Family bed to toddler bed to own do you make the change... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 03-07-2014, 02:51 PM - Thread Starter
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My almost 2.5 year old has this routine:

nurse, delach, cuddle in rocking chair, placed in her toddler bed to start sleeping

- wakes up 3 hours or so later, I will rerock or if I'm in bed- bring her to bed and she falls asleep (no nursing)

- wakes up at 2am or so- wants to nurse, I say no (we have night weaned mostly), she asks for a snack, I give in and let her have plain nuts and water, we rock.. fall asleep and return to family bed.

- she nurses at 4:30am and we wake up at get up for the day....sometimes there is a nurse at 5:50am...


I am finding our queen bed is getting crowded and my body is aching due to ackward positions while sleeping to accommodate her.  I work full time as a teacher so it has been difficult to make any changes until a natural break - spring break is coming up.

I know if I cosleep with her in a single bed I could probably slip away--- buuuut wouldnt' she just wake up again???


hubby will not allow for a single bed to be placed beside our bed or in our room.  She has a room on the next floor down (only option)- with a single bed- dressed and almost ready to go......


Should she be 100% weaned before transitioning to her own bed?  Should I just keep on trying to place her in her toddler bed in our room (like a crib missing one side on the lowest setting)?  She tends to fuss and cry if placed in that bed awake ever....


Anytime I try to make a change it results in me staying up rocking with her while she cries and settles back down.......

I cannot co-sleep in the toddler bed as it can't handle an adult and toddler in there!!


We try to do attachment style parenting ----- but now where do we go from here???

- also- single bed mattress on our floor is not an option as we have active husky dogs that take up the floor space!!



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#2 of 3 Old 03-09-2014, 07:40 PM
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Gosh I don't know. Anyone out there have any advice?
Hugs to you!
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#3 of 3 Old 03-17-2014, 02:28 PM
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Hubby will not allow for a single bed to be placed beside our bed or in our room.  She has a room on the next floor down (only option)- with a single bed- dressed and almost ready to go......


Why not?  It couldn't possibly be any worse than having her in the bed with you now...Can the dogs sleep somewhere else for awhile? If he's adamant he wants her in her own space (understandable, she's certainly old enough), you may just want to skip the toddler bed and use a twin sized mattress on the floor and do the nurse/roll away thing and just get her used to sleeping in a different room...the reason why I say skip the toddler bed is that you can't start her off sleeping with you in a bed that small, but twin size might be doable.


When we were faced with transitioning DS 1 out of the family bed into his own room (because I am also a teacher and could not get enough sleep with him in the bed with me), we did a crib mattress on the floor (and I had a twin sized airmattress that I put on the floor next to it--it wasn't the biggest room but they both fit in there.  At first I started him off sitting next to him on the crib mattress until he fell asleep, then sleeping on the airmattress next to him, so if he woke up it wouldn't be hard to get him to go back to sleep.  After a few weeks of that, I was able to get him to go hop in bed, and I'd get in mine.  Then after a bit longer, he was fine with me not sleeping in there with him...and the rest is history. 


We did this over winter break, BTW, so I had several weeks to work on it.


DS1 used the crib mattress on the floor from 2-3, then we got him a twin sized mattress.  At 4 still likes a pretty hands on bedtime routine but he sleeps fine by himself.


All of this works best if you've already night-weaned, so if you haven't you won't be able to get to the step where you're not going in there at least a few times during the night...which is a whole 'nother kettle of fish.

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