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Old 08-12-2006, 01:40 AM
 
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Well, s for the anxiety - I've dealt with clinical anxiety and know it sucks mucho - and for a !
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Old 08-12-2006, 02:40 AM
 
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Amber, welcome and congratulations on your pregnancy! I'm so sorry about your previous loss. I hope that your anxiety lessens as the days and weeks go by....
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Old 08-12-2006, 02:53 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Heather - I'm so sorry to see you go. Take good care of yourself.

Welcome, Amber.
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Old 08-12-2006, 05:19 PM
 
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Welcome Amber!!!!!!! I can relate to your anxiety too!

Tomorrow marks 8 weeks for me, and that's when I M/C 3 1/2 years ago. However, I'd already been spotting lightly for a week. I remember that it seemed as painful as labor. Maybe the sadness and pointlessless of it all makes the pain worse? I let myself take 4 Advil during the M/C.

I can't seem to let myself feel like everthing is okay. I went to bed at 7:30 last night and then got up at 11:00 and went online because I was sure I was having symptoms of an ectopic pregnancy (I'm not). I feel like I'm going crazy. With DS, we had an u/s at 10.5 weeks. Seeing him made me feel like everything was okay. But this time I'm not willing to trade baby's safety for my anxiety, and I question u/s safety more than I used to. I'll have to wait until I feel movement or hear the on a fetascope before I'll let myself think all is well.


Jenny, reading & writing mama of dd(18), ds(6), and ds(3)
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Old 08-12-2006, 08:54 PM
 
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I've gotten a chance to read through the threads, and I am so sorry for those that have lost again.

Jennyclaire, I went ahead and got an ultrasound : . I really wanted to, because my anxiety was affecting my relationship with DH, and making me depressed so I was having trouble taking care of Ian. They wound up doing an internal ultrasound, which I hadn't heard of. I let them do it because that's why I was there, but I wish I hadn't. It made me so crampy I was even more anxious for awhile. And the heartbeat was there, but the baby is measuring three days smaller than my dates, which gave my anxiety something else to fixate on...

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Old 08-13-2006, 09:19 AM
 
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Amber, don't worry about baby being 3 days too small for date! I have been given such inaccurate information from u/s in the past that I take the technology with a grain of salt, and will not use it unless serious complications develop (i.e. - no fetal movement or heartbeat detected in later pregnancy, bleeding after the 1st trimester...). I'm glad you saw a heartbeat --- I would focus on that and forget the rest. Both of my DC were born TO THE DAY of when they were supposed to be according to my dates, even though ultrasound gave a different picture. I was also told DD was "deprived" in the womb, although she was born healthy, exactly on time, and 7.4 lbs.

Has the crampiness stopped?

My pregnancy symptoms are back again --- I don't know why I got a break for a few days. My body is not doing a very good job of fighting this sore throat/cold though. I wonder if the immune system gets shut down a bit so that the baby isn't attacked?

Jenny, reading & writing mama of dd(18), ds(6), and ds(3)
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Old 08-15-2006, 12:55 AM
 
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My symptoms are kind of back, too. Weird. Today and yesterday I was slightly queasy. Not unbearable, but definitely notable. I think it's because I was "complaining" that with the lack of symptoms I was beginning to suspect another m/c...

I hit 10 weeks on Friday, so I've past the time when I m/c last time. Only 17 more days until my OB appt! I'm getting more hopeful everyday that this babe will stick!

Sticky baby dust, Mamas!!!

Leah coolshine.gif adoptionheart-1.gif homebirth.jpg

Hubby guitar.gif, ds (11) REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, adopted dd (10) notes2.gif, dd (6) dust.gif, dd (1) femalesling.GIF & 3 foster dd's wheelchair.gif upsidedown.gif diaper.gif  

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Old 08-15-2006, 10:16 AM
 
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You know. . I was camping with my family last week and all my symptoms dissappeared for 3-4 days. I didn't think much about the slight nausea and food aversions going away (I chalked that up to being active and so much fresh air). But my boobs no longer being sore. . that troubled me. I got all depressed convinced that the pregnancy was over.

