I need help figuring out how to sidecar co-sleep with this bed frame that we have.
My husband was initially a bit nervous about co-sleeping, but I brought him around and now he agrees it's best. However, he is not comfortable having a baby in bed between us. I totally respect that. My MIL, very sweetly, bought us an Arm's Reach co-sleeper, and although it is not my first choice (first would be baby in bed, second would have been sidecaring a crib), I am touched at the gesture and glad she's supportive. I'm glad to have the choice of having a baby close in a way everyone can be comfortable. Here's the problem: we recently ordered a bed frame for our king size mattress, and once it was assembled, it was clear that the standard set-up with the sidecar wasn't going to work. There's a lip of about 2.5-3 inches, all the way around, so the sidecar would not abut the mattress like it's supposed to. I'm having a hard time describing that, so I've added a photo of my side of the bed:
Hopefully that clearly illustrates the dilemma! Obviously, I fully intend to still co-sleep with the baby, but obviously it's imperative that it's done safely (ie not shoving a rolled up blanket between the sidecar and the mattress, for example), and hopefully in a way that involves getting some use out of the sidecar ... for my IL's budget, that was a giant extravagance I don't want to hurt anyone by turning my nose up at it!
What about this: put the crib frame and bed frame flush together and at the same height. Then, slide the crib mattress next to your mattress (a few inches of it will rest on top of the bedframe lip). With this, you will have a gap on the side that baby is not sleeping on, since baby will be cuddled up next to you. At our house, we've shoved some plumber's foam (like a pool noodle but thinner) in that far gap (. A very snuggly rolled sheet, towels, blanket, etc. might also work.)
I was going to say what ^^ said, just shove mattresses together and fill in the gap.
Honestly though, if I had a co-sleeper, I would use it in the beginning. My reasoning for not getting one was because I felt it was too expensive and I would end up side-carring the crib anyway. The baby would outgrow the co-sleeper so fast but hey, if somebody bought me one I totally would use it.
Ditto the above suggestions. We have a sleigh bed with a bulky frame, and it works great. One tip: We used a ratcheting tie-down strap from the auto-parts store. Hook one end to the frame of the crib (under the crib mattress, in the center), run the strap between your mattress and box spring, and hook the other end to the bottom edge of your mattress. That way, the setup will stay nice and tight. If you just hook the bed frames together, your mattress can slide and create gaps.