What to do for a new NICU mama? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 02-17-2011, 08:45 AM - Thread Starter
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long story short, a friend of a friend had a 34weeker about 10days ago via csection.

They live about an hour away from the hopsital so they are now living in an RV in the hospital parking lot, husband is communiting back and forth to work while mama stays with baby.  The friend that introduced us lives across the country and I don't think they have much support close by.

I'm trying to fill in as best as I can, I imagine it's a tough way to start out.  

Since I don't know them that well, not sure what I can do that's very personal but I want to help with what I can.

 I made some food, got some preemie clothes (and washed them), some tea, a magazine.

I'll take another round of food every couple days.

what else would be helpful?


thanks for any ideas!

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#2 of 5 Old 02-17-2011, 08:22 PM
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My newest baby was in the nicu for 5 days. When my bff came to visit she asked what I needed, I told her I needed a shower but it upset me to even leave him. She asked me if she stayed while I went and took a shower if it would make me feel better knowing someone was there with him. It was exactly what I needed. My mom not only brought me meals but brought me snacks. Some fruit, cut veggies, crackers and peanut butter. My sis brought me a small nail kit, clippers, file, teeny bottle of polish remover and a baggie of cotton balls. She also brought me some chapstick and unscented lotion, because of the heating and air system @ the hospital my lips were chapped and the constant handwashing was drying out my skin.
But the simple fact that any sort of help was being offered was a great gift smile.gif
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#3 of 5 Old 02-18-2011, 01:38 PM
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Food is definitely good. Hot meals, if you have the time an energy.  A couple of things you might suggest she look into, if she hasn't already--some hospitals with NICUs provide hot meals to new nursing moms.  There should be some sort of patient liason that she could ask about this. If she's pumping, she may be able to store her milk at the hospital instead of trying to keep it in the RV.  Or you could offer to store any excess. This might not be an issue yet, but it could be down the road.  If you're close enough, you could offer to check their mail, or offer to let her do laundry at your house if it is closer to the hospital.  Some hospitals also have low-cost or free housing for parents with children admitted into the hospital.  If it looks like it's going to be a longer stay, you might suggest she check into that.  Then she would have laundry facilities, etc. on site.


It's such an overwhelming experience, don't be upset if she doesn't take you up on anything.  Keep offering.  It means the world.

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#4 of 5 Old 02-28-2011, 06:16 PM
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I think you've chosen wonderful items. I think the food is the best thing... perhaps some pumping supplies if she's expressing breast milk for baby? Or something to do while she's pumping.. an audio book perhaps? (I haven't read the other replies so forgive me if this is redundant.) When my daughter was in the NICU, my friends sent me a box from Omaha Steaks and it was the most wonderful thing I could have been given. To not have to worry about something as simple as dinner really had a tremendous impact on me. I'll never forget it.

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#5 of 5 Old 03-08-2011, 12:15 PM
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The stuff you're doing is great.  Is there anything she needs around home?  All those day to day chores that no one is doing right now add up, and since the baby was early, they may not be set up at all with nursery furniture or carseats or anything. 


That said, given what you're doing already, I might just suggest that to other people.

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