Positivity!! - Mothering Forums

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Old 12-08-2006, 03:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Okay, ladies, I've been feeling pretty blah lately and overwhelmed with the prospect of taking care of a newborn, so for those experienced moms please share all the wonderful, positive things about being a new mom

I need a boost!
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Old 12-08-2006, 09:22 AM
 
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You will be amazed at how very deeply you can fall in love with someone.
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Old 12-08-2006, 12:20 PM
 
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It is so fulfilling to have this little person completely love you. They trust you and need you and it is a wonderful responsibility. This little person will be a "mini-you" in so many ways, but yet be a part of your spouse and their own person. It is truly amazing. Another really positive thing is how it will change your character and make you a better person.

Now, I had some depression after my son was born and didn't truly know I had fallen in love with until he was 5 weeks old. I only tell you this because it may happen and there are many of us here to walk you through it. However.....

Once you do bond with your child, it is an amazing thing. Look forward to the wonders of getting to know this new little person. You'll be someone's momma!

Trying to build up my house, not tear it down namaste.gif.   Got 3 wonderful kids jumpers.gif  ribboncesarean.gif autismribbon.gif, blessed with a wonderful husband luxlove.gif and have the privilege of staying home full time to enjoy it all! 

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Old 12-08-2006, 12:39 PM
 
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For me the hormonal surge after a traumatic birth was a little much to deal with. Then I was engorged and sure my milk was all being spilled out and the baby wasn't getting enough, despite the fact that he lost only 4 ounces in 3 days after birth and gained exponentially. He was only happy with Mama, no one else.

And then something happened. I got the hang of breastfeeding. We were co-sleeping, he was snuggled up against me and started to root. And I figured out how to nurse laying down in bed. So there we were, all snuggled in and nursing in bed. It was the most perfect moment I have ever experienced.
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Old 12-08-2006, 01:31 PM
 
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I was amazed at how much having a baby made me feel closer to my husband. We've always had a good relationship, but the first couple of weeks after our daughter were even better than usual.

I think a lot of that was because neither of us had anything else we really needed to be doing other than being together and being with our daughter. Whatever it was, it was terrific.

Sonja , 40, married to DH (42) since 5-29-93, DD born 11-3-2004, DS born 1-18-2007.
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Old 12-08-2006, 01:53 PM
 
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I second what all the other mommas has said, and on a less emotional/more practical note, I actually felt more well-rested AFTER our son was born than I did for the month or so before he arrived! I suffered from terrible insomnia, what with the hourly trips to the toilet, lying awake worrying about baby's and my health (we both had some medical issues) and just the general racing mind thinking "Do we have enough diapers? Did we choose the right name? Will I go into labour before my docs insist on inducing me? Did I lock the back door and let the dog out before I came to bed? etc., etc., etc... Once kiddo made his debut all of that calmed down (the whole bladder thing was the greatest! You go from feeling like a 65 y/o man with prostate AND bladder control issues to being a normal person again! ) and when I slept in-between feeding I really and truly rested.

I don't know how much help you are going to have early on, but take what you can get. We established that hubby or my mom (who stayed with us for a while after baby was born) would change baby at night so I didn't have to do anything more than roll over to nurse him (we co-slept from the begining) and that helped a lot. They also made sure that I really rested throughout the day--even if you are alone with your little one be sure to do what everyone says and rest when s/he does. I lived by the saying "Don't stand when your can sit, don't sit when you can lay down".

I'm not saying that everything was fabulous and easy, but many of those feelings of overwhelming stress really did just melt away, I promise.
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Old 12-08-2006, 04:29 PM
 
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Oh, QuantumMama -

When my son looked at me that first day, I can't even describe how amazing it was. J & I were both just in awe-filled love, so honored and amazed that we MADE this person who was so incredibly perfect and beautiful. Today I was nursing him after breakfast, and he looked right into my eyes very seriously and I felt it again - like I have 1000+ times between his birth day and today.

Really, there is NOTHING cooler or a greater paradigm changer than being a mom. Even when they are melting down on the floor or have just pooped through their 5th outfit of the day or...you know, you haven't slept in what feels like a week. Even when you JUST NEED A BREAK, DAMNIT. Even then, really, it's still the coolest, most impressively life-changing thing EVER.

Hope your blahs perk up soon!!!

MWAH!

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Old 12-08-2006, 05:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks everyone :-D I can feel the love you all have for your babies and that gives me lots of reassurance and hope. It sounds like it's such a phenomenal experience...there probably really isn't words for it.
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Old 12-08-2006, 05:23 PM
 
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You made a PERSON! A real, live, tiny wee little person! You made him/her, your body did this. It's the most surreal thing to hold your baby and marvel over how it could have possibly been made by your own body.

Allison.... mom of DS1 (7) and DS2 (4) and awaiting #3 near the end of April 2011
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Old 12-08-2006, 05:27 PM
 
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Hi there!
Okay, I like to gush about this subject

My first child was not planned....I was already 4 months along when I found out I was pregnant....almost halfway through, not planning on being a mom.
I hardly felt connected to him while he was inside of me. I wanted the best outcome but I really didn't feel any strong emotional connection.
I worried about how I would mother...I fell into the mainstream ideas that you need lots of "stuff" to help quell the baby...swing, playyard, bouncer seat, bassinette, vibrating this or that.....you name it.
When my son was born, I remember that my first emotions were a bit of shock and surprise...there he was right in front of me, this little stranger.
Then I lowered my lips to his little forehead and I kissed him. I can only describe that first kiss (which I'll always remember) as foreign and familiar at the same time...there I was kissing this little guy/"stranger" for the first time and yet, I felt like I had known him for a long time : )
Then it happened...HARD AND FAST. Over the next days/weeks, I literally fell in love with my baby. I never felt such strong protective/loving/mama bear instincts before. I only wanted to protect him and hold him and love him. The "stuff" that I had thought I would need to help me mother was cast aside. All my baby wanted was my arms, my voice, my breasts...I didn't need anything to help me mother..."mother" was in me all along.
Congratulations on approaching one of the (if not THE) most amazing, privileges ever....being a Mother!

With love,
Mel.
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Old 12-08-2006, 08:36 PM
 
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YAY MAMAS!!! You have all inspired me...I can't wait!

Woo-hoo!!! :
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Old 12-08-2006, 09:05 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swtpesq View Post
YAY MAMAS!!! You have all inspired me...I can't wait!

Woo-hoo!!! :
Christina, I have to admit...I'm a bit jealous of the first-time mamas who get to experience this INTENSE experience for the first time.
I am told by many many moms that it is just the same with subsequent babies...but I can't help but imagine that falling into that kind of love the first time is such a WONDERFULLY new, surprising and humbling experience
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Old 12-09-2006, 09:13 PM
 
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"...one thing about having a baby, is that each step of the way, you simply cannot imagine loving him more that you already do, because you are bursting with love, loving as much as you are humanly capable of, and then you do; you love him even more." Anne Lamott

It is very true. As older parents have been head to say - "You think you love him now....just wait." as they nod knowingly.

Julia
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Old 12-11-2006, 11:54 AM
 
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Oh, thank you for this!! I am getting so excited about meeting my little one!!! : :
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