way I read it, you were refusing to give them back to punish her for throwing them. There's no reason not to give her the toy (or you could be proactive and tether it as Lilyka suggested). But to simply not give them back to teach her a lesson in an already potentially volatile situation seems awfully punitive to me.
Quote:
I agree that telling her "no, shh" (scolding complete) for crying isn't the best way to deal with it. I will try to figure out what she is trying to say rather than telling her to be quiet.
That's great!
Quote:
God may not scold us when we come crying to Him but we often have to live with the consequences of our mistakes. Crying isn't going to remove them. Maybe she is too young to understand that now but eventually she will have to learn that actions have consequences.
She's eleven months old. Trust me, she has plenty of time. God meets us where we are. I think he expects us as mothers to do the same for our babies.

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#82 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 02:45 PM
 
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Originally Posted by DebraBaker
I
Children are part of the Body. Would it be right to complain about the old man hacking and coughing in church? Or the one who sings out of tune? What's next?
That is a most excellent point, DB!

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Originally Posted by frenchie
I think maybe I'm not being understood...so I'll give an example. I used to go to a church without a nursery for the children. I *loved* (and still do) seeing babies and little ones in the church pews....I believe family worship should be encouraged in churches, but alas, so many completely discourage it. What I found frustrating at the old church we went to, was the parents who would just sit in the pew while their infant bawled, and when it became obvious that people were distracted, the momma would stand right on the other side of the door where the cry was just slightly muffled. Or the couple with the adorable 3 year old that would run back and forth on the church pew, clump clump clump...weeeeee!!...I swear, every sunday they sat in the pew right in front of us, no matter where we sat. We eventually left the church for many reasons, the distractions being one of them. I'm not a bitter old child hater (obviously)....I just like to listen to the sermon without *constant* distractions, and I don't believe for one minute that that is an unreasonable expectation when attending church. I love hearing a squeaky little voice of a 2 year old...or "shout out" from an infant....I love seeing kids in the sanctuary. I just think that there is a time and a place for child play, tantrums, squaking and whatnot...and the church sanctuary during a Sunday service is not it.
Hey frenchie, I'm right there with you...but I think we're the only ones that understand what we're saying . I've just decided I have to agree to disagree with the majority on this board on this particular topic...it was the same when there was a "roaming in a restaurant" thread a long time ago...

And I LOVE kids.....LOVE them. Love their enthusiasm, their creativity, etc. And don't think they should be restricted from being anywhere JUST BECAUSE they are children, but at the same time, I do think that there is a time and place for everything, and I am conscious of how my DS's actions affect other people's enjoyment and appreciation of whatever it is (restaurant, church, what have you), especially if he's too young to be getting anything meaningful out of it anyway. So, I'm the one who keeps him home, until he's able to be a little more calm and respectful of the people around him. I understand that taking them frequently is one way of getting young chilren acclimated to situations that require a little more reserve, but so is waitign until you don't really have to teach them about it, waiting until they acquire it naturally.

Then again, as before, I'm more spiritual in my beliefs than feeling like I have to go to church every week, so this works for me. Everyone is different. Just wante dto let you know you're not alone, frenchie. It's hard to express how you can love children and everything that they are about, but not feel like it's always appropriate for their "everything" to be around all the time. Makes me look like a grinch, and I'm really, REALLY not.

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#84 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 03:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Kathryn
If she doesn't learn her alphabet today, how is she going to learn?
If she doesn't learn how to drive tomorrow, when will she?
If she doesn't learn how to sleep by her self tonight, she never will.

See how silly that is?

