What is going on? Sleep regression? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 07-15-2009, 02:41 AM - Thread Starter
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DS has always had some sleep issues, but I think all kids run into some sleep issues at some point or another. Usually, I can figure out the culprit, and either eliminate the issue, or know that it'll end in a couple of days.

But I'm starting to worry about this new regression.

We moved into a new place 3-4 weeks ago now. I figured that it would take some settling in for him, but he was golden for the first week. Then something snapped. He starts shaking his head violently, indicating "NO" when it's bed time.

Also note, he's turned into such a creature of routine since 11 months, that this is really out of the ordinary. Even during some other issues, like teething, a bout of sickness, he still stuck to his routine.

So, we dealt with that; one of us would just go to bed in our bed. No issue. We part time co-sleep anyhow (he goes to bed so early that we put him in his own room, when he wakes up in the middle of the night, he comes into our bed for the remainder of the night). And now, two weeks later, even that's not working.

Bedtime has become a fight. I dread it, when I'm home. I work in the evenings, and late, and I can't tell you how many times I've come home to the place destroyed because he's over tired, and when he gets overtired, he destroys things. I don't care about the things being destroyed, it's just like he gets into this zone, becomes another child, and tornadoes around the room. Even when he's falling asleep, he fights himself awake, and yells at the person, because they were making him sleep.

Nursing doesn't even work 100% of the time. It works off and on, and it's still my lifesaver and sanity on the longer nights, but it's not working like it used to.

We've tried everything from sleeping in his room with him, to putting a different light in there, to playing with him more frequently in his own room, to just switching over to co-sleeping 100% of the time. Nothing is working. We get him flailing, yelling, mad, and then we end up drained, frustrated, and helpless.

Our nights have gone from peaceful bedtimes at 8pm, to this insane routine of overtiredness, helplessness, and frustration for all of us. He usually doesn't go to bed now until close to 11, or 12. And, I would be okay with this, if he was actually sleeping the usual 12 hours he sleeps when he goes to bed at 8. The later he goes to bed, the earlier he gets up. For instance, this morning, he was in bed at 1am, up at 4am to feed, slept on and off, nursing until 5:30, and then up for the day. He's cranky all day, he refuses to nap, and finally crashes midday, even then protesting all the while, though mildly.

So what is it? What do I do? Is it food? Is it a phase? Is there anything I can do? I feel like I've stretched myself, and I'm starting to feel like a bad mom. I just want to help him. I want to make this okay, and find out what's going on, but the longer it goes on, the more helpless I feel.
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#2 of 3 Old 07-15-2009, 10:50 AM
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mama. My DS has ALWAYS faught (is that the word?) sleep, so it is nothing new for us. He, too, does the "no" shaking when it's time for bed..

For us, what works is a DARK, QUIET room when he gets tired, with white-noise and black-out curtains. We nurse laying down, and then when he starts rolling, crawling all over the bed, I sit on the bed and hold him and rock/bounce. He fights it most of the time, but we just keep doing it until he calms down. Usually once he calms down he will ask to nurse again, and then I lay down and nurse him and he goes to sleep. This can take anywhere from 15-60 minutes. I just have to make up my mind not to give up until he is asleep. Frustrating as it is, he is like your DS and if he doesn't get sleep he is cranky and wakes up earlier (usual wake-up time is 6, so any earlier is just hell).

Hope you find something that works for you. We had to change our 'routine' several times before finding this one. And it has always had to be a combination of things to get him to sleep, no one thing has ever worked by itself.

good luck!

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#3 of 3 Old 07-15-2009, 06:20 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks, it's nice to know it's not just me. I just wish there was a switch I could flip to make this all better. It's got to be just as frustrating for him as it is for DH and I.
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