DS won't go to sleep, please help, I can't take this any more - Mothering Forums

 
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#1 of 4 Old 08-09-2008, 01:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Our son is 24 months old and last few months has been a nightmare to put to sleep and to sleep with. Actually he has been like that since 6 months old, but back then it was still easy to put him to sleep. He's not nursing any more, so that is why it's impossible to put him to sleep at night.
It takes somewhere between 1-2,5 hours to put him to sleep! I am so freaking exhausted. The worst part is that he will still sleep till only 5 or 6am. He averages 8 hours of sleep a night, plus around 2 hours of nap. He seems to be tired all the time.
He has lots of food allergies, so we are gluten and dairy free, and I had to stop nursing him recently fro the same reason. He has ALWAYS been the worst sleeper BUT only when sleeping with me. I always felt sorry for him thinking he was hurting or something until one night DH decided to take him and he slept all night, with no problems at all. That was about year ago. From then it's up and down. There were months when he'd sleep in his own bed all night, then it would end and he was back with us.
The worst part now is putting him to sleep. He started to have nightmares, so it was obviously fear related, so I started sleeping with night light, which helped, but it's STILL freaking ritual to get him to bed at night.
Last night we spend with our friends outdoor, bonfire, playing with kids till 9pm. He as so happy and tired and fell asleep in the car. I was all excited that I won't have to deal with him when was get home. So we got home I transfer him to bed, he woke up just enough to not want me to leave the room so I lie there in my clothes with him for 30 minutes, need to go pee and flips out and starts screaming.
I was sooooo mad! I can't even get ready for bed! I am SO TIRED of this. By the time he actually fell asleep it was way past 11pm!! And 5am he is already pretty much up! WTF???? I can not live like this any more.

Anyone has any advice? Please, I am so exhausted. I can not do this any more. He was such an amazing sleeper first 3 months of his life! I got more sleep with him back then than I did in 3 years with my older one. Then it ended.
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#2 of 4 Old 08-09-2008, 11:39 PM
 
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My son is 20 months old and i'm 6 months pregnant...when i first got pregnant, i was so sick and exhausted, that i started laying down with him for naps, this turned into him not being able to go to sleep at all without myself or my husband laying down with him. I can completely relate to laying down forever, needing to pee or get myself ready for bed, but having to wait for my son to finally be asleep. Most nights, I end up falling asleep with him and waking up a couple hours later, mad that i've missed out on any "me time" or alone time with my hubby. And now he's back to waking up and coming to bed with us around midnight...then he lays between us kicking me for the rest of the night. My other issue is that my son refuses to be in a crib, so he's in a bed and lot's of tips that i've heard from friends, don't really work for us 'cause as soon as we try to leave the room, if he's not completely asleep, my son is up and screaming at the door!
The whole situation is exhausting and although I don't have any advice to give - I FEEL YOUR PAIN! and I'm interested to see what kind of tips arrive from this post! Good Luck! - Wendy (mom to Jacob, November 27th, 2006 & due December 1st, 2008)
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#3 of 4 Old 08-10-2008, 12:11 AM
 
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It sounds like maybe you need a good routine. Stick with it strictly for at least a month to know whether or not it helps. Don't stay out late or anything until it's all under control.
After the bedtime routine, pick him up and put him in his bed each and every time he gets out to come get you. Do it all night, every night if it takes it. Eventually he'll understand that when it is bedtime, he needs to stay in bed and sleep.
Remember, it's up to the parent to give boundaries that he might not like now but will be good for him in the long run.
Maybe you could give him an alarm clock for kids and tell him that he can't leave his room in the morning until it goes off? He can get up if he's awake and play quietly but everyone else needs to sleep. He'll probably start to stay in bed bc he won't want to be up in the dark on his own.
Good luck.:

Hannah, Wife to R , Mama to Alexander, born 2-15-08,
and Gabriel, born 10-17-11. Ask me about cleft lip and palate!
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#4 of 4 Old 08-10-2008, 12:24 AM
 
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I second the routine idea. That worked wonders for my dd and ds1. It is at the same time every day without fail and we are not typically routine/schedule people! We have had a lot easier time getting them down because they know what to expect. Bath, snack, brush teeth, story, cuddle then bed. And we also do early bedtimes- dd 8pm and ds7:30. I found that later bedtimes didn't make later mornings around here. Good luck!
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