I think I am one of the more coercive people on this board. I don't threaten or punish my daughter, but when I want her to do something, I make her do it. If she finds it upsetting, I sympathize and talk her through it, but I don't give her choices on the issues below.
She just turned 4 1/2. I am thinking I need to start giving her more autonomy. I am wondering how you all handle the following issues:
1. If your DC wants to play outside without a coat, do you let them? What temperature boundary do you use? I swear my daughter is half polar bear. She fights putting on her coat unless it is snowing.
2. How long do you let your DC go without a bath? Or without washing their hair? My limit has been 2 (sometimes 3) days. I also make her bathe whenever she is covered in paint or marker, because we share a bed, and--ewww.
3. Do you force hair brushing? Or if they don't want to brush their hair do you just let them be? I have found this is an issue no matter how short I cut it. The shorter it is, the more it sticks up.
4. Do you let them go outside without shoes? We have crushed rock in our driveway and she has to walk on it to get to the swing set. She insists it doesn't bother her. I make her wear shoes until she gets to the swingset because I don't want her to injure her feet.
I of course give her choices. Brush hair before dressing or after? Tennis shoes or sandals? Blue coat or purple coat? But beyond that, no negotiation.
I am not willing to negotiate on whether or not she brushes her teeth, or whether she can eat junk food, or how much TV she watches. But I'm wondering how much leeway I should give her on other things, now that she is not a toddler any more.
Thoughts?
TIA!
Angie
She just turned 4 1/2. I am thinking I need to start giving her more autonomy. I am wondering how you all handle the following issues:
1. If your DC wants to play outside without a coat, do you let them? What temperature boundary do you use? I swear my daughter is half polar bear. She fights putting on her coat unless it is snowing.
2. How long do you let your DC go without a bath? Or without washing their hair? My limit has been 2 (sometimes 3) days. I also make her bathe whenever she is covered in paint or marker, because we share a bed, and--ewww.
3. Do you force hair brushing? Or if they don't want to brush their hair do you just let them be? I have found this is an issue no matter how short I cut it. The shorter it is, the more it sticks up.
4. Do you let them go outside without shoes? We have crushed rock in our driveway and she has to walk on it to get to the swing set. She insists it doesn't bother her. I make her wear shoes until she gets to the swingset because I don't want her to injure her feet.
I of course give her choices. Brush hair before dressing or after? Tennis shoes or sandals? Blue coat or purple coat? But beyond that, no negotiation.
I am not willing to negotiate on whether or not she brushes her teeth, or whether she can eat junk food, or how much TV she watches. But I'm wondering how much leeway I should give her on other things, now that she is not a toddler any more.
Thoughts?
TIA!
Angie