Can I start a "Funny Things They Say/Amazing things they do" Thread? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 39 Old 02-20-2013, 04:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have been so enjoying the anecdotes people shared in the archives and wonder if we can have a new thread of the hilarious  and remarkable things they say. I never get to tell these little stories IRL without feeling extreme awkwardness and I LOVE hearing similar stories, it is so nice to actually be able to relate!

 

Dd is 3.5 yo...

 

This morning, I was woken up at 6:30 am by a little voice in my ear saying "Mommy?  Mommy?  Can we talk about the aurora borealis?" 

 

caffix.gif

 

She spent the afternoon dressed in her butterfly wings, "Mommy, I am breaking free of my chrysalis and am going to fly around to all of the flowers drinking nectar...I'm carrying pollen between the plants  because I am an insect helper just like the bees!"

 

My very favourite dd1 quote though has to be from when she was about 2.5 yo.  I was cranky and dropped something or broke something, I forget exactly what...and I swore under my breath.  Angelic little dd pipes up "Mama, I know you're upset, but we don't say "s***!"          

 

 ROTFLMAO.gifROTFLMAO.gifROTFLMAO.gif


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#2 of 39 Old 02-20-2013, 04:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh, and she has this remarkable recall of facts about the planets in our solar system, knows their order, knows what they are made of (which has led to really interesting conversations about states of matter), whether they are hot or cold, what their rings are made of, has an idea of how many moons they have, knows all about how they orbit the sun...knows about eclipses and why the moon changes and asteroids and comets and how the seasons change on Earth......

 

So my MIL visited very recently and this space obsession has really taken off since her last visit and she was unprepared for dd's depth of knowledge, haha....dd starts talking to MIL very matter of fact about all of these things, totally taking for granted that MIL actually KNOWS all of these things, which she didn't (and neither did I before now! The moons of Jupiter were not something I spent much time considering lol.gif)   And after awhile MIL looks at me and says "....you need to start giving me a list of required reading before I come so I can keep up"  hahahaha heartbeat.gif

 

It amazes me that she can remember all of these things...and that she is so desperate to know it in the first place!  So neat!!!


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#3 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 11:14 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Eep, I hope I'm not coming off as obnoxious, guys...jumping in and bragging (vs mama pride)  or something guilty.gif 

 

I have nobody to talk to about these things and dd is going through this immense leap right now and I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed, honestly, with nobody who even remotely understands what it's like to live with a kid like this.

 

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#4 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 04:39 PM
 
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Not at all, Katico!  I love to hear stories about what other kids are doing.  I find it interesting that so many precocious kids have similar interests.  We are currently watching Bill Nye the science guy planets.  DS loves Bill Nye!!!!  You shoud check him out for your DD, sounds like she might be into it too.

 

Funny things he's said "Ouch, Mom! I sat on a giant hot gas ball that burned my butt!  Can you guess what that is, Mom?"  That would be the sun :)

 

Also, he has "solid power" to zap the gas giant planets with so he can land his imaginary rocket and go exploring.

 

And what shocked me most recently was his reaction to a toilet paper roll art project at preschool.  He sat in the car on the way home spinning the tube around and around until I asked what he was thinking.  " This is just like infinity.  It goes around and around and around forever to forward infinity and backwards forever to negative infinity."  OK, then.  He must have hear about infinity from . . . Bill Nye?


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#5 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 04:46 PM
 
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No, not at all. Love hearing about precocious cuteness. Eventually a few people will chime in. 

 

Maybe not everyone. It's partly that many of us have kids who are older, and they aren't so cutely precocious anymore, nor does their amazing-ness come out in particular comments or actions.

 

My 10-year-old (my youngest) recited pi to 31 digits in the car the other day with some skiing friends because everyone was showing off tongue-twisters a song lyrics they'd memorized. It turned into one of those awkward moments ... they were confused because they didn't know what pi was, and when she tried to explain she used words like circumference and ratio, and her friends didn't know what those things were either, so she tried to explain those, but assumed they understood decimals and rational vs. irrational numbers, which they didn't, and she felt really awkward and so did her friends.

 

Not cute at all, and it made me cringe rather than smile inwardly as a parent. 

