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#1 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yes or no?

I'm feeling guilty
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#2 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:30 PM
 
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Yes!!!

DH and I have been out of sync for months, going many weeks at a time without. We're back in sync again...thankfully!

Gotta make up for lost time and stock up for even more lost time after the baby comes. tee hee
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#3 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:35 PM
 
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I am confused Are you asking if we are still having it? If that is your question, oh yeah. Not only is my dh a scopio sex maniac, he is also going to be deployed on and off throughout the next month and a half. And after that the whole "6 weeks" that ends up more like 3 after baby of recovery, well, I am trying to get as much in as possible. The poor guy. Though I admit that it is really uncomfy. And he knows this so he tries to make it worth it for me. He is such a sweetie and massages my back thoughout. Though really, we have had some miscommunication of, can you massage my back and he thinks I am asking for something else...Or he says, I will massage your back and I think I am just getting a massage....sigh
Why do you feel guilty?
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#4 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:40 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ah, scorpios... I know them well

I'm feeling guilty cause I'm still not interested in sex very often... once or twice a week maybe? MAYbe.

And yes, that is what I was asking.
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#5 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:44 PM
 
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yes.. but really the ponly way we can DtD is on hands and knees.. this belly is just too big.. and i can't breath..LOL...

We may not have it all together, but together we have it all , Loving their daddy, my hubby, our soldier
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#6 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:45 PM
 
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I wouldn't feel guilty, I mean if I wasn't getting a massage with it, I am not sure if it would really be worth it. With the whole pelvic thing going, I feel horribly clumsy and we have had to eliminate many postions. Pretty much the only thing that works is spooning.
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#7 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:46 PM
 
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We found an awesome "T" shaped position when preggo with DD and it's worked just as well this time around.
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#8 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:46 PM
 
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Hey, deuxceleste, I think you need to start more threads!

As for sex...what is that again? Oh, yeah, it's what got us in this condition, right?

I haven't had a libido in months. For a while, I ignored that, and went by DH's cues. But the last time we had sex, I "popped" something in my pelvis, and I've had pelvic/hip pain ever since (that was...I don't know! Before Christmas). Makes it hard to WANT to do anything, and coupled with my lack of libido, well...there hasn't been any action in our bed in a long time.

BUT, and I'm hoping this means a change is coming, I've had sex dreams twice this week! And once I woke up on the verge of orgasm (oh, damn dog for waking me up!). Maybe a little sex is still possible before DS arrives...one can hope!

ETA: I should add that my DH is COMPLETELY understanding, and seems to have resigned himself to no sex for the foreseeable future. We do kiss and cuddle and get close, just no genital play at all.

(oh, yeah, and I'm a Scorpio, too. A Scorpio with no sex drive! Who knew that was possible??)

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#9 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:46 PM
 
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Yeah, but we only do it about once or twice a week. Poor DH, for a while there it was less than once a week and I felt terrible, but I was honestly not interested at ALL. We've tried to *glam* it up and change things around so that I feel more interested and that has really worked. I know things get better after the baby comes so I guess I feel less guilty since I realize it is a temporary lull for us!

SAHM to four beautiful babes :
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#10 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:48 PM
 
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Gee....you all are still having sex? Now I feel guilty lol.
Now I may have to tell dh to come home early.
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#11 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 05:51 PM
 
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"t" postion? Explain tika, if you can. I am trying to figure it out but my imagination isn't working too well I guess.
and Karen, no I didn't think it was possible to see a scorpio with no sex drive. But then pregnancy does weird things.
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#12 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 06:05 PM
 
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It is tricky and sometimes takes a minute for us to get situated and remember what goes where though we're getting pretty good at remembering...

Let's see...me laying pretty much on my back, hips tilted up and a little toward DH. DH is on his side facing me and enters somewhat toward the back at an angle (making a "T" shape almost). I have one leg (the one closest to him) on top of his hip and the other leg is in between his legs. I grab his top leg and pull toward me during. I think I let my hips back down once he is inserted properly.

LMAO @ my description, I hope that's right.

Provides perfect stimulation in front for me to O and my belly isn't in the way at all.

