Things you should never say to a pg woman...for cyring out loud people! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 02:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Okay, Green Mom's post about PPD ... "he made a comment to her about me looking very snowman-like while I was sitting on my birth ball" has inspired this thread...

Let me add my own DH's stupid comment that I tried to laugh off but still stung....
"Haha...you look like Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum!" I was wearing a striped shirt which didn't help, but still!

And my dd, who's 5 so gets a full pardon immediately based on age for this comment..."Mama, is the baby as big as this house?" "No, he's in my tummy and I'm not as big as this house." DD's reply: "But Mama..." with an eye look that said it all...

Anyone else get some stupid comments they want to share?
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#2 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 05:30 PM
 
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I got one yesterday. I was at IKEA, buying a frozen yogurt for DS. The woman behind the counter handed it to him and said, "Don't you have a nice grandma for buying you an ice cream!" Um, I know I have some gray hairs - I don't want to color my hair while pregnant - but I don't look that old! Made me feel REAL nice and pretty, let me tell you. She had an accent so I tried to tell myself maybe she confused the word for mother with grandma - ?!
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#3 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 06:33 PM
 
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I've been told that I'm waddling - how appealing!
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#4 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 09:20 PM
 
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My boss said to our database programmer "you remember jessma. As you can see, she now has to squeeze between her desk and her chair." Two days later he said I was looking "terrifically pregnant." No wonder I'm hoping to find something else while I'm on maternity leave.
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#5 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 09:26 PM
 
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My MIL informed me it didn't look like I had gained too much... then wanted to know how much I had. She proceeded to look me up and down very carefully and informed my thighs looked bigger. I just glared and said "well I am not carrying a 20 pound baby, so that weight has to go somewhere." She knows I had anorexia in the past... talk about insensitive!:

Me: Shannon (33) mom to DD Everly born May 9, 2007 and Maisie born May 26
: : :
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#6 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 09:48 PM
 
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my friend keeps asking "what is that thing?its enormous! oh and the woman who suggested i buy a bright yellow jump suit "if it walks like a duck, she said ughhhhhh

Annemarie ~catholic mom of 8 -4 boys (19-16-10-7).Emma)2 girls (3 and 1)Someone new due in April too!An yes I Blog @ You Leave me breadless blog
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#7 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 09:58 PM
 
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I hate it when people tell me I look like I am ready to pop. I'm 37 weeks for goodness sake! I'm NOT READY TO POP!!
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#8 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 10:21 PM
 
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Sorry to interrupt (I can't think of anything amusing/insulting anyone has said to me at the moment), but I just wanted to say hi to Shannie77... I'm in Toronto too.
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#9 of 29 Old 04-19-2007, 10:25 PM
 
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I had a guy tell me a few weeks ago oh Twins and when I glared at him he said sorry Triplets and he was dead serious. Really I am not that big of course in one day I can be told I am too small or I am too huge fortunately the well placed well my doctor thinks I am perfect shuts them up.

Heidi
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#10 of 29 Old 04-20-2007, 08:48 AM
 
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Originally Posted by ex-stasis View Post
Sorry to interrupt (I can't think of anything amusing/insulting anyone has said to me at the moment), but I just wanted to say hi to Shannie77... I'm in Toronto too.
Hey!!

Me: Shannon (33) mom to DD Everly born May 9, 2007 and Maisie born May 26
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#11 of 29 Old 04-20-2007, 09:26 AM
 
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yesterday i was going to the bathroom with my 2 year old with me & she looked at me very seriously with her thumb in her mouth...."mama, your butt is BIG." i had to laugh because you know what? it IS!?

a few days ago, too, i made a comment to dh about how my butt gets bigger with each pregnancy. he laughed & then had this distant look on his face. "i need to schedule my vasectomy, don't i?" he was completely serious, too, and i knew what he was thinking!!!!

stephanie asl.gif

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#12 of 29 Old 04-20-2007, 03:53 PM
 
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I'm only getting small comments but on a related, sort-of, note, I took my DD to her soon-to-be new daycare today and she was happily sitting at the table with the other kids when the teacher bent over ahead of her and she yelled out "Mommy, that lady has a big bum!" Luckily the teacher didn't hear but man, i just about burst out laughing. So it begins! Welcome to three.

ILANA
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#13 of 29 Old 04-20-2007, 05:17 PM
 
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I was at a wedding more than a MONTH ago and a man looked at me and said "About two more weeks, right?" I'm STILL not two weeks from my due date yet...

