Do you ever get irritable with your toddler/child? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 05:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I seem to be getting more and more irritable with my 15 month old dd now that I am pregnant...especially when she wants to nurse constantly. I know she is teething, and needs me, but sometimes I can't help it and I get annoyed. Anyone else notice this? Will it get better as the hormones settle? I hope so, for now, I just take a lot of deep breaths and try to relax and not send bad vibes her way.
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#2 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 05:45 PM
 
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OMG yes...
Unfortunately, DS is not nursing, but he is in this totally independent stage. He hates having his diaper changed. He will go get his shoes to go bye-bye but then run away from me instead of coming to get them put on. He used to follow me to the Jeep, now he wants to go down the front steps, even though I KNOW he knows we park out back. It's just that he wants to do it HIS way.
And I find myself doing more yelling, more pick him up and carry him along screaming, etc. than I did before.

I just try to remember he IS only 20 months old, and if I wouldn't dream of acting that way toward a preschooler at work, WHY would I do that to my own son? (but then, maybe I'd get more frustrated with them too if I had to bring them home...) I could learn a little from what I do at work though I think, routine does seem to help us.

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#3 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 06:43 PM
 
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I have been so irratable with my baby and my husband. It's partly my personality, too but I have to keep doing reality checks on myself
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#4 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 06:50 PM
 
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Oh yes, my dds are 9 & 10, I have virtually no patience when they argue with each other. It gets worse when they are doing it when ds is asleep. I am hands' off with their arguments as I refuse to pick sides, so they usually end up solving problems themselves. My 10 y/o is a talker and sometimes I just have to tell her "enough chatter, I can't think". They are really great girls, 99% of the time, just when they get into w/ each other, I get crazy fast.

Ds is still a lil guy, when I need a break from him dh is great and will take him for a walk or dance in the other room until I collect my cookies.

My guess is as the hormones continue to flow we'll adapt a bit better.
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#5 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 06:59 PM
 
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Yup, super irritable with my DD. She's almost 2 1/2 and just potty learned, so she wants to be miss independent but still needs lots of help. She is still nursing and the nursing is still pretty painful for me, and sometimes induces vomiting if its first thing in the morning, so its hard.

My DH has been most of my relief because he can give DD the positive attention she needs. The less attention I'm able to give her because of not feeling well/being tired/etc the more she seems to act up and do crazy things to try to get negative attention. We are trying to make do the best we can, but my patience is definitely a lot lower.

I'm hoping that in a few weeks when I'm into my 2nd trimester that I'll have some energy back and won't be so moody...

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#6 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 07:49 PM
 
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: I'm glad I am not alone. I have been so annoyed at every little thing that my dds do they aren't supposed to. I really hope this passes, i think its because i am so tired and of course hormones. I'm trying really hard but some days it isn't so easy.
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#7 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 09:25 PM
 
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Oh goodness, I have become a total bitch this pregnancy. My DH always claimed I was while pg, but I didnt think so. Oops.

I was talking about it with my midwife this morning, and she said its the baby's way of making space for it in our life... the kids will have to learn to get more independent and deal with my being tired and feeling unwell now, so that by the time the baby comes they will be pros. Makes sense to me!

But its a good thing that I go to bed so early now. I spare DH the worst of it and he still does nice things for me.
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#8 of 17 Old 06-09-2006, 11:58 PM
 
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Oh yeah... DH swears he forgot that I was "like this" when I was PG. AND that I use the PG as an excuse to be mean!!! My poor DD, she's 2 and really just a sweetheart. Kind, empathetic beyond her little years. She has been very sweet with me, hugging and kissing, asking if her "deedees" (her word for nursing) are OK, rubbing my tummy and talking to the "teeny little baby." But boy am I have trouble with her two-year-old-ness sometimes... Hang in there... 14 to 18 months or so was my toughest time with DD-- old enough to be independent but too young to communicate. AND she nursed like non-stop!! Hard time to be in the first trimester

