Becoming a boring mommy - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 09:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm getting into a phase here it seems where I don't really want to go out on my own any more with dd to the grocery store or wherever. I'm having to pee so frequently and getting all her crap together and packing up snacks and water and ... and... and... it is just getting to be a huge hassle. Even at home my preggo brain is rather uncreative with things for her to do. We don't have a yard and our toy selection is limited (compared to some people's) because we don't have room in our apartment for a lot. She does have toys - plenty of them IMO but - gets bored with the same things. I'm so tired and fuzzy brained and uncreative at this point - she's watching too much tv.

My dh and I are considering putting her in 2 day a week preschool to give her some stimulation and playground time and interaction with someone besides her drowsy sometimes grumpy mommy. It's something we keep going back and forth on as far as whether or not we can afford it. But with the baby coming it would be good to have something she can get out and go to and have fun. In February with a newborn I am not going to be motivated to load up and go a bunch of fun places. : So she's going to be rather home bound for a while it looks.

I don't really know what I'm trying to say here other than towards the end of this pregnancy - I am not winning any mother extraordinaire awards. I feel bad for my dd that she is stuck here with me and she’s definitely acting out with her boring mommy. We’re running errands today as long as I can get my act together and get out the door. She loves going to my midwife appointments and those are getting more frequent. My dh does take her out but he restarts grad school classes tonight after work so he’s not going to be around nearly as much until May so he can only do so much.

I'm sure there are a dozen nifty ideas out there and crafts webpages and recipes we could be whipping up together. I'm not really short on ideas - I used to be *that* mom. I just don't have the energy for it all right now.
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#2 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 09:49 AM
 
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I don't have any helpful advice; only wanted to say that I'm right there with you. I'm pretty sure I'd be in the running for worst mommy of the year award. I force myself to go to story time at the library every Tuesday; it requires getting us dressed and out the door by 7 so we can take dh to work first. : I keep telling myself it's only temporary. I may not have a ton of energy once the baby is here, but I can at least pick her up and snuggle her without a big belly.
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#3 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 11:46 AM
 
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i'm right there with you. but now i have a yard! it's in terrible condition though and ds seems to know it, staying only in one area of the yard, close to me.

getting him ready to go out generally saps all of my energy before we even step out the front door. over the xmas hols dh was home so i didn't even go out a few days, dh brought ds out.

we don't have a ton of toys either, but i try to rotate them. tuck some away and then trot them out and they're new again!
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#4 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 12:05 PM
 
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I was a bad Mommy BEFORE I was pregnant lol. I feel guilty all the time too. It's just worse now. I always told myself "tomorrow" I will do this or that but I wake up the same person. Now it's not even an option and it's weighing on me like it is you guys.

My mom said something to me about this that made me feel better and that is that I do not exist solely to be a source of constant entertainment. Kids do get something from being creative themselves you know? I also tell myself that ds is lucky to have his Mommy all day. Even if I am not full of fun and creative ideas all the time, I am here for him to feed him and give him hugs and kisses whenever he wants.
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#5 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 05:11 PM
 
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I'm also a bad mommy lately. Its worse here because we have a foot and a half of snow and its really windy, so I can't even throw him outside in our yard (which is really great -- I love our yard) or walk the 2 blocks to the park.

Dh keeps reminding me that we are just in survival mode right now. The point is to get through the next few months, have the baby and get through the newborn stage. AFter that we can pick up on things like keeping the house in order and having more exciting things for ds to do.

Also, my friend Sharon who has 3 kids, the second and third 14 mos apart, makes a good point -- its out kids' job to play, and ours to make sure they are safe, well fed, cared for and have things to play with.

