Do you ever feel alone? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 12-30-2012, 07:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I believe in eating traditional foods, and we have gotten much more consistent with it.  The only thing that is hard is that we are the only ones around that eats this way.  Most people think I'm just completely off my rocker to drink raw milk, sprout my grains, make everything from scratch, etc.  I feel that relationships are a higher priority, so there are times that we don't eat well because it's just too hard when we are spending time with people.  I'm also on My Fitness Pal (for exercise accountability), and while I have a great community of encouraging mamas on there, I am the ONLY one that eats the way I do.  Most people focus more on vegan/vegetarian/plant proteins and think that the way I'm eating is awful.  What do you do to overcome this?  I tend to just focus on researching more so that I can "defend" my way of eating, but why do I feel like I need to defend it?  I have struggled with consistency because of the fact that I'm so alone in this.  Anyone else feel this way?

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#2 of 8 Old 12-31-2012, 06:12 AM
 
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Hello, I'm sorry you feel alone in your diet. When I socialize with people who do not share my values and preferences, in diet or in any other respect, I select an experience we can enjoy together. In other words, something we have in common. I don't sacrifice my preferences and values in order socialize just as I wouldn't expect someone else to sacrifice theirs in order to spend time with me.

 

I also follow the rule of avoiding contentious subjects in social settings: religion, politics, money, diet, family relationships - they are generally off-limits in social conversation.

 

If I want to discuss something like that I do it online, as you describe. I think that personal relationships can be much easier in this time since we have the anonymity of internet to round out our social networks.

 

I don't know if the Weston Price foundation has a forum that you could join. Perhaps joining a few additional online communities would give you more of a sense of support.

 

Best Wishes to you

Puma

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#3 of 8 Old 01-03-2013, 01:54 PM
 
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I can sympathize with you! I don't know anyone else in real life who follows a traditional diet. Some people do think we are a bit crazy or maybe stupid. We homebirth too, so that really compounds the weirdness ;). I've had nurses in church confront me because they were worried about our family drinking raw milk.  My father-in-law insists we are going to get heart disease because of all the whole milk, butter, lard and eggs we consume. My husband and I also feel that relationships are important so we don't make a fuss about our eating habits when we are in social eating situations. If we are at someone's house for dinner, we just eat what they serve. At pot lucks or barbeques we just try to make the best choices we can. We figure that we are eating well the majority of the time, so one dinner every once in a while shouldn't make a huge dent in our health. When conversations about food arise, I do try to respectfully explain why we eat the way we do.  Plant based diets are so trendy right now, I've gotten in a few heated debates with friends who are vegan, but I try to avoid that. I do find it helpful to have research and facts in mind to share. The Healthy Home Economist has some great current info on her blog. I don't really feel like I have to defend or prove to others that this way of eating is better, above all, I just know that my family IS healthier because we feel so much better eating this way. That's all I need. You may be able to find a local chapter of the Weston A. Price Foundation through their website, I know mine will sometimes meet to watch videos or discuss books, but even just chatting through e-mail is nice.
 


Wife to my True Love since 8/03, Mom to DS 9/06, DS 5/08, DD 6/10, DS 11/11, and one on the way!

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#4 of 8 Old 01-05-2013, 01:41 PM
 
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I can sympathize as well, I dont know anyone else who eats like we do either, and even a few friends who are sort of on the same track, at least with eating organic, are still critical, and try to defend their dietary choices to me.  What bothers me is that many of them come to me for advice, I tell them my opinion, and then they get very defensive about their choices, which I dont understand because they are the ones who came to me, and I am always very careful not to criticize and I try to point out things I think they are doing right.  Well anyway, we also home birth and cloth diaper and all that good stuff, making us extra wierd as well, and I have found that some friends have even become uncomfortable around us and no longer want to hang out.  It does upset me, because it makes me feel even more alone and like I am an outcast or a freak.  I will sometimes sacrifice my WAPF diet depending on the cirumstances, but never for like McDonalds or something.  Sometimes if a friend invites me over, I say Oh good I just made a huge pot of chili or a roast or something, I'll just bring that!!  So we oftentimes get out of having to eat poorly just by me bringing something myself.   But since many friends have decided not to hang out as much, it hasnt been as much of a problem :(

People who know about us drinking raw milk or me taking raw liver for prenatal vitamins really think it's their business to tell me how wrong I am.  I don't tell anyone their choices are wrong, but people are more than willing to criticize mine, I do not get it :/

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#5 of 8 Old 01-11-2013, 02:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh yeah, we had 2 homebirths (out of our 3 children) as well ;-).  I'm also training to become a childbirth educator.  We make (most) of our own personal care products, make our own cleaners and detergents, etc.  We are just completely out on left field to most people ;-).  I'm fine with it at this point... I was just "having one of those days."  Typically, I don't talk much about it with my friends because we have lots of other things in common.  It's not typically an issue... but I run into people who think that homebirth is completely dangerous, we're all going to get sick from the raw milk, and making my own deodorant is just disgusting (though I don't use the home made all the time, I'm getting there).  OH!  And we have backyard chickens, which in the area where we live, is really odd!  Gardening is pretty trendy right now, so that's not a huge issue. 
Anyway, thanks for your input!  I'm fine right now... I just had some interesting conversations with people a few days in a row that made me feel like the outsider (part of it was that I was PMSing!).  Today I'm proud of it :-). 

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#6 of 8 Old 01-11-2013, 02:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh yeah, we had 2 homebirths (out of our 3 children) as well ;-).  I'm also training to become a childbirth educator.  We make (most) of our own personal care products, make our own cleaners and detergents, etc.  We are just completely out on left field to most people ;-).  I'm fine with it at this point... I was just "having one of those days."  Typically, I don't talk much about it with my friends because we have lots of other things in common.  It's not typically an issue... but I run into people who think that homebirth is completely dangerous, we're all going to get sick from the raw milk, and making my own deodorant is just disgusting (though I don't use the home made all the time, I'm getting there).  OH!  And we have backyard chickens, which in the area where we live, is really odd!  Gardening is pretty trendy right now, so that's not a huge issue. 
Anyway, thanks for your input!  I'm fine right now... I just had some interesting conversations with people a few days in a row that made me feel like the outsider (part of it was that I was PMSing!).  Today I'm proud of it :-). 

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#7 of 8 Old 01-11-2013, 02:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh yeah, we had 2 homebirths (out of our 3 children) as well ;-).  I'm also training to become a childbirth educator.  We make (most) of our own personal care products, make our own cleaners and detergents, etc.  We are just completely out on left field to most people ;-).  I'm fine with it at this point... I was just "having one of those days."  Typically, I don't talk much about it with my friends because we have lots of other things in common.  It's not typically an issue... but I run into people who think that homebirth is completely dangerous, we're all going to get sick from the raw milk, and making my own deodorant is just disgusting (though I don't use the home made all the time, I'm getting there).  OH!  And we have backyard chickens, which in the area where we live, is really odd!  Gardening is pretty trendy right now, so that's not a huge issue. 
Anyway, thanks for your input!  I'm fine right now... I just had some interesting conversations with people a few days in a row that made me feel like the outsider (part of it was that I was PMSing!).  Today I'm proud of it :-). 

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#8 of 8 Old 01-11-2013, 02:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Sorry, accidentally replied several times :-).

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