She will learn when she NEEDS to. She doesn't need to be scolded and told no for being a normal baby. When you tell her no, and she cries like that, you are hurting her spirit. It is normal for her age to act the way she is. That's how babies are supposed to act. It saddens me to think of scolding a sweet young baby that has only been on this earth for 10 short months. Everything is still so new to her. She needs to be able to love to make noise and love to be a baby. Yelling at her for it isn't going to make her love it.
I don't yell at her just so you know. Soft but firm words work better than yelling. I am not trying to get her to not be a baby or to not love making noise. One question- When IS the time to learn "no"? You say when she needs to but how does she know/I know when that time is? I see way too many kids running around, sassing off to their parents, and having screaming tantrums when they don't get what they want; screamimg and bawling b/c they are "communicating the only way they know" whenever I go to the store.: Many things are learned with time and learning "no" is too. It isn't an overnight thing- it takes time to learn and to understand and follow. I don't expect her to listen every time I say it b/c she's a baby. But she"ll hear it and gradually understand it and follow it.

"whao!

crying is how she tells you something is wrong. it's the only communication she has. it is not a mistake.

that's your mistake. "[QUOTE]
Today 10:09 AM

I'm not talking about a baby crying here- I am talking about an adult. I know that crying is her way of comminucating right now and I know that it isn't a mistake for her to cry- it's normal.

"In that case, of course you can't give her back her toys. Why don't you give them back in church? Because they way I read it, you were refusing to give them back to punish her for throwing them. There's no reason not to give her the toy (or you could be proactive and tether it as Lilyka suggested). But to simply not give them back to teach her a lesson in an already potentially volatile situation seems awfully punitive to me.
Quote:"


She has the tether on some of the toys but being pregnant and fat means I can't bend over to get the toys off the floor to give back so I don't try.

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#85 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 03:58 PM
 
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I see scolding a baby enough to make them cry and yelling as the same. :
The more you say no, the less affect it will actually have. I say "please stop", or I redirect and say "ooh! Lets play with this!". Saying NO to a child isn't going to stop them from having meltdowns in stores. I honestly think you are expecting way too much out of young children.

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#86 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 04:46 PM
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Mama2 '05'06,

I believe your childhood sounds very familiar to me.

I have had to break out of the punitive pattern (I'm still working on things,) I feel for you because this is very difficult.

I also want to be careful because I don't want you to feel picked on, but I believe a vestige of the old familiar punitive mindset could be at play here. Especially if you have family and church people putting some sort of pressure on you.

It takes a lot of really hard work, a lifetime of work, to pull the weeds of punitive philosophies out of your garden. The rewards are great, however, because whatever issues you address will not be there for your own children to overcome when they are adults trying to gently parent your grandchildren.

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#87 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 06:53 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by donosmommy04
Hey frenchie, I'm right there with you...but I think we're the only ones that understand what we're saying . I've just decided I have to agree to disagree with the majority on this board on this particular topic...it was the same when there was a "roaming in a restaurant" thread a long time ago...
I'm confused as to what we are agreeing to disagree to. No one here said children should be running around church beating drums.

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#88 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 07:00 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mama2 '05'06
One question- When IS the time to learn "no"? You say when she needs to but how does she know/I know when that time is? I see way too many kids running around, sassing off to their parents, and having screaming tantrums when they don't get what they want; screamimg and bawling b/c they are "communicating the only way they know" whenever I go to the store.: Many things are learned with time and learning "no" is too. It isn't an overnight thing- it takes time to learn and to understand and follow. I don't expect her to listen every time I say it b/c she's a baby. But she"ll hear it and gradually understand it and follow it.
I hear what you're saying, I really do. But if let fear guide your decisions in how you parent (fear of the future, or that she'll grow up bratty) rather that love, you're not doing yourself or your daughter any favors. Personally, I'm not a huge fan of "no". I lean towards distraction and redirection. No, especially to a small baby, draws a line in the sand. It's a real "do as I say OR ELSE" kind of word. Because if you say "no" because she "needs to learn," and she does it anyway, what happens then? It seems logical to me that you would have to them punish her so she does indeed learn that no means no, or let her go on with her baby ways, teaching her that no sometimes means less. Does that make sense? So if, instead of no, you use language like, "listen to pastor?' "here's your book!" and "can you find the candles?" you're only giving her a chance to succeed. If, in the grocery store, a mama pays attention to her children and says "can you show me your quiet voice?" "where are the apples?" or "let's look for things that are red!" the mother is gently guiding the child towards appropriate behavior without being punitive. It takes more time, but it is so, so worth it.