But then driving home I started feeling car sick, and cranky. ANd being home my symptoms are pretty much back. They've all been pretty faint (except for that moment each day when I take off my bra, Ouch!), so it can be somewhat nerve wracking. :

Be, happy momma to Liberty (12-31-02), Henry (3-17-07) and Prudence (7-02-09)
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Old 08-15-2006, 01:50 PM
 
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I think I've said on here - when I was helping at the conference a week ago, including one night where I got NO sleep, my symptoms faded almost completely (except being hungry). At first I thought I was going to miscarry at the bloody conference - then I just figured the baby must have gone in to hibernation or something because I needed the energy right then. It does make me wonder both how much our experience of symptoms is a result of the way we choose to pay attention to them, and how much damage it does to completely focus all our energy on something else for a while. (I don't think either of those is completely true, just interesting ideas.)
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Old 08-15-2006, 11:54 PM
 
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Very interesting Arwyn. I've heard that in some cultures, women don't even get "morning sickness" at all. Their indication of a pregnancy being "real" might be a dream or something. But here we are waiting to "feel sick," and worry if we don't.

Feeling VERY sick, by the way.......

Jenny, reading & writing mama of dd(18), ds(6), and ds(3)
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Old 08-16-2006, 02:59 AM
 
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A culture with no morning sickness? Sign me up! Seriously, I would love to know more about that. About the mindset, and the physical symptoms they DO have, and everything. I love learning about people... and I would love a way to get rid of morning sickness!
That being said, I am actually a big dork. Every afternoon I feel better than the morning, and every afternoon I am convinced something is wrong... today after a week of this pattern I was finally able to tell myself that this is normal, and to be glad it's better. And sure enough, it came back even stronger in the evening.
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Old 08-17-2006, 03:03 PM
 
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I wouldn't argue against maybe a LITTLE of m/s being psychological, but I think that the bulk of it isn't imagined. Distraction can help sometimes, but that's how it is with any discomfort I think. Cultural differences might be more related to diet or even genetics.

I'm basing that unscientific theory entirely on myself. I didn't expect m/s to hit until 7 weeks with dd (for some reason, I forget why) but it hit at 6. I didn't expect it to hit until 6 weeks this time since that's what happened with dd, but it hit me bad by 5 weeks. I also expected it to start going away by 11 wks, since that is what happened with dd, but I still have it (and here I am at 12 weeks today!) And I expected to feel sick when I was pregnant with my first (the one I lost) but didn't.

So, some good news I hope: I can palpitate my belly and feel my uterus (yay!) and I think I could tell that it grew over the past week... it feels like a small grapefruit! So that's fun. And I think I might be feeling flutters, but it's just so dang early it probably is psychological.

I am meeting with the midwife next week and I'm going to see if she can hear the hb with a fetoscope. I read in the midwife archives that a midwife there could occasionally hear the hb as early as 13 weeks with the fetoscope. I'll be right around 13 weeks, so I thought it might be worth a try!!
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Old 08-17-2006, 06:28 PM
 
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By the way, regarding cultural differences with nausea -- just saw this at the new york times (here is an excerpt):

"The scientists noted that meats led the list of troubling foods, and meats (both undercooked and cooked but inadequately refrigerated) can harbor organisms that cause fetal malformations. Raw fish, popular in Japan where 84 percent of pregnant women experience nausea and vomiting, is another source of parasites. But in societies where morning sickness rarely occurs, the dietary staples are grains, not meat or fish, the Cornell scientists reported."

I'm not necessarily agreeing that raw fish is bad for pregnant women today -- but maybe it's something that harkens back to our evolutionary past? I know I for one have had an amazing aversion to meat and fish. Intersting anyway... and I think this supports that there is more to it probably than just a mindset.
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Old 08-17-2006, 09:03 PM
 
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Yes! The site, smell, or even thought of meat has made me sick with this pregnancy, as well as my first. The worst are the food commercials where they're cooking a steak or something... Sorry for the graffic smiley, but: :Puke

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Old 08-17-2006, 09:37 PM
 
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I can't get enough meat. I'm usually a non-mammal-eater, but steak has been looking sooooooooooo good to me recently.

