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Toddler harnesses ('leashes')

8K views 189 replies 102 participants last post by  JeDeeLenae 
#1 ·
Just out of curiosity what do the rest of you AP moms think about the use of harness on a toddler? Is it appropriate? Is it inappropriate? Is it only appropriate in certain situations? Etc.
 
#52 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by LadyButler
While I don't use one regularly, I'm seriously considering getting one of the backpack versions for our upcoming vacation... For me, safety overrides any misgivings I have about using them.

I also don't have a problem with my SIL using them when she's out and about "alone" with her toddler twins.
: They're always heading in different directions- so unless she keeps them strapped in that aircraft carrier of a double stroller of hers, harnesses seem to be the best GD option. (She's pregnant with twins again and can't sling two toddlers at a time with the watermelon sized belly she's got now...)

OMG!! Hugs to your SIL!!!
 
#55 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by firstwomantomars
Great info on this thread - thanks!

Could someone point me to a picture or place to find/order the backpack kind? Is it on the adult or the child? I'm not sure I get it ...
: but it sounds interesting!!!

Thanks!!!
Well, I ordered mine from walmart.com
: And right after ours arrived our Walmart started carrying them in stock. They also have a monkey style. This is what we have:
http://www.walmart.com/catalog/produ...uct_id=4837494

But I do know there are other places online you can get one as well. Several of them were WAY out of our price range though. Hopefully someone else can help you out with other links. I seem to remember someone else at MDC also mentioning that they got their's at Target...

Holly
 
#56 ·
I used to think that they were awful. I thought it was so cruel to do that to your child. LOL Then I got older and had kids of my own. I have never used one, but I totally understand why they are used. I also see them as a safety tool for parents.
 
#57 ·
Hi mommas,
I'm not a mom yet but i do have fond memories of my harness and wrist leash from my hellion days. I NEVER wanted to hold hands or be held and i was a runner...lol still am. If my babies are anything like me I don't think i would hesitate using one in some form, it would spare me and my kids from the trauma my mom and I experienced when I got lost at Disneyworld at the ripe old age of 3
 
#58 ·
Personally I don't like the look of some of them: I was at the zoo with ds and dh a week ago and there was a little boy there, he was Amish and instead of a wrist one he was tied up in a thick leather tether!! It actually looked they were taking him for a walk! He had to be ds's age, 4.5...
: and I admit I did lift my eyebrows a little!

I never had a problem with ds running from me - he has very mild sensory issues and doesn't hold my hand but does hold onto one of my fingers and that's good enough for me. But that is US. If I had a runner I'd use one - the most unobtrusive one I could find. If his safety was compromised in any way I'd use it and not think twice and to heck with what people thought...I'm just glad I never had to!
 
#59 ·
i personally see nothing wrong with them if they are being used for safety. I can't expect a 2 or 3yr old to comprehend the severity or danger of someone kidnapping them etc, so if they were prone to running off, I would use one.

Quote:
Both girls definitely prefer this to the stroller or cart! It gives them the freedom to explore, and the opportunity for more exercise. It also gives me the peace of mind, to know that my children are safe.
i also agree with this comment, it gives the children some freedom while still being safe.
 
#60 ·
I just can't seem to overcome my negative reaction when I see one. The point about the harnesses not being all that different from strollers is a good one, though. You've definitely got me thinking!

On the other hand, I live in a busy urban neighborhood with LOTS of small children. Most mothers don't seem to use leashes, therefore, somehow most Moms/babies seem to do OK without them.

My feeling is usually the less gadgets, the better.
 
#61 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by smilla653
I just can't seem to overcome my negative reaction when I see one. The point about the harnesses not being all that different from strollers is a good one, though. You've definitely got me thinking!

On the other hand, I live in a busy urban neighborhood with LOTS of small children. Most mothers don't seem to use leashes, therefore, somehow most Moms/babies seem to do OK without them.

My feeling is usually the less gadgets, the better.
I used to live in a busy, urban neighborhood (and visit there periodically) and I can live without one. But my daughter (with me) is not too much of a runner. She will take off if DH is in charge because clearly, I am the muscle. I will buy one before we go to the state fair though. We have an Ergo and a stroller but DD will want to walk and explore and really, that is why we will take her.
 
#62 ·
I was just looking through the new sensational beginnings catalog, and in there they have these little radio frequency devices that clip to kids shoes and the parent has a remote, so you can locate them if they run off. I think they would be cool for an older child, but for ultimate safety for a toddler, I would use a leash.
 