Also, this was less the comment and more the situation, but it almost made me cry! Last week in the midst of my low fluid saga, when I was at the height of emotional "my babies are going to have to come out too early" thinking - I showed up for one of my bi-weekly bpp's. I was about 15 minutes early and knew I'd probably be called in late (they had to fit me in that day) and I had to pee DESPERATELY. When I asked the receptionist if I could go to the bathroom, (you have to ask to get through the doors) she just looked at me coldly and said in a sort of rude way "if you're having a sonogram, she won't want you to." A) After this ordeal, my sonographer and I have a close, personal relationship. I know exactly what she'll want to do each time I visit, and I knew that this visit did not require a full bladder. B) I'm probably not going to be seen for another 20 minutes which you should know is an entirely sufficient amount of time for my bladder to refill itself!

Do not deny an emotionally distraught pregnant woman bathroom privileges...
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#14 of 29 Old 04-21-2007, 07:31 AM
 
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Someone told me that my baby is looking too big to birth. I'm very close to 38 weeks. I'm a plus size momma, so of course I'm going to look big!
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#15 of 29 Old 04-21-2007, 11:35 AM
 
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Hey...well I din't start out in your DDC, but I keep checking in lately because I think my LO is going to come in May ...and I guess if you read on you can see why I wish I had told everyone my EDD was in May

I definately have a problem with the "explode" and "pop" comments! I get super preturbed when people DO NOT REALIZE I'm pregnant (I'm 39wks and have gained about twice what I was "suposed" to - and nearly all of my maternity shirts can't even cover my belly...)

I think the most aganizing ones to me right now though occur whenever I show up to work or school - and usually by multiple people in a row... "You're still here!?" or "No baby yet!?" They act so shocked! I'm not even "due" yet! Oh and also the, "are you dilated yet?" and "when are you getting induced?" Which...neither has been checked or discussed nor do I have any desire to..
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#16 of 29 Old 04-21-2007, 03:44 PM
 
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I'm about ready to shoot people for their stupid comments!!! And if one more person calls and say's "Have you had the baby yet!" HELL NO!!! I wouldn't answer the phone b/c I wouldn't be HERE!!! I had to tell my Mom, MIL and my very best friend in the whole world that if they asked me one more time if I'd had the baby yet I was going to go crazy on them! Do those 3 people REALLY think I'm not going to call them when I go into labor (they are all 3,000 miles away so we gotta call them)? Amazing to me!!

Sorry, I'm a bit grumpy today after a night of being up w/ another round of contractions that have once again petered out!
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#17 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 02:13 AM
 
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Originally Posted by LilMomma83 View Post

I think the most aganizing ones to me right now though occur whenever I show up to work or school - and usually by multiple people in a row... "You're still here!?" or "No baby yet!?" They act so shocked! I'm not even "due" yet!
Ugh. this is just starting to happen to me, and I am not even due until early June !

I work at a school and was on spring break for 3 weeks, so I guess everyone is shocked at how much huger I look.

Mama to my spirited J, and L, my homebirth: baby especially DTaP, MMR (family vax injuries)
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#18 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 02:59 AM
 
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Ugh. this is just starting to happen to me, and I am not even due until early June !

I work at a school and was on spring break for 3 weeks, so I guess everyone is shocked at how much huger I look.
I am 38.5 weeks and went to pick my step-son up from school, as I do every Wed and his teacher JUST noticed today that I am pregnant and couldn't believe it. I FEEL like I'm as big as a house... but one of the other mom's has a 3 month old and told me I looked good and not very big. Phew!

Mom to Kayleigh (05/07) Jacob (05/09) and Ned decluttering 615/2010
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#19 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 04:54 AM
 
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A waitress asked me how much longer and I said "about a month" and her jaw just dropped. She said "oh, you're huge! I would have thought you were due last week!" This was seriously at 36 weeks, and I was NOT that big. And I was even wearing black!!!!

I wore a huge coat all winter and no one knew I was pregnant. Now I am just avoiding the places where people will want to talk to me about it, like the post office, one of the grocery stores, and the credit union. I'm going to send my husband on all my errands there until I have the baby. I just do not feel like talking about it. I'm even avoiding eye contact with my neighbors.
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#20 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 09:50 AM
 
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Ok, not in your DDC, but I had to post mine, too! The week before Easter (I was 31 wks) the man who sits in front of us in church asked if we were having an Easter baby! Then a few minutes later a mother of 5 came up to me and asked me if I was due soon. Jeepers, I was feeling on top of the world that day

Beth wife to Tom and mommy to Therese 11/4/04 Anna Mary 6/15/07 and Veronica 10/20/09
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#21 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 04:59 PM
 
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I told my husband yesterday that I must have reached "critical mass" because all of a sudden, I can't go anywhere without a comment.

