Join Date: Aug 2010
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I'm Rach, full-time mama and part-time doula. I love my city life with Mr. J , Little J (05/03/10), and brand new Baby V (02/11/13)!
I'm confused. First you say that when you put him down he immediately wants to be back up in your arms and that he always wants to be held, but later you say when you hold him he pushes off you and wants to get back down. Can you clarify?
Also, FWIW, all of my kids, two were crib babies and two were cosleeping babies, went through a weird stage at around a year old where bedtime and naps suddenly became intense. They didn't want to go to bed. They knew it was time to sleep and they didn't want to. So I don't think what you did in the past really has anything to do with that.
Secondly, my second baby was just as you described yours to be. Very colicky, very upset, etc....DH and I would take turns bouncing him for hours at night just to get the crying to stop. He ended up being just like yours in that he would push away from us, wanted out of our arms, etc and just to be put down in that crib. He would fling himself toward it and arch his back in the direction of it, just because that's where he wanted to be. The crying didn't stop there but it was far, far less and he would wind down quickly (we stayed in the room with him, on the bed or something, because any contact from us like patting or rubbing him only made him more upset). He wanted his space, for whatever reasons. He also was a terrible cosleeper because he didn't want to be in that bed with us.
Anyway, long story short, he's a perfectly well adjusted kid now in spite of being so unhappy that first year. My thoughts are to give your baby what he needs during the day-the attachment, the cuddling, etc., and then give him what he needs at night, which in both our sons' cases seems to be very limited physical contact. Perhaps the holding, rocking, etc was too overstimulating for them when they were already so tired.
Catie - Happy wife to Aaron (01.05), mama to Liam(08.08), and Ian (11.10)! and due Feb 2013 with blessing #3!