That was really hard to explain!
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#13 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 06:17 PM
 
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Sex? What's that?

me knit.gif, he bikenew.gif, my three reading.gif, sleepytime.gif, and fairy.gif-- and the one we lost angel2.gif
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#14 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 06:17 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tika View Post
Let's see...me laying pretty much on my back, hips tilted up and a little toward DH. DH is on his side facing me and enters somewhat toward the back at an angle (making a "T" shape almost). I have one leg (the one closest to him) on top of his hip and the other leg is in between his legs. I grab his top leg and pull toward me during. I think I let my hips back down once he is inserted properly.


We did this a lot in the second trimester. A little awkward at times, but it works. :

Karen love.gif James -- DS drum.gif (2/07) DD baby.gif (11/05/10) angel1.gif (9/05) (10/09)
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#15 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 06:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Sex? What's that?
Eh.
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#16 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 06:26 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Wild Flowers View Post
I wouldn't feel guilty, I mean if I wasn't getting a massage with it, I am not sure if it would really be worth it. With the whole pelvic thing going, I feel horribly clumsy and we have had to eliminate many postions. Pretty much the only thing that works is spooning.
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We found an awesome "T" shaped position when preggo with DD and it's worked just as well this time around.
I know both positions very well. We also do a lot of doggy. But I am only having it about once a week to every other week depending on my mood. And with DD I didn't wait the full 6 weeks and that was after a c/s. I think the night after I came home we did. But he was so gental. But any way right now DH works 2 jobs and I am working one so I guess we are just to tired to think about it.
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#17 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 06:53 PM
 
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Sex? : Yeah right.

My sex drive went out the window right around the time I got pg. It always happens to me this way. I won't really get it back until I wean this babe - which isn't likely to happen for over a year.

But, it has happened occasionally this pregnancy. I asked Dh a couple weeks ago about his "needs" and he basically said that he's too afraid of hurting me. It is a logical answer as I've had severe pelvic problems this pregnancy and I'm in a lot of pain most of the time.

I figure it will happen at least one more time - in about 7-8 weeks when I'm begging him to do his "manly duty" and get the baby out.
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#18 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 07:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Sex? : Yeah right.

My sex drive went out the window right around the time I got pg. It always happens to me this way. I won't really get it back until I wean this babe - which isn't likely to happen for over a year.

But, it has happened occasionally this pregnancy. I asked Dh a couple weeks ago about his "needs" and he basically said that he's too afraid of hurting me. It is a logical answer as I've had severe pelvic problems this pregnancy and I'm in a lot of pain most of the time.

I figure it will happen at least one more time - in about 7-8 weeks when I'm begging him to do his "manly duty" and get the baby out.
lol yes! I guess i never thought of it that way before! His "manly duty." Hm. He'd like that.

Over a year? Wow. See... I know *intellectually* dp knows that it might be a while, but does he really *understand......*? Time will tell. And hopefully I won't be out of the sex loop forever.

But yes, I completely understand the pain. And part of what turns me off to sex is that I feel so sexually UNadventurous. Like, as in "okay, this is the ONE position that you can take, but DON'T take too long, k, you gotta be quick cause it starts hurting after a minute."

Sigh. Pregnancy woes.
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#19 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 07:53 PM
 
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tika, yes. . that's a really great position.

We've been DTD once or twice a week which is actually pretty frequent for us. It's good, but, um. . doesn't last very long. I am very quick to O and even quicker when pregnant. . .

Be, happy momma to Liberty (12-31-02), Henry (3-17-07) and Prudence (7-02-09)
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#20 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 09:05 PM
 
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Tika, we have done that postion. I can't be on my back like at all anymore. It kinda sucks. I used to be able to handle it for longer the last two times, this time I start really getting out of breath and light headed and not just because of activities. I remember last pregnancy I had heard if you prop up one side of your back it wouldn't be so bad, the baby wouldn't be lying on that vein. Well, don't try sex like that, it really doesn't work very well Bemommy, I am the same way. He has apoligized a few times for being quick, its like, thats fine honey, prefer it that way, do you really need to be sorry when you o once and I 10 times? I don't think so. Though this postion isn't the greatest for it. But I am pregnant enough that a massage is preferable to Oing.
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#21 of 53 Old 01-24-2007, 11:15 PM
 
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Over a year? Wow. See... I know *intellectually* dp knows that it might be a while, but does he really *understand......*? Time will tell. And hopefully I won't be out of the sex loop forever.