And I love me my sushi. :
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Old 08-17-2006, 10:05 PM
 
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Actually, it's not "real" sushi I guess, but some frickin' California rolls sound so yummy right now!

Leah coolshine.gif adoptionheart-1.gif homebirth.jpg

Hubby guitar.gif, ds (11) REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, adopted dd (10) notes2.gif, dd (6) dust.gif, dd (1) femalesling.GIF & 3 foster dd's wheelchair.gif upsidedown.gif diaper.gif  

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Old 08-17-2006, 10:40 PM
 
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Yup, this pregnancy and last I wanted meat much more than normal. I started eating hamburgers last pregnancy, and seafood, both of which I never really cared for before. Of course, I was also extremely sick last pregnancy, so there might be something there... and now I want sushi! Thanks guys!
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Old 08-18-2006, 12:03 AM
 
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OK, is it just me, or is anyone else really gassy? I wasn't more gassy than usual with my last pregnancy, but this one has been crazy. Poor DH... :

Leah coolshine.gif adoptionheart-1.gif homebirth.jpg

Hubby guitar.gif, ds (11) REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, adopted dd (10) notes2.gif, dd (6) dust.gif, dd (1) femalesling.GIF & 3 foster dd's wheelchair.gif upsidedown.gif diaper.gif  

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Old 08-18-2006, 01:08 AM
 
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Definitly me. A lot. I did have my gall bladder out since last pregnancy, though, which could be a factor. I am trying to look at it as a good thing, cause even when my other symptoms are gone, that is still there... so it's reassuring, right?
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Old 08-18-2006, 03:39 AM
 
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Gas, and constipation, and my body hair is getting darker (there are dark patches of hair on both my knees now!). The things no one mentions about pregnancy...

OK, so I think I'd actually heard all of those before, but they didn't quite sink in I guess.
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Old 08-18-2006, 01:02 PM
 
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Gee thanks to all you meat cravers for coming in and messing up my perfect theory! Seriously though, what's a brain to do -- we need protein to build a healthy baby, but we need to protect the babe from pathogens... no wonder I can stand in my fully-stocked kitchen for an hour, completely unable to find something that I think my conflicted body will let me keep down.

Gassy -- yeah. You know those flutters I mentioned in my post yesterday? 100% attributable to this probably. Sigh.
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Old 08-19-2006, 12:32 AM
 
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Well, I made it to 11 weeks today!
I made it farther along than last time! I am hoping, hoping, hoping that all these strong symptoms I'm having are signs of a healhty little plum inside my grapefruit right now! I *think* I may just be confident enough to accept that I am GOING TO HAVE A BABY in the spring!
I started looking at diapers on e-bay and the TP and I am so excited! I really hope I can actually buy some for a real live baby this time! Now, don't get me thinking about all the problems that can still occur... At least I made it this far, right?

Anyone else starting to get a little more confident that we might stay pregnant this time?

Leah coolshine.gif adoptionheart-1.gif homebirth.jpg

Hubby guitar.gif, ds (11) REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, adopted dd (10) notes2.gif, dd (6) dust.gif, dd (1) femalesling.GIF & 3 foster dd's wheelchair.gif upsidedown.gif diaper.gif  

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Old 08-19-2006, 03:17 AM
 
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I've started buying diapers. And I already know the first clothes I'm buying for the babe, too!
I'm definitely in that much-more-confident place! Though, I'm still kinda anxious to hear the heartbeat!

ETA: I've also picked out the carriers that I'm getting this time! I'm really excited!

You can find me on Facebook. PM for info.
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Old 08-20-2006, 04:43 AM
 
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im doing my best to believe that December Sun ( Baby in the spring that is).
But its hard...But Im trying and deep inside I do believe.

