How do I get DD to go to DH in the night? - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-22-2003, 09:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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She's 22 months old now, and has been nightweaned for many months now, though she's still in the family bed, where we hope she'll stay for a while. She'll let me comfort her in the night (it usually just takes me snuggling with her or putting a hand on her back, but if DH touches her, she gets sooooo mad! She's totally into him as soon as she wakes up, wants HIM to read her books, play with her, etc. Why won't she let him cuddle with her in the night? I nurse her to sleep, but DH lays down next to her, and she likes him there, but won't let him touch her then either. What can we do to involve DH?

Thanks!
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Old 03-27-2003, 03:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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really, no ideas? pretty please???
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Old 03-27-2003, 01:28 PM
 
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i've been waiting to read your replies. ds will NOT accept daddy at night either. its very frustrating when dh is willing but ds is not. my friend's 2 year old is the same way and says "No daddy!"
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Old 03-27-2003, 01:32 PM
 
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Sounds to me like mama=comfort, daddy=fun (not that you don't play with her too!). Our family is the same way, although dd will often snuggle up next to dh in her sleep. When she wakes though, it usually has to be me who comforts her back to sleep.

Does your dh comfort her during the day when she's upset (and he's home, obviously. I'm assuming he works out of the home during the day?)? Maybe if he took over some of the daytime comforting when possible, it would help at night. I know it's hard not to snatch your baby up when she's crying, but it's nice if your dh can do that too.

I'm making a lot of assumptions here, sorry if I'm mostly wrong. I hope something I wrote helps you!

peace, Beth
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Old 03-28-2003, 03:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks, Beth and Serenity. DH works away from home during the day, but he and DD have plenty of time together before he goes to work and when he gets home (She really just wants to hang with him when he gets home and isn't as interested in me one he's home. I think she's bored with me by then and she and Daddy have lots of fun things that they do).

She'll let DH comfort her for owies and such, not quite as much as I can comfort her, but still quite a lot. It's like nighttime is a totally different realm for her. She'll swat him away if he touches her, and get really mad if he even sings or tries to talk to her soothingly in the night. It makes him feel rotten, and it frustrates me because I want him to be able to help. I really thought that if her were a part of putting her to sleep, he'd be welcome near her in the night. She used to cuddle a tiny bit with him, but now it seems like that will never happen. She won't even let him touch her sippy cup in the night, but as soon as she wakes up, she grabs books and hands them to him to read. I just don't get it.

Thanks again....
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