I should clarify. It takes me a long time to get my drive back, but we do have sex. Just infrequently. We maybe average once a month. When I got pregnant with Ds we had literally had sex once in four or five months. No question about my dates!

I have some hormone issues that probably exacerbate the problem. After this baby is born I will be trying a bunch of things that my CPMs and the OB/GYN I see for my ovarian issues came up with. Some pharma meds and some herbal stuff combined. I'm also going to ingest my placenta this time to see if it helps with PPD and my hormone problems.

I am very blessed to have a Dh who is really understanding about it all. He's not home a lot - he's away for work- but the fact that when he is home that he doesn't put a lot of pressure on me is wonderful.
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#22 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 12:41 AM
 
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Well, with DH commuting 5 days a week, we're down to just the weekends - but at least 1ce a week still. We hit a slump there for a while - mostly b/c DH was working too late and I would be asleep when he came to bed, then DD would wake us up. I must say, I have zero interest in DTD if there's no O in it for me, so if I were uncomfortable, it would be a no-go. I'm still cool to be on top, and that's my position of choice anyway. So it's still good, and we're still having it!

I firmly believe that separation from DH contributed to Robin being born at 42 weeks - so DH knows he'll be on stud service as my due date approaches. Even if that means a 4 hour commute for booty!

Also, for me it was a while after having Robin before we DTD again. Lactating totally supressed my sex drive (my motivation was so low), and I had a 3rd degree tear that wasn't healing quickly. I hated that it was 3 months before we DTD again - I wasn't ready until 2 months, and then spent another month waiting for DH to initiate - and he was patiently waiting for me to initiate. PPD made me crazy. I think having sex again made me feel much more normal. Although, heads up for you first-time mamas: lactating decreases your natural lubrication. I wasn't expecting this, and had never needed lube before - but it made things much better for those first post-partum months (I mean year).
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#23 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 01:09 AM
 
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Although, heads up for you first-time mamas: lactating decreases your natural lubrication. I wasn't expecting this, and had never needed lube before - but it made things much better for those first post-partum months (I mean year).
YES!!!! And don't try KY!!!! Get astroglide or a sample pack from someplace, to try out different ones. The difference between something like astroglide and KY is so amazing.
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#24 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 01:15 AM
 
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My problem is I feel so unattractive right now that it really puts a mental block on me sometimes
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#25 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 02:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My problem is I feel so unattractive right now that it really puts a mental block on me sometimes
Hey hey now, hot mama! Don't MAKE me give you the pep talk that I had to be given last week!

PM me!
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#26 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 02:25 AM
 
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I am sure a pep talk wouldn't hurt me or the other mamas.
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#27 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 02:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am sure a pep talk wouldn't hurt me or the other mamas.
Tomorrow I am on that like white on rice.
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#28 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 02:42 AM
 
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maybe 4-5 times a month throughout the pregnancy. I am up to it more now, but we are so poor we can't even afford razors, and i am just not willing to be touched anywhere unshaved!
I used to get a really tight unconfortable painful feeling on my uterus when I had an "O", but it isn't happening anymore. I don't know when it stopped, it just isn't happening anymore, so that fear of pain is gone and I think it makes it easier to get in the mood.

Another thing my boyfriends stubbles, mustache, beard etc doesn't feel good like when I am not pregnant, my nerves seem to be working different and things that would give me chills make me ickie.
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#29 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 02:43 AM
 
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I don't know why but with DD I felt very unattactive. With this one I feel pretty. But I was also in high school with DD and was wanting to do all the things my friends were.
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#30 of 53 Old 01-25-2007, 03:46 AM
 
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YES!! My libido just hasn't ever stopped working!!
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