 

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#6 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 04:53 PM
 
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My son's up to 29 digits, Miranda... and his friends don't share the excitement either. Too bad we don't live closer; we could all get together and recite pi ;)  

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#7 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 04:57 PM
 
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My 10-year-old (my youngest) recited pi to 31 digits in the car the other day with some skiing friends because everyone was showing off tongue-twisters a song lyrics they'd memorized. It turned into one of those awkward moments ... they were confused because they didn't know what pi was, and when she tried to explain she used words like circumference and ratio, and her friends didn't know what those things were either, so she tried to explain those, but assumed they understood decimals and rational vs. irrational numbers, which they didn't, and she felt really awkward and so did her friends.

 

Not cute at all, and it made me cringe rather than smile inwardly as a parent. 

 

Miranda

Awe, I feel for her.  hug.gif  I had a few of those moments myself as a kid.  It's good that she has sibs and parents who "get" her - so important.


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#8 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 05:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh boy, awkward :(  I dread that potential scenario...already.

 

L will sometimes get really excited about something really "nerdy" and want to tell the whole world this amazing thing and she'll say something like  "Mommy, can I take this book in to preschool so I can show "little friend" this periodic table?????"   Ummm.......well honey....yes....but...be prepared for little friend not to be as blown away by it as you are....  She just has no idea yet that her friends aren't poring over these things like she does.  Awkwardness awaits 

 

 

Pranava, loved that your ds has solid powers so he can land on the gas giants, lol!  dd has pondered this problem as well!  When we first started talking about how they were made of gas she was CONVINCED she could still land on them because she had seen Elmo sitting on a cloud once on Sesame street and even though she KNEW gasses aren't solid and she would fall through a cloud, there MUST BE SOME WAY  if Elmo had done it lol.gif


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#9 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 05:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Today, I wondered if she could divvy things up so I asked her some cookie questions

 

If I had 8 cookies to share how many would we each get?

"4!"

 

If I had 6, how many would we each get?

"3!"

 

(at this point my mind is a bit blown, so I throw her an odd number)

 

What if i had 3 cookies to share? How many would we each get?

"1!"

 

Oh?  If I got 1 and you got 1, that would be 2 cookies...what about the 3rd cookie?

 

She looks at me, exasperated, and says "we're saving that cookie for LATER mommy"

 

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#10 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 08:08 PM
 
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Mine are nearly 4 and nearly 9, and the younger is definitely more quotable.

 

Recently, though, the 8yo was reading his sister's book of fairy tales, and at one point he looked up and said, "Hey, Mom! This one is by the Brothers Grimm! Just like Grimm's law!"

 

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#11 of 39 Old 02-21-2013, 08:32 PM
 
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I have a two and a half year old who "reads" and does division (all self-taught) but my proudest moment to date is this, bar none (TMI alert):

 

DD: "Look Mommy, I was naughty. I took two boobies out."

Me: "How could you have taken two boobies out? I'm here on the couch and you're there on the floor."

DD: "Oh no, I'm in trouble. The bunnies are flying back to the North Pole." 

Me: "Did you type something?"
DD: Points to computer screen 

On the screen: bb

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#12 of 39 Old 02-26-2013, 01:15 PM
 
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She looks at me, exasperated, and says "we're saving that cookie for LATER mommy"

 

ROTFLMAO.gif

As the mother of a 22 month old who is constantly correcting me, explaining things to me & frustrated with my general incompetence, I love this! lol.gif

 

I could totally see him saying this when he's a bit older.  Next time he puts me in my place, I'll have to share. winky.gif  I get quite alot of groaning and, "ugh, yes, I know Mommy..." followed by exasperated explanations.


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#13 of 39 Old 03-05-2013, 05:07 PM
 
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Our favorite was when my DS, who had just turned two at the time, was talking to my husband.

 

DS: I'm tired

DH: How can you be tired, you're two!

DS: I'm TOO tired!

 

He has been doing these little plays on words for the past year, I don't think people believe me when I tell them the things he says!

 

Also, he corrects me constantly. I feel like such a dullard sometimes...lol. Like when we were in the craft store looking at animal figures and I pointed out "a bird" and he said, "No Mommy, that's a MACAW."

 

Well excuse me.
 