Jill , mom to Andrew (09/04), Aaron(01/07), and Emma (11/09)
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#6 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 05:50 PM
 
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I am failing at this too *sigh*.. I just feel Kapoot at this point.... It seems so hard too get up and get motivated anymore. My 4 yr old got the Phonics for Christmas, and she has been wanting too do this since the day she opened it,andI just cannot seem too wrap my mind around doing this with her..I feel AWFUL, cause she is so very eager too learn..I have a terrible head cold right now, the klids have been sick since day after Christmas ( getting better ) but I just wanna curl up and sleep for days.

Your not alone, sending you tons of HUGS!!
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#7 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 06:33 PM
 
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I'm there with you, feeling like the worst mom in the world. I couldn't even spend a full half-hour at the library today. I've been thinking that school is going to have to happen at some point even though I'm not really going to do it.

Seems I just want to take care of myself and not the house, kids, DH, dishes, laundry, etc. Even feeding myself seems like an ordeal.
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#8 of 12 Old 01-03-2007, 08:13 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MotherWren View Post

My mom said something to me about this that made me feel better and that is that I do not exist solely to be a source of constant entertainment. Kids do get something from being creative themselves you know? I also tell myself that ds is lucky to have his Mommy all day. Even if I am not full of fun and creative ideas all the time, I am here for him to feed him and give him hugs and kisses whenever he wants.
This is very true...my son is in Kindergarten now & gets his love from his teacher during part of the day...it really stinks! I miss being at home with him. Just do what you can & everything will be fine. Well, that is my motto at least

A doula who married a cop & became a mama to 3 boys: G 12/22/00, my rainbow baby B 2/2/07 and L 2/10/10 my CBA2V baby, waiting for my little caboose late February 2013 & always remembering my two angels 2006 & 2012.

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#9 of 12 Old 01-04-2007, 01:26 AM
 
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I am right there with ya. We have been housebound now for months since we just can't seem to get the car running. We used to do so much! Now I have had trouble walking since October so getting outside is pretty much out. I stick them out there sometimes but it has been so cold and wet that they don't want to go. I have been taking them to McD's on occasion to make sure they get exercise at their playground!!! Dh works constantly so he can't pick up my slack. I have been really sloacking on homeschooling too and entertained the idea of putting ds1 in public school. They are so bored they argue and are just generally bored all the time. I feel like we are in survival mode too. I just keep thinking things will be so much better come baby's arrival and spring!

~Lanie mom to Layne, Liam, Maren, Meridian, and Melora
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#10 of 12 Old 01-04-2007, 11:01 AM
 
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Hugs, mama! I think our lack of energy right now has a lot to do with it...I'm feeling too tired to do anything! We HAVE to try and get groceries this morning (as in, we've had no milk for three days and it's getting BAD!) and I'm dreading it SO! Just the thoughts of having to put clothes on wears me out. I know that my play with DS has been severely lacking lately and I feel horrible about it. We are normally TV free, but I've slipped into letting him watch a few videos this week...then felt guilty as heck afterwards...like I'm slighting him because of MY tiredness.

I'm waiting on that "second wind" you are supposed to get in the late third tri...LOL!
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#11 of 12 Old 01-04-2007, 11:59 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Cloth4Colin View Post
I'm waiting on that "second wind" you are supposed to get in the late third tri...LOL!
: I'm wondering when nesting is gonna kick in! I think it's the only way anything is going to get done around here. I'm actually thinking of having some professional help w/ cleaning for awhile. I've been getting estimates. Not that we can afford this but I'd probably spend the money elsewhere anyway lol.
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#12 of 12 Old 01-04-2007, 03:40 PM
 
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Oh... you and me both! I am not going to win any awards for mothering at this point... or for cooking, or housekeeping... ugh! I'm too tired, not sleeping enough because I can't, and I'm just so sore, I just can't physically DO anything without paying for it! Today is going to be my last day grocery shopping without DH. I hurt so much by the time I got everything put away, and it's just a fraction of what I would be doing on a non pregnant day.

DS watches too much TV too, and I don't want to go anywhere either, it's just SUCH a chore going anywhere! If I could mail order everything, you better believe I would!!
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