How young could siblings sleep together (alone). - Mothering Forums

How young could siblings sleep together (alone).

Hokulele's Avatar Hokulele (TS)
08:26 AM Liked: 10
#1 of 12
08-06-2008 | Posts: 1,119
Joined: Mar 2005
Right now we have one big happy family bed with all four of us sleeping together. DD#1 is 3. DD#2 is 7 weeks. DH and I sleep in the middle so the girls aren't next to each other.

Obviously I'm nowhere near ready to put the girls in a bed together alone. But I just keep thinking how cute that will be when they can move into a bed together - just the two of them.

At what age did/would you feel it is safe for them to be put together in bed without DH and/or me between them? I realize this probably varies by child a little but I'm just looking to see what others think.

They are exactly three years apart.
lerlerler's Avatar lerlerler
09:11 AM Liked: 12
#2 of 12
08-06-2008 | Posts: 1,576
Joined: Mar 2004
I'd say when the little one is actively able to get away from big sis (good crawler) and is at least half the other one's weight... . ANd ONLY if both children are "light sleepers". A big NO if you have one ofthose children who you can't wake with a fog horn.

A year? 10 months
Hokulele's Avatar Hokulele (TS)
01:15 PM Liked: 10
#3 of 12
08-06-2008 | Posts: 1,119
Joined: Mar 2005
Oooh - those are good guidelines. Thanks!

I just think it will be so cute when they can snuggle each other. And a big adventure for them if they get to be in a bed separate from us.
aept's Avatar aept
01:29 AM Liked: 0
#4 of 12
10-07-2008 | Posts: 43
Joined: Feb 2007
I am resurrecting this post since I have the same question. My boys are 21 months apart, though. I know they are not safe to sleep together unsupervised yet. The little one is only 4.5 months now and I think my 2-year-old would roll on top of him if I weren't between them. Does anyone have more thoughts on this?
Vancouver Mommy's Avatar Vancouver Mommy
02:01 AM Liked: 47
#5 of 12
10-07-2008 | Posts: 1,618
Joined: Aug 2007
I used to leave my los together for a few hours in the evening before dp and I went to bed when my ds was about five months or so. Now I'm thinking of letting them sleep together all night in their own double bed. Soon anyway, ds still nurses a thousand times a night.
aept's Avatar aept
02:38 AM Liked: 0
#6 of 12
10-07-2008 | Posts: 43
Joined: Feb 2007
Thanks, Diane.
Your DC are about the same number of months apart as mine, I see. So, your youngest is about 18 months now, right?
Vancouver Mommy's Avatar Vancouver Mommy
02:40 AM Liked: 47
#7 of 12
10-07-2008 | Posts: 1,618
Joined: Aug 2007
Originally Posted by aept View Post
Thanks, Diane.
Your DC are about the same number of months apart as mine, I see. So, your youngest is about 18 months now, right?
Yep, almost 18 months. Our plan is to move them over to their own room in the next six months. Or dp and I will quietly move over to the other room and see if they notice.
ChetMC's Avatar ChetMC
04:37 AM Liked: 0
#8 of 12
10-07-2008 | Posts: 2,547
Joined: Aug 2005
I'm sure I've read that a baby shouldn't sleep alone with another child until they are a year old. However, DH and I would get up and leave our first two kids in bed together in the morning from day one. They are 16 months apart.

We had no issues with movement though. Neither kid was a roller or a thrasher in their sleep, even though they are sound sleepers. I also didn't see older DD as a threat to the baby either. At first she would sometimes wake the baby up when she woke up, poking at her, and we had a handful of incidents where attempts to cuddle the sleeping baby were not ideal for the baby, but she learned to just get up and leave the baby alone. It's different too since I was awake in the house when the baby and toddler were alone.

I can't see us letting two kids sleep alone together in another room before one was 10 or 11 months old, and reasonably mobile. I can't imagine not sleeping with the 10 or 12 month old myself though, so it isn't something I've thought much about.

When we moved the girls to their own room I posted here about sibling beds and got very little response though. I was really hoping to hear from more moms about how they went about they process. Maybe it's really uncommon, even with MDC families. I don't know.
leximom's Avatar leximom
04:43 AM Liked: 0
#9 of 12
10-07-2008 | Posts: 3,041
Joined: Jul 2005
I felt comfortable having my two kids sleeping next to each other when my younger dd was about 10 months.

It's certainly not a thing I was striving for since the sleep never lasted long due to one of the girl poking, pulling, kicking screaming at the other waking them up. There has been very little cuddling during the few times they bedshared without me.
BonMaman's Avatar BonMaman
04:48 PM Liked: 0
#10 of 12
10-14-2008 | Posts: 412
Joined: Sep 2005
My lads are 21mo apart. I've helped them get down for naps in DS1's twin bed many times (in fact, they're doing so now), starting around the DS2 was maybe a year old or so. Sometimes, that'd be the only way DS2 would sleep any stretch of time -- to have his brother sleeping near him.

It has been our intention all along for the lads to share a bedroom. We have just moved to a new house (a couple of months ago) and set up a twin bed for DS2 that's perpendicular to DS1's twin bed (so they're head to head). They've been napping in there for a couple of weeks now :, so we hope to try out nighttime arrangements that way soon (they've been sleeping in our room since we moved in, DS1 in a twin bed in there and DS2 in his crib and/or our bed).

I think *lerlerler*'s guidelines about size, age, weight, and sleep habits are great.
hram's Avatar hram
12:55 PM Liked: 14
#11 of 12
10-15-2008 | Posts: 261
Joined: Mar 2008
My dd's are exactly 3 years apart and born in june also I have always let them sleep in the middle of the bed with me and daddy on the ends I just had to make sure my arm was around the little one because my older daughter would fling an arm or leg around. But dd #1 has been sleeping on her own mattress in our room for a few months now and is doing great (4 yrs) and dd #2 is a terrible sleeper, nursing constantly and sleeping on top of my neck and face! (16 months) So as soon as she gets sleeping better we are getting bunk beds with a full on bottom so they can share. But even if my lo slept through the night i dont know if i would let them sleep together. My older is kind of a hard sleeper, I would try it and sleep in there with them to see how they did. But even though i love sleeping with them i cant wait for them to sleep in their own room. I hope by sharing it wont be hard for either one.
deditus's Avatar deditus
02:56 PM Liked: 12
#12 of 12
10-15-2008 | Posts: 2,978
Joined: Feb 2006
For my personal comfort, I think the youngest should be 2 years old. Mainly because I know some preschoolers who are quite heavy sleepers, so I would want the youngest child to be "big" enough to hold their own.
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