If I never actively nightwean will it happen by itself eventually? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 10-20-2010, 12:02 PM - Thread Starter
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Maybe the title sounds strange to some, but 18mo cosleeping BF-ing DD is still happily nightnursing and I just don't want to take that away from her. It can be hard on me since I haven't STTN in 18 months, and she wakes probably 2-5 times a night to nurse. But I guess I feel like it feels right to me to do CLW, and in that same vein CL (night) weaning too...But since many of my friends with similar age LOs are or have nightweaned at this point, I do sometimes wonder and worry about the future if I leave it up to DD to decide when to stop. Any advice or BTDT on this?

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#2 of 7 Old 10-20-2010, 12:20 PM
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I would love to know the answer to this also. My son is almost 27 months old and still wakes an avg of 2 times a night to nurse (we don't co-sleep).
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#3 of 7 Old 10-20-2010, 12:23 PM
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Well, this may not be the news you want to hear, but DS who will be 4 in January, is *mostly* nightweaned. He will wake up and want to nurse once in the night about once or twice a week. I would say he started this routine not much after he turned three. IME, it's much different from when he was younger. He'll nurse for minute or two, and I can gently say, "It's time to roll over on to your pillow", and he'll happily let go and go back to sleep. I could probably completely nightwean, but I've started working full time, and I feel on those nights, he's just looking for the little extra connection that nursing provides.

ETA: We have a family bed. Also, I guess some would say that suggesting he roll over is, in fact, weaning, but if for some reason he wants to keep nursing, I keep nursing him.
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#4 of 7 Old 10-21-2010, 12:51 AM
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There was a similar thread a few months ago and I also wanted to know the answer to that. I think it was back in mid July, titled "30 month old nursing/cosleeping." You might want to check it out.

I am in the same situation you are in. My DD just turned 2 and still nurses at night, anywhere from 2 to 5 times; if often, it's usually in the early morning hours. Nurses to sleep as well.

There are some nights DD rolls back to sleep without nursing if she knows that I am there (we co-sleep) and some nights she nurses like crazy. I never know what sets her off, but there must be a reason for it???? I read about many mamas who nightwean, and I just can't do it. DD loves nightnursing too much and it's such a comforting thing for her. I keep hoping that as long as I have created a safe environment for her (not get upset or resent her), she will eventually move on on her own.

I haven't STTN in over 2 years, but I tend to function fairly well with bits and pieces of sleep. A friend of mine had a harder time with lack of sleep that she finally had to do something about it. We all want to do what is instinctively right for the child, but it's not easy, I know. Hang in there!
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#5 of 7 Old 10-21-2010, 12:59 AM
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Nope. You'll have to go to college with them 'cause they won't be able to sttn.

Sure they'll nightwean. It just seems like they won't. Age varies greatly, but from the number of nursing toddlers I've known the average seems to fall between 18months and 3yrs.

My dd mostly sttn as a rule except when teething. Her last night nursings were just after 2 when her last 2yr molars were coming in.

Ds is 2 now and often, but not always, nurses at night. He'll have a week or so where he sleeps 6+ hour stretches every night and I start getting my hopes up... then he goes back to waking up a couple of times a night.

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#6 of 7 Old 10-22-2010, 03:05 AM
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I can't answer your question, but if you want to try it, nightweaning may not be the big ordeal that it sounds like. DD is 19mo and a couple months ago she was having an early morning nurse-a-thon and I got tired of it so I said, fine, we're getting up, and expected her to crawl all over me until I dragged out of bed. But she played for a few minutes and just went to sleep next to me! And then it kept happening. If she cries I still nurse her, and I usually nurse her when she wakes just not all the way to sleep, but I think she's slowly nightweaning. We have certainly cut out the 5am-6am session that was driving me crazy. It's not really on her own since it is me setting limits, but it's not a no more nursing line in the sand ordeal with lots of crying.

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#7 of 7 Old 10-23-2010, 01:10 AM
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nightweaning seems to be happening naturally for my 19 month old.. for a while he was waking up at 2 or 3 am to nurse , but now it's more like 6 am.. (however we do the long go to bed nursing, probably at around 10 or even sometimes 11 pm ) .. we mostly co-sleep - though sometimes he spends the whole night in his toddler bed. If he wakes up from the toddler bed and climbs into our bed, he defnitely wants to nurse, but if he sleeps the whole night in our bed, he doesn't wake up to nurse - it's defnitely about emotional comfort... i do think it's happening naturally.. (of course having a glass of water next to the bed if he's thirsty seems to be helpful as well ) i do not have the heart for nightweaning, if he cries, i just give him mama milk, it's too heartbreaking. Offering rice milk might be helpful - but we havn't really even needed to try that yet as i am ok with nurseing once in the morning, once for naptime and then maybe around 6 pm, and always before bedtime.. (4x mostly) and this is all occuring naturally, he eats alot of food now, and if he wants to nurse alot - it usually means he needed to eat more "real food" . .hungy guy will try to nurse alot more, IF he didn't eat a good dinner , so i have to make sure he eats a very well rounded meal, then his need for milk defnitely corrosponds.

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