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#14 of 39 Old 03-05-2013, 07:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Also, he corrects me constantly. I feel like such a dullard sometimes...lol. Like when we were in the craft store looking at animal figures and I pointed out "a bird" and he said, "No Mommy, that's a MACAW."

 

Well excuse me.
 

lol.gif Totally.  I was informed the other day, while drawing together, that I had chosen the wrong colour blue to draw Neptune, that it was all wrong and I really ought to start again.  Hmmph.  I was proud of my Neptune!! eyesroll.gif

 

 

She has started to make little rhymes to us at bedtime....so, we will say Goodnight!  And she will reply "Goodnight Meteorite!"  or "Goodnight Calcite!"  or, the best yet was last night, "Goodnight Parasite!" rolleyes.gif ROTFLMAO.gif   

 

Then, once, she replied, with a total deadpan face "Goodnight......ROSE QUARTZ!!!"  And then cracked UP because of course, rose quartz doesn't rhyme and wasn't that HILARIOUS??!!!  shrug.gif

 

Oh, little girl.  I can't even imagine life any other way,


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#15 of 39 Old 03-06-2013, 09:54 AM
 
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Katico, you are not obnoxious at all. I've enjoyed reading your stories. :)

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#16 of 39 Old 03-07-2013, 02:45 PM
 
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I agree - it's really nice hearing from some other moms of littles around here. smile.gif  DS is quite little, but the way he is wired (perfectionism, persistence, memory, sensitivity, perceptiveness, early milestones, etc.) plus gifted parents leave me feeling like he is likely gifted in his own right.

 

He is only 22 months, so his speech is still a bit choppy, in spite of using correct pronouns/verb tenses/etc. and a wide vocab (if I ever use a word he doesn't know - like "refreshing" - he is all over it, "What does that mean, Mommy???").  It's hard for me to translate the cute things he says, because so much of it depends on his little adult-like personality and delivery.

 

The other day, I sat down next to him while his stegosaurus was chomping on a houseplant.  I started to mention how some dinosaurs (like that one) eat plants, and some eat meat, when he interrupted me and said, "I know, Mommy, herbivores eat plants!"

 

We went out to dinner recently with a family friend that DS hadn't seen since infancy.  He walked right up to him, all confidence, made perfect eye contact and said, "Hi Uncle Bob! (points to everyone in turn) Name DS, name Daddy, name Mommy."  He's somehow mastered adult introductions. lol.gif 

 

During the same outing, he was hanging out with a pair of 6 year olds, talking about what kind of creatures were in the aquarium.  As they identified them, DS would chime in every so often with, "Yes, kids, that's right!"

 

Today, we realized he was missing part of his toy truck.  He turned to me and said, "No worry, mommy...think...think...THINK! Hmmm...where? I know...car!" "I think we did leave it in the car, DS. I think you're right." "Me, too." orngtongue.gif


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#17 of 39 Old 03-07-2013, 02:48 PM
 
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She has started to make little rhymes to us at bedtime....so, we will say Goodnight!  And she will reply "Goodnight Meteorite!"  or "Goodnight Calcite!"  or, the best yet was last night, "Goodnight Parasite!" rolleyes.gif ROTFLMAO.gif   

 

Then, once, she replied, with a total deadpan face "Goodnight......ROSE QUARTZ!!!"  And then cracked UP because of course, rose quartz doesn't rhyme and wasn't that HILARIOUS??!!!  shrug.gif

 

 

I used to this allll the time as a little kid - love it. smile.gif  DS is a big fan of rhyming, too - for many months now, he will amuse himself by busting out long strings of words that rhyme.

 

I also just love how fast their little minds move - anyone else getting whiplash?  We'll start a conversation about elephants, then we're talking about type of trees and then it's on to turkey bones (we looked at pictures of these weeks ago) in the blink of an eye.  I'm looking forward to him being more verbal so I can have a prayer of following these trains of thought! dizzy.gif


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#18 of 39 Old 03-07-2013, 04:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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The other day, I sat down next to him while his stegosaurus was chomping on a houseplant.  I started to mention how some dinosaurs (like that one) eat plants, and some eat meat, when he interrupted me and said, "I know, Mommy, herbivores eat plants!"

 

 

Ahhhh!  So cute!!

