Am I creating a problem? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 01-20-2003, 03:36 PM - Thread Starter
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Seriously, I'm not sure. My son, 11 weeks, stirs sometimes in his sleep and of course I wake up immediately. When he rolls his head back and forth, I assume he's about to wake up so I feed him BEFORE he wakes up. But, now he's eating every 2 hours (at least) all night long! Should I wait until he wakes up on his own? I don't want him to cry or to be stressed, but I'm wondering if I'm training him to eat when he's just stirring around in a light sleep.

What do you do? Wait until they're awake and asking? Do they go right back to sleep then?

The way we're doing it is very peaceful, but he doesn't really eat too much and I'm just exhausted in the morning.

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#2 of 4 Old 01-20-2003, 04:18 PM
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You could always take a niogt or two and see if he goes back t sleep on his own or if he can be comforted in another way. If it isn't work just feed him, no harm done. Heck you can just try it once, the first time he wakes up and if it doesn't work you could bail then.

The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it.  We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.

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#3 of 4 Old 01-20-2003, 08:30 PM
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Your baby's behaviour sounds like my DD in that when she stirs awake, she'll start rolling her head back and forth and that's when she wants to nurse. If I am slow getting to her, she'll start to utter short staccato cries. I know if I wait much longer past that she'll actually start to cry. I'm fortunate that she only nurses once during the night, and then a couple of times in the morning before she wakes so it isn't a problem for me.

So, I'm guessing that your baby does want to nurse, but you could hold off for a few seconds, watch him, and just see what his reaction is. Sometimes I think my DD wants to nurse but she doesn't take the nipple, she just tosses her head about for a second then goes back to a sound sleep. So you could try just not offering the breast, but if he starts to get upset and it escalates I'd give him the breast right away.

Unfortunately, there is no way to "prove" that YOU created this behaviour. You can't turn back the clock and do the experiment again, YKWIM? My personal feeling is that your baby is still VERY young and his eating/sleeping patterns are hardly established and still subject to change. So I would hang in there. I honestly don't believe that you can create "bad habits" like that in a BF newborn. He'll eat when he needs to, and not when he doesn't need to. And if he just needs some comfort sucking well...that's what boobs are for too, lol.

Best of luck! Hang in there, it won't last forever I promise!!

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#4 of 4 Old 01-23-2003, 06:05 AM
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I have had this "problem" w/ DD also. In fact, I got so good at this that I wouldn't even remember waking to nurse her at night. I would wake up w/ a bb hanging out and think, "Oh, I guess we woke up to nurse at night." Recently, I've been getting tired of doing this. I want DD to learn to settle herself back to sleep w/o nursing (unless she's really hungry, of course). The last few nights, I've been holding off on nursing her right away. I wait to see if she's really awake and wanting to nurse. The first night, she started whimpering every time and I had to nurse her. The last couple of nights, she's been resettling herself more and more. I also try to nurse her frequently during the day so that she doesn't have to tank up on calories at night. This strategy seems to be working well for us even though it's slow. Good luck to you!
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