Happy mama to my four girls S 8.15.02 , L 04.25.06 (gone at 36 weeks ) and L 3.10.07.And another rainbow! Baby C has arrived 10.26.10!
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Old 08-20-2006, 02:49 PM
 
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I haven't been able to bring myself to buy anything yet, but when I turned 12 weeks last Thursday I did go ahead and knit a little pair of cute baby booties.
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Old 08-21-2006, 03:21 AM
 
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Astromom - congratulations on the 12 week mark! Thats awesome!

December Sun-you are almost there too!!!

Ill be 9 weeks on tuesday. I am jealous of you 11 and 12 weekers. In a nice way of course.

Arwyn- I had sushi yesterday and it was DAMN GOOD. I only ate 4 pieces though (spicy tuna i love you) with the raw fish (a cutroll mind you-so it has way less fish) then stuffed myself with the cucumber roll and rice to calm down.

I am so hungry ALL the time, Im enjoying it though and have been buying lots of my favorite fruits and veggies. Also I get sleepy a lot, take a nap every single day-I seriously feel like I have become lazy and useless

My Sofie turned 4 where does the time go? I am planning her birthday party now (cant do it till september as all of her preschool is out). I am so excited because she has never had a party before. We always made her feel special on her bdays but this time she has girlfriends coming over and we got each girl a dress so they are dressing up like princesses! And Sofie is getting a special dress, thats different from everyone elses-its a princess Belle dress-and Belle herself will be showing up at the party!
Oh so here is the hilarious part- I was at a store a few weeks ago and while standing in line waiting to pay I saw this dress on sale-light yellow and glittery and it looked all poofy like a prom dress i guess. Well then i saw the price and I couldnt not buy it- it was marked down many many times and ended up being $13 from $200. I have NEVER worn anything like this in my entire life. But I know Sofie will just love it if i dress up in a poofy dress like all the girls, because sometimes she asks if mommy is a princess: So today I used the opportunity of being home alone and tried on this creation. Oh my! I am looking like a VERY pregnant yellow fluffy THING. It is HILARIOUS.

ok shutting up now.

Happy mama to my four girls S 8.15.02 , L 04.25.06 (gone at 36 weeks ) and L 3.10.07.And another rainbow! Baby C has arrived 10.26.10!
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Old 08-22-2006, 06:59 PM
 
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ILoveMySofie, my dd just turned 4 too and I can't believe it either. The party you are going to have sounds soooo cute!

So I just had my first midwife appointment! It was great! I love these midwives. They did go ahead and try to listen for the hb with the fetoscope, but I'm 2 days shy of 13 weeks and it's just too early. So sweet of them to try though! I almost caved to doppler but they said my uterus was a nice big perfect size and that filled me with a lot of peace so I was able to skip it. I would have loved for them to hear the hb, but I will just have to wait until the next appointment. I'll be 16 weeks then and hopefully I should be feeling unmistakable movements by then and they should be able to pick up the hb with the fetoscope then too!
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Old 08-23-2006, 02:45 PM
 
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Yay, yay, yay! We're on our way! Getting bigger every day!

OK, I didn't really mean to rhyme that much, it just turned out like that.

Leah coolshine.gif adoptionheart-1.gif homebirth.jpg

Hubby guitar.gif, ds (11) REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, adopted dd (10) notes2.gif, dd (6) dust.gif, dd (1) femalesling.GIF & 3 foster dd's wheelchair.gif upsidedown.gif diaper.gif  

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Old 08-23-2006, 11:59 PM
 
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It's so nice to hear the confidence going around this thread. Just where it's needed the most! It may just give me enough confidence too.

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Old 08-25-2006, 01:49 AM
 
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Today is four months since we lost Lucia...

I have such a heaviness in my chest i feel like i cant breathe.

Happy mama to my four girls S 8.15.02 , L 04.25.06 (gone at 36 weeks ) and L 3.10.07.And another rainbow! Baby C has arrived 10.26.10!
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