Hello everyone! This is my first post here, though I have looked here and read the wonderful advice everyone has given before.
This is my situation. I have two girls, 3 and 1. I feel so out of control lately, and so far from the kind of mom I want to be. It is a constant struggle between me and my older daughter. She will not do anything I ask her to, won't stop doing what I ask her to do, constantly hurts her little sister, etc. She has hit/stomped/pushed her sister since she was born. Now, the little one has started just walking up to her and hitting/pushing/pinching the older, because that's what always happened to her! I see my older daughter and I heading in the same direction that my own mother and I went in years ago, and I am so upset because I don't want that. I want to add though, my older daughter can sometimes be an absolute angel. She is so beautiful and amazingly smart and says the most brilliant things. She loves to play mommy and is so sweet when she does that I know I'm not completely messing up.
I will not spank. This isn't a new problem. We've tried time-outs, but it seems impossible to put her in time-out for each occurence, she'd be there all day! Any suggestions?
My parents have recently separated and I think the stress of that and thinking of my relationship with my parents is really weighing heavily on me right now.
Anyway, my point here wasn't necessarily to vent a few of my problems (sorry!) but to get some recommendations. Can anyone suggest books or other resources for gentle discipline for younger kids, or any other book that will keep me from mommy burnout?
When my one year old had just been born, I asked a different AP forum for help and was not given any advice other than that my older daughter wasn't hurting her on purpose, etc. I felt really bad after reading the responses because I was reaching out for help and felt like I got my hand slapped. From the other responses I've read, Iknow that won't happen here. Thanks so much!