 

DD is in morning preschool 2 days a week and one of those days it is just her and one other little girl.  Last week on that day, the other little girl was out sick so L was there just with her teacher.  When I dropped her off, her teacher had gotten out a basket of dinosaur figures and she pulled one out and said "oooh, look at this guy! Rawr!"  L says "oh, that's a lambeosaurus." Teacher: "Oh...."

 Me: hahaha "Have fun!!!"

When I came back, there was this giant pile of every dinosaur book in the preschool, piled on the table, and they had named and researched all the dinosaurs in the bin LOL! lol.gif  Welcome to my life, teacher!

 

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I also just love how fast their little minds move - anyone else getting whiplash?  

 

Yes.  Oh my, yes. 


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#19 of 39 Old 03-07-2013, 06:12 PM
 
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Ahhhh!  So cute!!

 

DD is in morning preschool 2 days a week and one of those days it is just her and one other little girl.  Last week on that day, the other little girl was out sick so L was there just with her teacher.  When I dropped her off, her teacher had gotten out a basket of dinosaur figures and she pulled one out and said "oooh, look at this guy! Rawr!"  L says "oh, that's a lambeosaurus." Teacher: "Oh...."

 Me: hahaha "Have fun!!!"

When I came back, there was this giant pile of every dinosaur book in the preschool, piled on the table, and they had named and researched all the dinosaurs in the bin LOL! lol.gif  Welcome to my life, teacher!

 

Haha that's awesome! thumb.gif  DS has about 20 dinosaur magnets on the fridge and a handle full of toys - he's memorized the names of most of them, and recognizes them in books, etc. - although, his pronunciation is really cute - like when he says "brachiosaurus" it sounds more like "broccoli-saurus" smile.gif


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#20 of 39 Old 03-07-2013, 08:42 PM
 
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lurk.gifEnjoying these!

 

 

 

BIG sigh from DS, then "I am sooooo sick of gravity (sigh again)  I wan't to float around!"   He is so dramatic.


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#21 of 39 Old 03-11-2013, 01:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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BIG sigh from DS, then "I am sooooo sick of gravity (sigh again)  I wan't to float around!"   He is so dramatic.

 

That made me LOL!!  So funny heartbeat.gif


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#22 of 39 Old 03-11-2013, 01:29 PM - Thread Starter
 
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After a couple of weeks of insisting I join her in painting white blood cells destroying bacteria over and over and over again...

 

L: Mama, I think we should paint something pretty today!

 

Me,thinking: yes!  finally something new! 

 

L: Let's paint some pretty bacteria and blood cells!

 

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#23 of 39 Old 03-16-2013, 05:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So, her interest in microbes and blood cells has put her play doctor kit into major use around here and she is dissatisfied with her toy syringe because she knows it isn't remotely authentic.  So yesterday she asked me to show her how real needles work.  So I gave her the ipad and youtube and she sat, FASCINATED, for 45 minutes and watched nursing training videos on syringe preparation and giving injections  

 

uhoh3.gif  

 

Then today she was looking at her pretend thermometer and we were talking about the different temperatures written on it and what it would mean if your temperature was a certain number....and she jokes that it would be really funny if they put GOOGOL DEGREES on there....I was like, what?!  How does she even.....?????

 

(I asked my husband and apparently he mentioned it to her briefly a couple of months ago!!!) 

 

Then she sits down and writes googol.....1 with 100 zeros.............  

 

dizzy.gif

 

WTH child?!


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#24 of 39 Old 03-20-2013, 05:46 PM - Thread Starter
 
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All morning, DD1 went on and on and on and on...pulleys and gravity and atoms and dna and platelets and nonsense rhyming and singing songs about numbers and  blahblah.gif blahblah.gif blahblah.gif blahblah.gif

 

Then she stops suddenly, puts a hand on her forehead and says

 

"Mommy, my head is SO busy!!"

 

NO KIDDING!!!dizzy.gif


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#25 of 39 Old 03-22-2013, 10:55 AM
 
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All morning, DD1 went on and on and on and on...pulleys and gravity and atoms and dna and platelets and nonsense rhyming and singing songs about numbers and  blahblah.gif blahblah.gif blahblah.gif blahblah.gif

 

Then she stops suddenly, puts a hand on her forehead and says

 

"Mommy, my head is SO busy!!"

