Join Date: Feb 2005
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Dh, Me , DD 10 , DD 7 , DD 4
We , , , , not in that order
Originally Posted by captain crunchy
If another child hit our dd and no one *did* anything, I would first see if dd was okay. (I always tend to the *victim* first, regardless of who's child did what) Then, I would deal with the other child myself in the same manner I deal with our daughter. I would try to see the underlying *need* for the hitting "I know you really wanted to play with that toy, it is frustrating to wait sometimes." Then I would gently explain alternatives and our daughter's boundaries ...."but Bailey doesn't like to be hit, she likes to be touched gently --- next time you feel frustrated/sad/angry/impatient (whatever it may be) would you please come get an adult to help?"
i would really try to communicate (through my actions) that my goal is to work with them and find an agreeable solution -- I would not try to intimidate or shame or anything like that.
Worst case scenario, I would direct dd to another area gently.
Homeschooling mom of 2 rambunctious, loving, spectacular boys, wife to an incredible man who has been my best friend on this journey <3
Originally Posted by blsilva
Actually, KristiMetz, I would love to see this reaction. Most of the parents I see either spank or yell at the kids, or do not respond at all- no talking, no instruction, nothing. Ds was hit one time at a gym program, and the other child's dad quite literally watched it without saying a word to his child, or to mine. I didn't know how to react, and ds was kind of shell-shocked. He had never been around kids before, and had never been hit before. He teared up a little, and I comforted him, then let him go back and play. Of course, he went right back to where the other child was, and got hit again. : I went up to ds, pulled him out, and told the other child- as mildly as I could, do not hit him- hitting hurts. Then I told ds that if it happened again, he should tell the kid not to hit him and leave.
As angry as I was, it was not at the child, it was at the parent. I did not really want to see this child spanked- something that I had seen before for the horrible crime of not participating in the class. But if the dad had done what you described- talked to his son, figured out what was going on, and helped him find another way, I would have felt a lot better, and I think that both of the children would have been better off for it.