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View Poll Results: Moving to SN
Yes 12 19.35%
No 39 62.90%
I don't care 4 6.45%
Other (there always has to be an other) 7 11.29%
Voters: 62. You may not vote on this poll

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#1 of 34 Old 08-29-2008, 11:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Currently this board is hiding as a subforum of a subforum, it cannot be seen from the Index and new people to the boards are having problems finding it.

How would y'all feel about moving to SN and being a subforum of SN? Would that be ok?

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#2 of 34 Old 08-30-2008, 12:02 AM
 
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I can't say I love putting the board under SN. I think when I was a brand-new preemie parent, the close linking of preemie and special needs would've scared me a little, as if it were a foregone conclusion that my children would have special needs throughout their lives.

Is there a particular reason that it can't just be another "Age and Stage"?

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#3 of 34 Old 08-30-2008, 12:12 AM
 
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I agree with what the first poster said, although alot of preemies do end up being special needs children.

i honestly don't care where we go, i would just like to be able to view the forum from the index again
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#4 of 34 Old 08-30-2008, 12:18 AM
 
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I really don't think it belongs under SN. Not all preemies will have special needs at anytime in their life. And I know as a new preemie parent it would have scared the daylights to already be put in the situtation of having my child labled special need already.

Preemie parents have concerns about their babies survival at the time, and need to relate to other parents who have been through the same thing. If need be in the future they can and should move over to the SN board.

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#5 of 34 Old 08-30-2008, 12:31 AM
 
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Not a regular poster here, but the first place I would probably look for it would be Birth and Beyond, then ages and stages.

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#6 of 34 Old 08-30-2008, 09:07 PM
 
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#7 of 34 Old 08-30-2008, 10:08 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OGirlieMama View Post
I can't say I love putting the board under SN. I think when I was a brand-new preemie parent, the close linking of preemie and special needs would've scared me a little, as if it were a foregone conclusion that my children would have special needs throughout their lives.

Is there a particular reason that it can't just be another "Age and Stage"?
I agree.
And, I have to say, that having it not visible from the main menu will probably cause a lot of people to miss this forum. When my twins were born, the last thing I wanted to do was search sub forums for a nicu forum. I really think it would be better if it could be seen from the main forum page.

Lindsey- SAHM to Skylar (7-12-01), Leah (10-29-04), id twin boys Addison and Riley (6-17-08, born at 25w4d), and Terran (5-29-11, born at 28 weeks)

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#8 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 03:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I understand that not all preemies will have SN when they are older, but are NICU babies not SN simply by the fact that they are in NICU?

My son was in NICU, it was horrible. Simply because he has heart issues doesn't mean he will be SN later, he is just that way now.

However I do understand what OGirlieMama is saying about how that could be an anxiety trigger.

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#9 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 08:32 AM
 
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Originally Posted by abimommy View Post
I understand that not all preemies will have SN when they are older, but are NICU babies not SN simply by the fact that they are in NICU?

My son was in NICU, it was horrible. Simply because he has heart issues doesn't mean he will be SN later, he is just that way now.

However I do understand what OGirlieMama is saying about how that could be an anxiety trigger.

I never really considered my dd special needs while she was in the NICU, it was more of just a stage in her life, which is why I think it should go under Ages and Stages.

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#10 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 01:29 PM
 
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put it with the parenting multiples area... sn would be a bad move.

Mama to lovely twin girls 1/08
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#11 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 01:40 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by abimommy View Post
I understand that not all preemies will have SN when they are older, but are NICU babies not SN simply by the fact that they are in NICU?

My son was in NICU, it was horrible. Simply because he has heart issues doesn't mean he will be SN later, he is just that way now.

However I do understand what OGirlieMama is saying about how that could be an anxiety trigger.
Former NICU mom here.

Please don't put it under special needs, it will scare off people. My babies BH didn't have any special needs at all, they were just small. Just being in the hospital doesn't make you special needs any more than a 4yo going in to have his tonsils out or a hernia fixed is automaticly "special needs." Put it in ages and stages, or even as a subsection under health and healing or breastfeeding.

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#12 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 02:40 PM
 
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Originally Posted by yogafeet View Post
put it with the parenting multiples area... sn would be a bad move.

Not all preemies are multiples. Mine wasn't.

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#13 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 03:17 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yogafeet View Post
put it with the parenting multiples area... sn would be a bad move.
Quote:
Originally Posted by felix23 View Post
Not all preemies are multiples. Mine wasn't.
I wonder if yogafeet meant put it in the "family life" heading, under which "parenting multiples" lives, so NICU/Preemie would be an equivalent title in the same area. I debated that suggestion, too.

And I never considered my kids "special needs" when they were in the NICU. They had special medical requirements, but that is not the same as the popular definition of "special needs" or the purpose of that forum.

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#14 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 03:35 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OGirlieMama View Post
I wonder if yogafeet meant put it in the "family life" heading, under which "parenting multiples" lives, so NICU/Preemie would be an equivalent title in the same area. I debated that suggestion, too.

And I never considered my kids "special needs" when they were in the NICU. They had special medical requirements, but that is not the same as the popular definition of "special needs" or the purpose of that forum.
You're probably right.

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#15 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 08:06 PM
 
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Our son was a premie and in the NICU but does not have special needs.

I agree that it could fit under "family life" or "birth and beyond".

Also, as many of babies in the NICU are a result of preterm labor or other high-risk pregnancies, I wonder if these could fit together somehow?
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#16 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 08:30 PM
 
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Another vote for NOT moving it to special needs. Why can't it stay part of Ages and Stages? Just bump it up to a forum of it's own instead of a sub-form of LWAB.

DS was born 8 weeks early but was a "feeder and grower" without any significant health issues, physical, developmental, or otherwise.