 

NO KIDDING!!!dizzy.gif

 

Hahaha I love this! smile.gif  DS was playing with his blocks the other day - he held them up and told me correctly, "See, Mommy? Triangle...See Mommy? Cylinder!" (that one kinda cracked me up - I'm sure I told him both of those at some point, but who knows how long ago!)

 

He also makes me laugh in his little adult voice when we are working on his 48 piece puzzles...talking to himself, saying, "Hmm...maybe this piece next? Yup! Great job!" - or if I help him a little, give him a piece or something, he says, "Oh yes, I see, I see! Of course!" or "Oh yes, I agree, thank you!" wink1.gif

 

Back to the busy brain, I jotted this partial conversation down the other day for posterity (it's typical toddler craziness, but I hardly see him slowing down!) :

 

"No, mommy, I said RAPTOR!" "Oh, you were talking about a raptor?" "Yes, Mommy - or...maybe T-Rex." "I see!" "Look, Mommy (points to his shirt) - dog shirt!" "Yes I see that DS, you picked that out to wear yesterday, I remember." "Yes, Mommy, I remember...look, the number 3!" "You see the number 3?" "Yes - oh look Mommy, eggs!  Two eggs.  I cook eggs for Daddy, too." "That's nice of you!" "Of course! Come on, Mommy, pirate puzzle!" 

AND on that note, he just jumped off the couch after eating lunch, announcing, "Come on, I have lots of work to do, Mommy!" dizzy.gif


~ Lucky wife of DH blowkiss.gifand loving mama to DS biggrinbounce.gif (04/11) ~

 

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#26 of 39 Old 03-22-2013, 11:03 AM
 
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My 12-year-old made me laugh the other day. I commented that he could stand to be a little more chivalrous and he responded with...

 

"Chivalry is part of a Knights code. If you want Chivalry, then I get a sword."

 

Note to self, get the boy a sword.

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#27 of 39 Old 03-25-2013, 03:29 AM
 
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These stories are cracking me up.  I have so many that I am not sure where to begin.  DS is 6, and we had many discussions on politics and voting, and the checks and balances of the current governmental system in the US (along with side commentary and analysis on the Political process in the Star wars universe).  One day I get a call from his 1st grade teacher.  They have been writing about elections and my son had come to her and said, "My daddy is an f-word conservative, but I can not remember how to spell that f-word."  She was a little freaked out, and I was confused since I did not know where the convo had come from.  I asked her to let me talk to him, and his f-word was fiscal (you know mommy, when they are real careful how they spend money).  So not what the teachers (or I) had thought.


Wife to M , Mommy to DS aka Captain Obvious  (06/06) and DD aka Lissalot  (03/09, anoxic brain injury)
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#28 of 39 Old 03-25-2013, 10:05 AM
 
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"f-word conservative" that made me laugh smile.gif

 

Conversation around the dinosaur fridge magnets this morning: "What is this one called, Daddy?" "I think that's Pachycephalosaurus, DS." "No, Daddy, it's Parasaurolophus (finds and points) THERE'S Pachycephalosaurus! See, Daddy?" "You're right, DS!" "Yes, Daddy."ROTFLMAO.gifSuch a cute teacher - he was very patient and watched his Dad closely to see if he was absorbing the lesson.


~ Lucky wife of DH blowkiss.gifand loving mama to DS biggrinbounce.gif (04/11) ~

 

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#29 of 39 Old 03-26-2013, 04:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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These are all so great, I luxlove.gif them!

 

Tonight, DD wrapped her arms around my neck when I was tucking her into bed and said 

 

"I'm going to keep you, Mommy!  You'll stay here with me and we will stay up all night and talk about hydrogen!"

 

Oh boy! banana.gif Hehe.


Beth knit.gif.  wife to DH and Mama to DD1 heartbeat.gif (May 1-09) and DD2 heartbeat.gif (Nov 2-11)   

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#30 of 39 Old 04-08-2013, 07:15 PM
 
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New one to add.  DS crashed hard while trying to get on the swing by himself.  "Owwww!!  My brain smacked my cranium when I hit the Earth's crust - wahhhh!!!!!!!!!!!" Sometimes it's really hard not to laugh.


Life is strange and wonderful.  Me read.gif, DP lady.gif, DS (3/09) blahblah.gif , 3 dog2.gif  and 4 cat.gif

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