But I don't want to hold my baby while she naps. - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 01-24-2003, 03:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have another non-napping baby! I am so bummed. My first was such a great sleeper and was always well rested and happy and so was I. My second one would not sleep unless I was touching her or holding her. She spent the first year of life cranky and tired because she would never sleep. So along comes #3 and i swore I would help her have better sleep habits but alas she wakes up every time I put her down. I would love it if I could sit around all day in a rocking chair and hold her while she got the rest she needed but that just isn't possible. And really I have better things to do and go crazy if I don't get a break from physical contact for a good chuck of time (about an hour) several times a day. I want her to be able to sleep as much as she needs with out being dependant on me holding her because I just can't hold her all the time. Is there anyway to change a baby who wnats to be help all the time. I have been putting her down awake or at least once she is alseep as much as possible but to no avail. Occaisionally she will stay alseep but no more than 10 or 15 minutes.

how do I get her to sleep better? I know she needs more, longer stretches of sleep to be happy. She is seven weeks old. Jow often and how long should a baby sleep at that age? Every time i see sleep recomendations in books the give a lump some (and I know dd isn't getting anywhere close to that amount). If she hasn't had enough awake time to make sleeping restful should I wake her up. I am beginning to feel like I am short changing my kids because they just aren't getting enough sleep. I also remember the resentment I felt towards my second one for not ever sleeping (by four months she would go all day wothout a nap) and don't want to feel that way again.

The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it.  We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.

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#2 of 9 Old 01-24-2003, 04:12 PM
 
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have you tried using a sling with her? She could just sleep in the sling and you could do things you need to....

just a thought....
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#3 of 9 Old 01-24-2003, 04:29 PM
 
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A sling is a great idea.

Another idea is a stroller in the house -- you can push it back and forth when she stirs. Then leave it still when she is quiet so she can gradually adjust to laying still.

I can understand how as a mom of three you like to have some time with your hands free. Do you have a mechanical swing? Does she like it?
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#4 of 9 Old 01-24-2003, 05:12 PM
 
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My current favorites are the sling and the baby trekker. I have a vibrating bouncey and I use that when I'm cooking (too hot to have baby in sling) or when I shower. He rarely sleeps in it but it does give me a chance to do something quick. As soon as I put him in the Maya Wrap he passes out. I can then do things like put laundry away, wash dishes, come to MDC , and read to the kids or play a game with them. I can't really clean the bathrooms or anything like that but that's OK. I do that when dh is home and has him in the Baby Trekker.

Good luck and I'm with you! It is frustrating!

Amy - Blessed wife to Jesse (the best dad in the world), mother of 10 on earth plus 8 in heaven.   PROUD to be a Catholic! : winner.jpg familybed2.gifhomeschool.gif

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#5 of 9 Old 01-25-2003, 03:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I love my sling but I can't do much as far as work with it on. Because of my height (and unfortuantely width) I am forever hitting her against the counters, splashing her with water, and crunching her when i bend or stoop. Poor baby, not exactly condusive to sleep . She will be in her swing but only while she is asleep and when she wakes up in it she is really mad. i must say since I posted this yesterday she has suddenly started napping: of course. Kinda like the way they get well when you walk into the Dr. office.

Thanks for the suggestions.

The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it.  We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.

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#6 of 9 Old 01-25-2003, 03:56 PM
 
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Do you drink coffee? Or tea? Or consume any other kind of caffeine or chocolate?

Everything that i've read says that a cup or 2 of joe a day isnt going to affect the bf'd babe, and that the amount of caffeine that goes into the milk is very minimal anyways, but my son never, ever slept well until i cut out the coffee and the chocolate. Even now if i indulge, he cant nap and he gets soo grumpy. It took a couple of weeks after i quit the caffeine and chocolate for it to make any difference--he was so sensitive to it and it stayed in his little body for so long.

Just wanted to put the idea out there for you. s
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#7 of 9 Old 01-25-2003, 04:12 PM
 
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My story with dd... she took a while to learn to nap lying down. At 7 weeks, she was still napping in my arms, the baby bjorn or sling carrier, and she had just started to like to nap in the mechanical swing we got second hand. For a few months after that, the swing and sling were her favorite nap places, and we gradually got her used to her crib for naps by putting her in it for short periods of time when she was sleepy or had alreday fallen asleep while nursing. At first, she almost always woke up as soon as or shortly after we put her down, but then she began to nap in the crib for longer periods (30-45 minutes), until one day we were on a wonderful two naps a day for at least an hour each schedule! And it stuck! It takes time and persistence, but your baby, at only 7 weeks, is still on a newborn sleep schedule. In time, with some work, you will likely see her have longer naps and you will have some time to yourself. I read the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, and while I did not agree with the "Cry it out" suggestion, I did find some other suggestions in there that were helpful. Good luck!
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#8 of 9 Old 01-26-2003, 02:09 AM
 
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lilyka, I can relate! In fact, I just sat down to post a similar question. My 7 mo old dd is the same way, and I'm getting so tired of holding a 21 lb napping baby. Not to mention that I get nothing done...

I just got Elizabeth Pantley's book The No-Cry Sleep Solution, and while I have not read much of it yet, it seems like a really loving way to teach a baby to sleep by herself. I wish I'd gotten the book sooner. She has lots of ideas to choose from to suit your personal situation. I'm going to give it a try -- gosh, I hope it works! It was just published last year, so it may not be in the library yet; I got mine from Amazon.

By the way, she does advocate co-sleeping, which I think is refreshing.

Wishing you the best -
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#9 of 9 Old 01-27-2003, 03:40 AM
 
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Have you tried white noise? My dd was a horrible napper and static, vacuum cleaners, hair dryers, all worked wonders. The only practical one of these to leave on while she naps is the static. If you turn on only the receiving end of the baby mointor it makes some wonderful, clear static that can be turned up pretty loud.
SOunds strange, but I never left home without with my dd!
If I left it on while I got her to sleep and thru her entire nap, she *sometimes* would sleep long periods of time. However, I held her for most of her naps and at 28 mths she still either need to be in the car, in arms, or nursing whoops she's up HTH
Sara
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