#65 ·
For me, harness doesn't have any better connotation than leash
ITA with Yooper about the child needing to be okay with it and being used gently. I would think this would be a given though


Thanks, everyone for a civil discussion
 
#66 ·
I love putting ours on my 1 year old while going shopping, garage saling, once he's done being held, i can set him down and instead of being done looking, we can both look but with in a short distance of each other. Ours is a monkey backpack and he loves it and carries it even when he's not wearing it.
 
#68 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by heartmama
I see no reason for this issue to be divisive.

I think we can all agree that keeping our child safe is of utmost importance.

I personally did not use a harness. Other approaches worked for us.

But, I can easily admit that if other approaches did not work, and we had to go near potential dangers (water, traffic, crowded airport), I would do what I had to do in order to keep ds safe.
: Totally.

And - from the mothering higher order multiples tribe - I'd say that it is something that many of my peers use once the kiddos hit a certain age. I haven't tried it yet - but this is the first I've heard of the "back packs" - my kids love backpacks - so maybe this would work for us? They are starting to really struggle and fight the stroller - and I can't handle them alone on an outing . . .
 
#69 ·
So, is this the type of backpack y'all mean? Does the parent hold a child by the "tail"? That's much cuter than anything I've seen used around here
 
#71 ·
I have a toddler and a newborn, and I bought one of these backpacks for my toddler, so I don't have to be yanking on her arm all the time. I don't use the stroller much. We usually just walk into a store and then use the cart. (Most other outtings we have daddy to help carry babies.) The only problem I have had is teaching her not to run away from me. If I try to "rein her in", then sometimes it will cause her to fall. She seems to love the perceived freedom of not having to hold my hand. Any advice on how you actually use it/how the child gets use to the restraint?
 
#72 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Storm Bride
I bought a harness-style one for dd when I was pregnant with ds2. She's very active, and I was having a really hard time chasing her for about the last 5-6 weeks. I figured it was worth a try, if she liked it. She loved it. After having been bullied into another c-section, I also used it for the first month or so postpartum. Since then, she occasionally finds it and insists that I put it on her, then she usually holds her own "tail". I do'nt know why she decided it was a tail - it's not an animal harness or anything.

She loves it, and it certainly enabled me to do a lot more with her when ds2 was a newborn.
My dd also refers to it as a "tail." She loves her teddy & doggy backpack harnesses.
I carry my 11mos dd in a sling. 2 & 3/4 yo dd holds my hand. I slip the handle to her harness over my wrist - just in case she decides to wriggle away. I don't hold it like a leash.

Whenever we're out without the harness, she runs. Dd's favorite game to play in stores is hide-and-seek.

I haven't heard this safety gadget is controversial...
Many AP folks I've met have actually used slings for this purpose.
 
#73 ·
I'm going to get the monkey when my son is a few months older. Right now we just use a leash that attachs to his wrist and then to my hand. I think he'd be more distracted by the harness than he is by the little leash. He doesn't really mind it. He stops to kind of pick at it sometimes, like he does ANYTHING he ends up wearing, but mostly he just ignores it and keeps walking, feeling all free and independant lol
 
#74 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by BennyPai
My dd also refers to it as a "tail." She loves her teddy & doggy backpack harnesses.
I carry my 11mos dd in a sling. 2 & 3/4 yo dd holds my hand. I slip the handle to her harness over my wrist - just in case she decides to wriggle away. I don't hold it like a leash.

Ah, I see, so if you need to direct the child, you still need to hold her hand. But you could let go if you were just going to follow wherever she wanted to go. The few times we tried it, she always tried to go the opposite direction I wanted to go. Tried it in a store once - big mistake, she was grabbing everything off the shelves. I'm glad she's willing to ride in the cart! Plus her little legs got tired after awhile, and when I had an emergency run to the bathroom, I was practically dragging her.
 
#75 ·
I can see both sides of this, but personally, I wouldn't use one. If they were more widely used and socially acceptable, I would perhaps consider one. I live in Los Angeles, and I never really see people use them. Maybe a few times at the zoo or at Disneyland. Everyone has their child in strollers everywhere.

It just reminds me of a dog on a leash or bondage or something, but I have seen a few kids running from parents who probably wished they had a harness!

I am not comfortable bf my toddler in public either, so I guess I worry too much about public opinion!
 
#76 ·
Got 3 monkeys on order today. With toddler triplets who prefer to walk rather than stroll - and an active 4 year old in tow -- I hope this is a good solution for us. One that will give the babies the freedom that they want - while also keeping them safe.
 
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