Baby won't stay asleep without me right there. - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 08-10-2011, 08:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello!  Well, the good news is that we started cosleeping a few months ago, and it's great.  DS starts the night in his crib (in our room) around 7:30, and then usually comes into bed with us around 9 or 10 at his first waking.  

 

The new problem we're having now is that once we get him down into his crib, he wakes up every 20 or 30 minutes until I finally give in and go to bed with him.  This means I get to spend no time with my husband.  :(  

 

Should I suck it up and invest in a good book light so I can just have a 7:30 bedtime with DS?  

 

Or should I keep trying to get the little guy to stay asleep for a bit longer on his own?  We're not trying to transition him to the crib full time or anything, we're both happy to cosleep with him as long as he likes, we'd just like a few hours before we go to bed!  

 

Or, has anyone tried just holding the baby and letting them snooze while you hang out in the living room in the evening?  DS is obviously tired and ready for bed at 7:30ish, so I don't want to keep him up with us, but maybe he could sleep in the living room and then he'd be reassured by seeing us and hearing us when he flutters awake for a moment?  

 

Any suggestions?  

 

I feel like nighttime parenting is the very hardest part about parenting!  

 

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#2 of 5 Old 08-10-2011, 11:52 PM
 
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Had this exact same issue and i went the book light route. Got a lot of reading done in the last 15 months! While I am an advocate of attachment parenting and co-sleeping, I am missing having some time alone in bed with my hubby or even to stretch out alone. My toddler is huge and our queen sized bed is getting smaller and smaller. I also haven't found any info on transitioning a toddler to sleeping in her own bed at night. I want to do this whenever she fully weans. Good luck!
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#3 of 5 Old 08-11-2011, 06:12 AM
 
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YES to "nighttime parenting is the hardest thing about parenting" (a LO, anyway--DS1 is almost 16, and, let me tell you--that's a different kind of hard).  And, for a time, perhaps "yes" to the book light idea.

 

My DS2 (now 16 months) went through a couple month phase where he'd do exactly what you describe.  It drove me nuts.  I would brush my teeth, pee, try to do dishes, or whatever, when...yup, he's up again, pretty much every 20-30 minutes.  I would usually just give up around the 3rd or 4th time (or, if I was tired enough, the 2nd) and lay down with him for the rest of the evening.  It did eventually end.  We still co-sleep, BTW.  I think they just sense we are gone and are at an age where that just doesn't feel okay to them.  If he is unwell for any reason, he will occasionally still do this (he did it last night since he's running a fever).

 

And advice?  Other than "this too will pass"?  Honestly, when I was totally fed up with it, I would occasionally remind myself how I would feel about repeated waking if, for some awful reason, he was no longer with us.  I would imagine I'd do anything to get the opportunity to nurse him back to sleep every 20 minutes.  Dark thought, but it did help.  Good luck to you!


 sleepytime.gif I got tired of my signature, but I still love my children and husband and miss my little brotherkid.gif

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#4 of 5 Old 08-13-2011, 07:46 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My book light arrived in the mail today.  It's a nice one.  ROTFLMAO.gif

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#5 of 5 Old 08-14-2011, 12:37 PM
 
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Currently having same issue with 12 week old DD2, although at least her preferred bedtime is currently around 8.30 so I've got a bit of time first.  I do miss spending time with DH though.  I mostly go online (laptop) or listen to audiobooks with headphones.  When I feel frustrated I remind myself that I should be grateful, at this age with DD1 I was up till midnight bouncing on the yoga ball for hours while she cried, at least this time round its peaceful lol.gif

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