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#17 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 08:59 PM
 
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I had a FT baby in the NICU. I do agree that a baby being in the NICU does give them SN's all their own but not the type of SN's that one thinks of when visiting a SN's forum.

I forget about it with where it is right now which is a bummer b/c I liked to be able to see the most recent post title.

Ages & Stages could be a good spot for it since those categories are mostly to do with parenting as is the NICU.
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#18 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 09:08 PM
 
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how about in one of the birth forums? - oh. someone suggested birth and beyond. PERFECT. thats where id look first.
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#19 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 11:13 PM
 
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I agree with ages and stages or in family life. Special needs doesn't bother me but I do have a child that is SN, not the one that was hospitalized either.

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#20 of 34 Old 08-31-2008, 11:41 PM
 
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I am against putting this forum in SN as I wouldn't have thought to look under SN to find it when my dd was newborn and in the NICU...the time when parents REALLY need to find it! I didn't consider my dd SN and she never has been.

In fact I really preferred the old format for all the forums and was wondering why there needed to be a change in the first place:

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#21 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 12:48 AM
 
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Mamas, could we please tread lightly here? Some of the comments may be hurtful to our special needs parents.

Also, questions about the board organization need to go to Q and S, not in this thread.

Thanks!

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#22 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 12:54 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OGirlieMama View Post
I wonder if yogafeet meant put it in the "family life" heading, under which "parenting multiples" lives, so NICU/Preemie would be an equivalent title in the same area. I debated that suggestion, too.

And I never considered my kids "special needs" when they were in the NICU. They had special medical requirements, but that is not the same as the popular definition of "special needs" or the purpose of that forum.
Special medical requirements is one of the purposes of that forum.

I am not sure what you think SN is.

There also used to be a thread in SN that later became the Gifted forum.

Does everyone understand the SN forum is simply for kids who have special emotional/medical or other needs?

My child was a FT baby in NICU and he has a wide variety of different needs.

He might have more attachment issues due to being in a hospital warmer rather than in my arms nursing him all the time, he has a team of specialists, he had an Echo cardiogram before any of his *Grandparents* even had one.

The only reason I was seeing how it might trigger anxiety is that it might be overwhelming, not because I don't think it is fitting.

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#23 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 01:07 AM
 
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I think that's a reasonable move.

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#24 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 10:20 AM
 
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I think as a subforum of SNs it makes complete sense since SNs doesn't imply any time line of those SNs. Some SNs are short term, some long term, some lifelong. But being a NICU parent is certainly different than having a FT baby with no need to visit a NICU so its "special" in that sense. Its not an age and stage that all children pass through.
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#25 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 11:19 AM
 
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For now, my nicu micro preemie is 2 1/2 and doing well but has speech therapy.

But when she was born, there was no place in special needs but I can see how this fits in it. When you bring a nicu grad home, there are special needs for this baby. Some are higher needs than others. If anything, I am glad its here for the new preemie parents because I remember I felt I needed a place like this just like the special needs forum needs to be there for any family dealing with special needs.

ETA- I checked "I dont care" meaning I just want the board up and running, not that I dont care if that makes any sense.

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#26 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 03:27 PM
 
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My earlier comments didn't read as well as I intended them, and I hope they didn't cause offense to anyone. The point I wanted to get across is I've always understood special needs to be ongoing medical or emotional needs, not temporary ones. For most NICU patients, the serious medical requirements are temporary. If one of my children, right now at 2.5 years old, got sick and was in the hospital for 9 weeks (the same length as their NICU stay) but was not going to require ongoing treatment, it wouldn't occur to me to look on the special needs board.

Of course, the more I think about it, prematurity is such a gray area. My kids did need a lot of follow-up and monitoring post-NICU, and one of them was on O2 for a few more months, but because I was always assured that this was temporary, it never occurred to me to consider that special needs. Maybe it should have.

The more the conversation goes on, the less I really care, though, about where the board goes as long as it is visible from the main forum list. But I do continue to wonder why NICU/Preemie has to be subforum of anything, rather than just another forum. I realize that is a question about board organization, which, as annettemarie pointed out, belongs in Q&S, so if you want me to delete that, I don't mind doing so, but it seems like then maybe we should just move this whole thread, since that's the whole point of it.

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#27 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 08:09 PM
 
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Does it have to be a subforum?

I don't know if it belongs under SN. My child clearly has special needs with oxygen; a feeding tube; speech, occupational, and physical therapy and multiple doctor's appointments yet I always felt 'intrusive' by naming him special needs, if that makes any sense. In other words, a mother who has a child with a significant amount of adaptive equipment might take offense at me naming my largely normal child special needs because most of his 'special' needs will go away at some point in the future. Does that make sense?
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#28 of 34 Old 09-01-2008, 11:44 PM
 
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I voted "other" for "Ages and Stages" as its own subforum there, right "before" LWAB. Preemies ARE technically babies, but they're Very Early babies and discussing your preemie baby is a little different than discussing your 6 month old.

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#29 of 34 Old 09-02-2008, 03:31 AM
 
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When I was a new NICU mom, I would not have thought to look for this forum in SN. I think being a preemie is certainly an "age and stage", as these babies have their own specific milestones, specific shared characteristics, etc.

Please give this group as much visibility as possible.

Thanks!

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#30 of 34 Old 09-02-2008, 12:26 PM
 
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I would like for it to not be a sub-forum of a sub-forum. So whether it's under Ages and Stages (and not buried under LWAB, please), or as a part of Birth and Beyond (you're pregnant and hanging out with your DDC, and all of a sudden you've got a baby that isn't in your arms yet), or Special Needs (because certainly taking care of a preemie requires special considerations that last beyond the NICU), it doesn't matter to me where you slot it, as long as it's accessible from the top page.

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