kid deciding to STTN in own bedroom - what age? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 10 Old 12-16-2012, 12:28 PM - Thread Starter
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i realize every kid will be really different on this, but if you have done any aspects of family bed and let your kid decide when to move out...  at what age did your kid(s) decide to start sleeping all night in their own bed/bedroom?


my DD is 2.5, and we have done a combo of cosleeping/bed-sharing and sleeping in her own bedroom (for at least parts of the night). she spent the last several weeks falling asleep in her bedroom, and then coming to our bed around 11 pm, and sleeping the rest of the night with us. we weren't sleeping well (she whines/cries/thrashes for a long time after getting in bed and then kicks DH all night long in her sleep), so we moved her to a "nest"/cot on the floor of our bedroom about a week ago.  she transitioned without an iota of complaint.  


so now she falls asleep in her bed/bedroom, and comes to our bedroom around 11 pm, and spends the rest of the night in her nest/cot on our floor.


just curious about when others' kids decided to STTN in their own bedrooms. i'm not expecting her to for a while yet, but thought i'd ask.  thanks!

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#2 of 10 Old 12-16-2012, 03:14 PM
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My DS started to often prefer his own bed from about 4 1/2. Now he is 6 1/2 and almost always wants to sleep in his own bed.

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#3 of 10 Old 12-18-2012, 02:19 PM
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My DD will be 4 next month and I am still waiting!! 



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#4 of 10 Old 12-18-2012, 02:33 PM
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Between 2 and 6. 

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#5 of 10 Old 12-20-2012, 10:59 AM
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Mine were around 4-5. I think they probably would have been completely done by age 6. They went through some serious and repeated traumas until 2009 (ages 10 and 8) and continued to co-sleep for about another year after life stabilized, but only dd11 will still come in now and only if she's really sick.

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#6 of 10 Old 12-21-2012, 06:34 PM
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Still wondering that at 5, myself.

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#7 of 10 Old 12-21-2012, 06:44 PM
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ds1 didn't have his own bed or room until we moved right before he turned 3.  We started putting him to bed in his own room as soon as we had it set up, we didn't really present it as a choice, but he had no objections.   He rarely comes into our room in the night.  When he does wake up and wants help, he usually just screams until  one of us wakes up and comes into his room.  This happens rarely.  It was a pretty smooth transition, aside from right after his little brother was born.

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#8 of 10 Old 01-21-2013, 08:24 PM
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I have an 8 yo and a 6 yo in bed with me right now.


Our 8 yo has slept in her own room a handful of times, but most of those times ended up in bed with us in the middle of the night. She's starting to exert some more independence. She's kind of getting to that stage where I embarrass her in front of her friends  :).   I'm thinking sometime in the next 12 mos she'll decide to sleep in her own room.


We told them both that when they lost their first tooth, they'd need to start sleeping in their own rooms. We figured that was a good milestone. However, when that day came for both of them, they weren't ready and TBH, I wasn't either. I know our co-sleeping days are numbered and I'll truly miss sharing this special time with them.

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#9 of 10 Old 01-26-2013, 08:13 PM - Thread Starter
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update - three nights now of DD opting to sleep in her own bed/room all night.  NOT expecting this to last, but the uninterrupted sleep has been amazing!!!   thanks for the responses everyone - it's been helpful to hear more about your experiences of a typical age range.

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#10 of 10 Old 01-26-2013, 09:14 PM
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That's wonderful!  I'm glad you are feeling well rested right now!  I think it honestly varies from kid to kid and lifestyle to lifestyle.  For example, I worked full-time from the time my oldest was 6 weeks until she was 4.  She NEVER slept in her crib, not even once.  And when she turned 4 I got married and became a stay at home mom.  All of a sudden she didn't need my bed anymore and was happy and content in her own bed.  My middle child was in my bed every night from birth to just before age 3.  Her sister came when she was 3 and she crept back into my bed.  I finally moved her out for good at 3 1/2.  My youngest child got her own bed and started the night in there around 2.  Before that she was 100% in my bed.  She just turned 5 and she's still coming in my bed every single night.  I keep attempting to reason with her and make her understand the reason she has a bed but she's not hearing it.  She actually told me that straight up once.  I said, "I need you to go back to your own bed like sisters do.  You are a big girl.  Why do you need to sleep with me tonight?"  Her answer?  "Because I'd be so much happier in your bed!!!!!!"  *sigh*  Climb in kid.  I can't argue with that.


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