The first, at the San Diego Zoo from another mom - "wow you like you're about ready to pop." Me: 'wow, thanks, I still have 6 weeks."

Then at the grocery store, another mom "you must have twins in there" Me: Um no, just one, but thank you for the well wishes. <sarcastic tone>

It just goes on and on. Its like - come on! DH thinks the next time someone says something to me I should stop and "educate" them on how to deal with a pregnant woman. Here my imagination of the incident:

Old Man: "Wow, you look like you are ready to pop/having twins/really huge"

Me: "You know, I'm having one baby and its not polite to comment on my size. I'm feeling uncomfortable enough without your inconsiderate comments. Perhaps the next time you see a pregnant woman and want to comment on how she looks you should say. "Wow you really look beautiful/glowing/goddess-like.""

Vanessa... Happily married to a paramedic - celebrating 10 years of marriage!  Mama to one crazy 6 year old transformer and one chatterbox 4 year old princess.  Daycare provider to many jumping beans  I'm expecting my third in late November. 

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#22 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 05:54 PM
 
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In December 2005, I had a second trimester fetal loss of my son. Now, I am pregnany again (due end of May, start of June) with another boy.

I've actually had relatives ask me "Is he still alive?" :
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#23 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 07:58 PM
 
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In December 2005, I had a second trimester fetal loss of my son. Now, I am pregnany again (due end of May, start of June) with another boy.

I've actually had relatives ask me "Is he still alive?" :
Whoa, now that is the worst one I have ever heard. It is one thing for people to make you feel fat, but sheesh, talk about totally insensitive.

I am sorry for your loss.

Beth wife to Tom and mommy to Therese 11/4/04 Anna Mary 6/15/07 and Veronica 10/20/09
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#24 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 10:46 PM
 
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In December 2005, I had a second trimester fetal loss of my son. Now, I am pregnant again (due end of May, start of June) with another boy.

I've actually had relatives ask me "Is he still alive?" :
That is SO rude!!!

Mom to Kayleigh (05/07) Jacob (05/09) and Ned decluttering 615/2010
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#25 of 29 Old 04-26-2007, 10:55 PM
 
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And it's not like that question isn't on my mind 24 hours a day, anyway. Heaven forbid the poor little guy stop moving enough to take a nap or something! He's been zapped with a dopplar WAY to much, but I've been afraid since the stick turned blue.

Quote:
I am sorry for your loss.

Thank you. I still miss him.
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#26 of 29 Old 04-27-2007, 12:13 AM
 
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The other night we were at my parents house and I was talking about how sad I was about the stretch marks that have suddenly decided to show up. I only got a few teeny tiny ones with dd and they didn't show up until I was 41 weeks. So I was complaining to my mom that they were only going to get worse with each passing day. DH walked over to take a peek at my belly and said, "wow, hopefully you have this baby soon."

Ouch.

Jenn, future midwife, mama to 2 sweet girls (6/05) and (5/07). 
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#27 of 29 Old 04-28-2007, 07:49 AM
 
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A co-worker (male, single, childless) who'd barely gotten a glimpse of me said that if my feet were any indication, I'd go into labor soon. He said his sister went into labor 2 days after her feet swelled up. Thanks for noticing AND pointing it out to me, bud.
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#28 of 29 Old 04-28-2007, 05:12 PM
 
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I am getting sick of people telling me OH you have not dropped yet no baby for you anytime soon. Okay A. I am on baby number 5, the odds are I am not going to drop and B. which I do not share with strangers, I am having a c-section. C. Why would you tell a very pregnant woman who is obviously miserable you are never going to go into labor?

By the way, I went to the doctor on Friday and my darling child is actually higher then she has been. I think my baby might have a touch of too much of her daddy in her and for some reason is thinking I am going to vomit her out. I wish she would move, my ribs are killing. Her butt is on my rib that I broke this past December and let me tell you it HURTS.

Heidi
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#29 of 29 Old 04-28-2007, 05:21 PM
 
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Originally Posted by VOBetz View Post
I told my husband yesterday that I must have reached "critical mass" . . .
Oh just tickles me like nothing else

~laura
and planning to eat it again
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