My deaf 14-year old son - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 06-25-2014, 06:48 AM - Thread Starter
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Red face My deaf 14-year old son

I live in SouthAmerica, Colombia. I have 2 sons (a 14 and 17 years old) My older son is going to the best university of Colombia because he scored high in the exams. My older son when he was 4 years old, he scored 138 in a "supposed IQ test" and they requested me to put him in a gifted school, a request which I deneged. I did not like this system, because the teachers always were tellin´the students they were superior and genius above the regular persons. So my son studied in a really good school and he did well, fortunately he was not bored and he enjoyed his same-age peers. And when my son Daniel was born, we discovered that he was profoundly deaf so we put him a cochlear implant which didnt work because of the body-reject then he uses an audioset since he is 2.

Daniel was very different from the normal people, he was really curious. He did develop his language later because of the deafness but now he speaks perfectly Spanish, English and learns French. He showed to have so many interests in so many aereas (Astronomy, Science, Facts, Books (Science fiction and classic) and Botanic) He asked so many scientific questions which I could not answer at all, so he went to our bibliotec and started to read encyclopedias and others source at the age 8, he learned so fast. At the age 8, he started to have social issues, because he was socially inmmature but his vocabulary was beyond his teachers. He did really well in school, he had to use a special device to listen better to the teachers. He had problems socially, because he could not hear the conversations of his peers so well so he was a little sad. With the time, he got a really charming friend (a girl) and they were best friends, her friend was very smart and she was almost on the top of the class.

But when he went to 8th grade, he had already like 3 or 4 friends but he was tired of the people ignoring him (a silent bullying) he was really emotional and he could express all the stuff, so first we sent him to USA to study for 4 months so he got back and went to a only-boys school where he had a little more difficult and he sorta of hated his peers because they were "coldly-hearted" "unempathic" "rude" anyway he told me that is just a proccess of adaptation. Now he is going to accelerate to 9th grade, and I do not know if that is a really good choice because in 9th grade, the boys are a little grown-ups and more rude and sexually-intense. My son likes to hang up with older people but not with teenagers because he considers them like "impossible to have auto-control" I am worried sick with him, he can make nice conversations with people if he understands well them by hearing. He is so intensely compassionate, when he was like 7 years old, he dangerously asked a drunk home-less man that if he was okay and if that he needed something. Oh gosh, I got freaked out so I took my son´s arm because a drunk man is a total danger but I felt good of his early-empathy

Many times I suspected he was gifted but he did not take the IQ tests because he was very young and deaf. Even his deafness, his vocabulary is out of this world and he performs really well in the language. He is almost excellent in all areas except in math, he had math problems since he was five. But he is going to Kumon and he told me that his math abilities were growing as his math logical thinking. Kumon is a math school which he goes every Saturday.

I am sorry for my English, I do not speak that well as my son does.

Can you give me some advice? Should I make him to do the IQ tests?
I will be so thankful if you answer me

Last edited by DanielCamilo001; 06-25-2014 at 07:05 AM.
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#2 of 2 Old 07-22-2014, 12:55 PM
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Welcome! I am sorry you haven't had any answers yet, probably because hardly anyone here is familiar with your school system! Your son appears to be what is called 2e, "twice exceptional", that is both intellectually gifted and disabled. This is a difficult combination, but so far it appears he is doing extremely well. There used to be a regular poster around who had a gifted and Deaf daughter (with cochlear implants) but she hasn't been around for while.

The emotional intensity and unusual empathy are very typical for gifted children, particularly those in the upper extremes. He will learn to temper it with street smartness, but will always have a hard time finding people to match him in this. This goes for all gifted children, not just the 2e population.

I would not worry about accelerating him for now, just trust the school and see how it goes. the ninth graders are probably full on into puberty, but that has the benefit that they will grow out of it all the sooner, and your son may find it easier to interact with his classmates once they aproach adulthood.

I am not sure what you would need an IQ test for at this point - would the school do any more for him than what they are doing now? Would you consider a different school? You might want to have it included in a medical workup (might come in free that way ) at some convenient point.Gifted kids usually enjoy IQ test, unlike other tests they have to take!

MeDH DS1 10/06 DD 08/10 DS2 10/12with SB and
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