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#9 of 17 Old 06-10-2006, 01:59 AM
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My 5 year old has pretty much moved in with my parents next door : because I kept yelling at him for WHINING and hitting the chickens with a stick. DD is driving me crazy, too, but seems to have no plans for moving out. It's much easier to not lose my temper with her because she's only 16 months old and really has no clue.
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#10 of 17 Old 06-10-2006, 03:20 AM
 
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Oh Yeah, me too! My lil' 17 month old dd especially because she seems to want to nurse ALL day right now and I seem to be having a drop in my supply. I feel bad like I'm really sending her some mixed messages and confusing her. Also I am So exhausted it seems so hard to keep up with her. I can't wait for the 2nd trimester to start feeling good!
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#11 of 17 Old 06-10-2006, 10:59 PM
 
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At times. I have a nursing 13 month old and I know it's worse when i am just trying to do too much. Which i am totally guilty of lately. She's also teething up a storm. nursing isn't painful while she is nursing, but I'm aggitated, if that's the right term, when she isn't. not b/c i want her too, b/c I feel nipple-y overstimulated. lol...KWIM??? I'm trying to nap int he afternoons and that seems to help. Dh is leaving on a business trip for the week starting tomorrow and I am dreading a whole week alone with nobody to help. We have no family close by - My friends are going to used this next week
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#12 of 17 Old 06-12-2006, 11:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh thank goodness I am not alone. I am feeling so guilty. Nipply overstimulated is the perfect way to describe how I feel at times when she is nursing. During the day we are fine, nursing is great, I nap with her, it is great. It is at night that my patience goes downhill fast, that is when she nurses non-stop, and gets fussy. I know she is teething (please come in last eye tooth, please!!) and I know she needs me, but I think cause I am SO tired I have a hard time being woken up for long periods of time at night.
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#13 of 17 Old 06-12-2006, 05:48 PM
 
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YES! I have to be very careful with the tone I use with him. I know it's because I'm not feeling good and I'm so tired. Bless his heart! I have to make a concious decision to be very patient with him many times a day. We skipped the terrible twos and am living large in the TERRIBLE THREES. I keep telling myself he is just going through a phase and I will feel better in a few weeks.
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#14 of 17 Old 06-13-2006, 11:06 AM
 
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Yep, I'm shorter tempered than usual here. I feel like such a rotten mom - I know it's just that I'm over tired and nauseous most of the time. It's not his fault...poor little guy. I try to acknowledge when I've been unfair to him and apologize - I know he doesn't really understand, but it is good practice for me admitting my mistakes.

I hope it'll get better and won't be like this for all 9 months...

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#15 of 17 Old 06-13-2006, 02:26 PM
 
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I am definitely effected by this as well... When I was pregnant with ds last summer I had no patience for my then 15 month old dd... Now that I find myself pregnant again this summer it is the same! I feel so bad for her because she has had to go through this twice in one year!

I have a little bit more patience with my ds. But I think that is because he is still so young and dependent on me!

I can't wait till I start to feel like my hormones are leveling out a bit!
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#16 of 17 Old 06-13-2006, 06:09 PM
 
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Yes, yes, and yes! It's bound to happen given how tired we've all been.

When I start to feel myself loose it I try to remember to take a time out. My DD will (usually) entertain herself for a few minutes if I tell her I'm "going potty". I go into the bathroom for a few for a breather & she's OK with it because she knows I'll be right back out. The wiggling during diaper changes ie enough to drive me crazy...:

My DH & our parents have also been helping a lot with DD. At first I felt guilty but then I realized that this baby *deserves* me to be well rested & fed!

Holly
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#17 of 17 Old 06-13-2006, 08:42 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by haydensmom1
YES! I have to be very careful with the tone I use with him. I know it's because I'm not feeling good and I'm so tired. Bless his heart! I have to make a concious decision to be very patient with him many times a day. We skipped the terrible twos and am living large in the TERRIBLE THREES. I keep telling myself he is just going through a phase and I will feel better in a few weeks.
We are SO in the same situation. Also the endless "why?" stage for almost a year now. I can hear the tone of voice I use when the questions start to get to me and I feel so bad about it- then just sound falsely cheerful when I try to correct it and make it less irritable sounding. Ugh- I can't win. If there was just a temporary off button on the questions.....
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