...what do you do?
Here is the example. Today my daughter (8 year old)invited a friend over to do crafts. Dd and I had an agreement that her younger brother (5 year old) would be included and that the activities would be things he could do. When the friend arrived, she didn't want to do crafts and she acted a bit sneaky, finally persuading my daughter to go up to her room "to talk in private". Then they announced that ds wasn't welcome to participate in what they were doing so he started bugging them. I helped him find something to do, but whenever my attention strayed from him, he went back to bugging them. They were willing to have the younger brother around (he's 2 years old) so the middle child was jealous and angry. I tried to keep it light, but it was frustrating for me to have my daughter follow her friend instead of doing the thing she had agreed to do and that she knew was the right thing to do. After about half an hour, dd and friend said they wanted to go over to friend's house "just to get something". Dd phoned and asked if she could stay there for a playdate. I said yes, that she could stay for an hour, but I did it more because I didn't want to get in trouble with the other parents and I am hesitant to discipline this particular friend, who mostly gets to do whatever she wants and who looks at me like I have three heads when I say "no" to some plan.
When dd came home, we talked, and she agreed that she did the wrong thing, and agreed that play dates with this friend often cause trouble at our house, so we have put a moratorium on having the child over. I still feel like the problem isn't resolved, though.
Waht do you do when your child does something she knows is the wrong thing to do?