Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: san diego
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Michele, mom of DD 5/01, DD 11/03, and DS 11/06
Barbara: an always learning SAHM of Ilana (11) and Aiden (8) living in Belgium with my amazing husband.
Hi, this may not be applicable to your situation, as it sounds like you have a trusting relationship with your friend. I have a friend who's also going to be a doula, she's a bit younger than me and we're great friends, although I know that if allowed to be, she can be subtly manipulating or get a little 'too close', kwim? If I had her as my doula, I feel I would be putting her in a position of control or authority over me, and I'm not willing to do that. Birthing and coping with pregnancy is MINE and I will tell her about it and we can talk and she can offer advice, but I don't want to ever allow her to claim any responsibility or credit for anything that happens with my body, baby or birth. This sounds paranoid, but I'm willing to offer positions of trust to a professional midwife, my mother and my sister (on an even level) but not a friend. Although, maybe you have a sister-like relationship with this woman.
These are my opinionns, specific to my situation, but the only advice I would pass along is to analyze your relationship with your friend and decide if there's enough trust to allow the relationship to develop to doula-patient. Of course, you are still technically 'in control' as if would be a hiring position (even if she's doing you a favour) and you maintain control. I just wouldn't want this friend of mine 'that close', you know?
Good luck in your decision! Sounds like it's a great opportunity, though, if she's willing to 'practice' on you, and you prefer that than someone else supporting you!
+= Peanut (2004), Pumpkin (2007) and Butter Bean!! (2011)