I have a friend new to AP parenting with her new little bub. But she also has two children from a previous marriage, ages 12 and 14, with whom she did CIO. She is feeling terribly guilty about it now, though her kids seem fine. She asked me for a recommendation on any reading she could do about how it is possible to move on with an attached relationship after actively pursuing CIO. Does this bring any readings to mind for you? She has enjoyed Liedloff's "Continuum Concept" and is rather philosophically-minded.
Distraction is not the same thing as play.
Be part of the diaper free revolution.
DS1, 6 years. DS2, 4 years. DS3, brand new! (April 2012)
I have to assume her "CIO" years are far in the past and not having a lot of impact on her current relationship with her children.
If she is interested in establishing a closer connection with her pre-teen/teen children, there are several authors that speak more to parents of older children. One great author is Adele Faber and a good book to start with would be "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk"
Is there any particular part of her relationship with her children she wants to work on most? An additional resource would be simply asking on the Pre-Teens & Teens board here and ask what people do to keep a strong attachment with their older kids.