Quote:
She has the tether on some of the toys but being pregnant and fat means I can't bend over to get the toys off the floor to give back so I don't try.
That is tough, Mama, and I remember it well. God willing, I'll be reliving it soon. Maybe one of your in-laws or hubby could help you out by picking up a toy? Or, if you sling her, you could connect them with those plastic links to the sling ring? Or you could just have one or two toys tethered, and maybe some o's or other easy snack?

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#89 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 07:15 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by donosmommy04
Hey frenchie, I'm right there with you...but I think we're the only ones that understand what we're saying . I've just decided I have to agree to disagree with the majority on this board on this particular topic...it was the same when there was a "roaming in a restaurant" thread a long time ago...

And I LOVE kids.....LOVE them. Love their enthusiasm, their creativity, etc. And don't think they should be restricted from being anywhere JUST BECAUSE they are children, but at the same time, I do think that there is a time and place for everything, and I am conscious of how my DS's actions affect other people's enjoyment and appreciation of whatever it is (restaurant, church, what have you), especially if he's too young to be getting anything meaningful out of it anyway. So, I'm the one who keeps him home, until he's able to be a little more calm and respectful of the people around him. I understand that taking them frequently is one way of getting young chilren acclimated to situations that require a little more reserve, but so is waitign until you don't really have to teach them about it, waiting until they acquire it naturally.

Then again, as before, I'm more spiritual in my beliefs than feeling like I have to go to church every week, so this works for me. Everyone is different. Just wante dto let you know you're not alone, frenchie. It's hard to express how you can love children and everything that they are about, but not feel like it's always appropriate for their "everything" to be around all the time. Makes me look like a grinch, and I'm really, REALLY not.

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm bigining to feel like I don't fit in here at all.

Wintermommy...I know this is a parental issue...and that's my point!!! I understand that the children don't know any better, and can't be *expected* to sit through a sermon. However, I am hyper aware of people around me. *I* don't like to be distracted in church, therefore I don't like others to be distracted in church. As soon as my son was unable to sit through church without being a distraction to others, I took him to the nursery and stayed with him. My husband and I would switch Sundays now and again, but I almost always stayed with Kai...unless he he was OK with me leaving him in Sunday school class.

Annettemarie...does it really matter that I put playing and tantrums in the same sentence? My point is both are *distracting* in church. I'm not talking about coloring, reading a book, playing with a doll or anything like that. I think the example I gave was very clear....a child running back and forth in a pew is not only distracting, but inappropriate behavior in church during a sermon. It's not the kid I have a problem with, it's the parent. As for "squaking"...I call it squaking when a baby gets real loud....not coos and gurgles....I'm talking about screaming to hear their voice...it's cute, I love it, but I don't want to hear it during a church sermon....and I don't expect that anybody else does.

I go to a huge church. We have a school campus as well. There is a section of the campus that is used for an infant nursery, there is a nursing room as well. We have a play room for the young toddlers, a class room for the 2-3 year olds, and a huge child's ministry that goes up to Jr. High. ALL are welcome in the sanctuary for Sunday service.....most of the parents choose to put their children in an age appropriate classroom so their children will enjoy church.
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#90 of 166 Old 04-13-2006, 07:24 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by frenchie
Annettemarie...does it really matter that I put playing and tantrums in the same sentence? My point is both are *distracting* in church. I'm not talking about coloring, reading a book, playing with a doll or anything like that. I think the example I gave was very clear....a child running back and forth in a pew is not only distracting, but inappropriate behavior in church during a sermon. It's not the kid I have a problem with, it's the parent. As for "squaking"...I call it squaking when a baby gets real loud....not coos and gurgles....I'm talking about screaming to hear their voice...it's cute, I love it, but I don't want to hear it during a church sermon....and I don't expect that anybody else does.
Sorry. Didn't realize you were narrowly defining "playing" as "running around the church stomping on pews and distracting the congregation." I don't think there are many people here who would condone that as appropriate church behavior.

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