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#1 of 12 Old 12-05-2008, 08:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I posted this in the Learning At School area and was directed here. So here's a cut and paste:


My DD is very gifted. I know that a lot of parents say that, but she's been reading since she was almost 4 and is currently working on her multiplication. I don't force her, but I don't want to hinder her either.
The problem here is this:
She is in 1st grade in public school and the teacher can't deal with her. Nobody at the school seems to be able to. She is very active (presumed ADHD) and extremely BORED. I've had several conversations with the teacher, as well as the principal, counselor, and school psychologist. They all agree that she's bright but they aren't willing to do anything to help her succeed. I've explained numerous times that she acts up because she is looking for attention, and a better education. One-on-one, she's GREAT. They all tell me that (like I didn't know), but in a classroom setting she's disruptive. She comes home from school every day telling me how she didn't learn anything. She's bored. Seriously, in first grade a child should not hate school. The other kids pick on her and she has very few friends.
The school's new answer to this is to put her in a Special Education class. To me, that doesn't seem like the answer. I've don't know much about SE classes now, but I do remember that when I was in school, the "Room 3" kids were segregated from the rest of the school. They ate lunch alone, had recess alone and never really ventured from their classroom. They were looked down upon and it made me sad. I befriended some of the kids, but I rarely got to see them.
All that aside though, are they trying to say that they think something is "wrong" with DD? Will SE really help her or will it make things worse?

Elizabeth, Proud Pagan wife, and mama to DD - 10/30/01, DS1 - 01/08/04, DS2 - 03/22/07, my twin DDs -08/08 and our new little DS3 - 06/11/10
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#2 of 12 Old 12-05-2008, 09:35 PM
 
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Has the school offered to have her be assessed by a school psychologist before putting her in special ed? Will she require an IEP? A lot of gifted kids come across as having ADHD, there should be a recommendation of a book above in the stickies about "misdiagnosis and dual diagnosises of gifted kids..."

I would demand that my child be evaluated first before she is moved anywhere. Maybe special ed would help, but it isn't okay to just move her because they are guessing, yk?

Could you homeschool at all? If it came down to it? If she is acting out, she in probably sad. I pulled my son from 1st grade, too... it was not fun to watch a 6 year-old boy have such tough days and act the way he was acting because he couldn't use his brain.


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#3 of 12 Old 12-05-2008, 09:39 PM
 
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wait, RainbowEarthFaerie, are you in p-town? If you are and your child qualifies for TAG, then it is mandated that she receive a GIEP and that there be differentiated learning for her. There is a school for gifted kids, too... I can pm you more info if you'd like.

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#4 of 12 Old 12-05-2008, 09:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yeah...I'm right outside of it. They tested/are going to test her for TAG. I signed the consent form, but haven't heard anything since. I'd love any info on a school for gifted kids.

Elizabeth, Proud Pagan wife, and mama to DD - 10/30/01, DS1 - 01/08/04, DS2 - 03/22/07, my twin DDs -08/08 and our new little DS3 - 06/11/10
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#5 of 12 Old 12-06-2008, 08:09 PM
 
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I am a teacher. I have 3 kids, 2 of whom read before the age of 3 and the other who read by age 4, precocious in lots of ways and happy and successful today as teenagers and older elementary kid.

None of mine were tagged as having anything, but I see it all the time in my work or in kids' files... If anyone is suggesting that your daughter has any condition, my advice is to take her to a child psychiatrist and have her fully evaluated. Not the school psych, a specialist in children and psychological conditions, a diagnostician who sees and treats only children. Medication is a quality of life decision IMO. If the ADHD is true and impedes her social life and learning, causes anxiety to a debilitating degree, etc, then you have that to take into consideration against the effects of meds.

Find a school for her that appreciates and nurtures the many different intelligences, not just the verbal and logical/analytical ones that public schools cater to. ADHD kids need constant and regular nature and exercise. Schools that recognize this have a much easier time, and more importantly, so do their students...
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#6 of 12 Old 12-06-2008, 08:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Private schools are not an option for us. We couldn't even dream of affording it. I would love to do that for her, but it just won't happen.

Elizabeth, Proud Pagan wife, and mama to DD - 10/30/01, DS1 - 01/08/04, DS2 - 03/22/07, my twin DDs -08/08 and our new little DS3 - 06/11/10
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#7 of 12 Old 12-07-2008, 12:31 AM
 
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If you can't afford to send her to private school, then you might qualify for scholarships. So, if there is a school that you would like to send her to, ask for scholarship info.

Timmy's Mommy WARNINGyslexic typing with help of preschooler, beware of typos
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#8 of 12 Old 12-07-2008, 01:19 AM
 
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Like carmel23 said, if you can homeschool, I'd do it unless you can get her into a gifted school. I really think schools can do a lot of damage to gifted children in a short amount of time. Even if they try to accommodate the child, a gifted child's needs will sometimes just get bigger than they can handle.

I guess it depends on how gifted she is, too. If she is profoundly gifted, then even the gifted school probably wouldn't work.

Have you seen this site?
http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/index-old.htm

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#9 of 12 Old 12-08-2008, 09:10 PM
 
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REF you sound like you are describing my dd. She too is in first grade very advanced in math and reading. I had her in a private school, thinking they would be 'helpful' I had to pull her out of school and we're going through a charter for homeschool she is thriving although her adhd'ness is still a factor at least she's not being punished for not 'conforming' by sitting with her hands folded on her desk.

If you have the inclination I'd highly recomend h/sing at least until your towns gifted program kicks in (ours starts at 3rd grade)
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#10 of 12 Old 12-09-2008, 02:16 AM
 
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I hate to sound like a broken record... but is there any chance you can homeschool her? What you're describing sounds like the main reason BeanBean isn't enrolled in a traditional school. :

Rynna, Mama to Bean (8), Boobah (6), Bella (4) and Bear (2)
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#11 of 12 Old 12-09-2008, 03:02 AM - Thread Starter
 
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She was homeschooled last year. I know that it is probably what's best for her, but I get so much pressure from other family members to keep her in school for the "social aspect." She doesn't have many friends as it is, and there are a couple of bullies that live on our block that scare her away when she plays outside. So school really is her only source of socializing with other kids.

I have a meeting with the Special Education Team next Wednesday. Hopefully I'll get my answers then. If this keeps up though, I really won't have any choice BUT to take her out of school.

Elizabeth, Proud Pagan wife, and mama to DD - 10/30/01, DS1 - 01/08/04, DS2 - 03/22/07, my twin DDs -08/08 and our new little DS3 - 06/11/10
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#12 of 12 Old 12-11-2008, 01:40 PM
 
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Quote:
but I get so much pressure from other family members to keep her in school for the "social aspect."
I couldn't help chuckling at that.

We're homeschooling. Everybody's fine. 'Nuff said.
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