Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: SHHH... I'm reading Harry Potter
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I am sorry you are so tired. I know that, for me, being tired makes it hard to have the energy I want/need to be the mother than I want to be to my children, the partner I want to be, the friend I want to me, the homemaker, etc. I am the mother of two very bad sleepers. I haven't gotten a full night's sleep in over 5 years. BUT, I am getting a lot more sleep than I use to.
First, I would recommmend the book The No Cry Sleep Solution. It has some good ideas in it. I have found that, for my children, sleep begets sleep. The better they nap, the better they sleep. Though, my now 5 yo outgrew naps at about 20 months but my almost 2 yo still takes them. We follow a VERY consistent routine for naps, at the expense of other things. Our day revolves around nap time. We also have a very consistent bedtime routine. Dinner, play, bath, PJs books, bed. My daughter did not co-sleep well so she sleeps in her crib next to my bed. My 5yo sleeps in his own bed in our room. This arrangement works for us and gives everyone maximum sleep. I would experiment with different routines/arrangements to find what works best for all of you. For my daughter, she needs to know we were there with her but she also needed her space. The quicker we respond to her, the less she is awake (if we wait to see if she'll go back to sleep, she's UP but if we pat her back or talk to her or sing to her, she'll go back to sleep). Though, honestly, this happened when I night-weaned her about 2 months ago. My partner got up with her and held her until she fell back asleep. Now, she sleeps from about 8:00 pm to 4:00 a.m and then nurses and sleeps until about 6:30. We did the same with our son.
Also, I think the 2nd year is the worst for sleep. Their whole worlds are opening up and they just can't stand to miss it by sleeping. And, they are getting lots of teeth, and those molars can be horrible.
Anyway, check out the book and see if it gives you ideas. And keep trying different things until you find something that works. I would give any change at least 3 days to see if it helps.
I hope you all get some sleep soon.