My kids have both co-slept until about 4 or so (so my daughter still frequently comes over to our bed, although she falls asleep in hers). However, we've always had a "kid bedtime". Going to sleep as a family just wasn't what we wanted, although we loved co-sleeping. The evening is for us to unwind, have some alone time, kid-free time, whatever. So, I would breastfeed my kids to sleep, and get back up when they were out. At the young toddler age it did take longer (an hour or so), but as they grew up a bit, they would fall asleep and stay asleep, usually waking up again when I came back into bed for my own bedtime. I think the idea of co-sleeping, breastfeeding or any other parenting thing really is "if you resent it, change it". Well, that worked for me!