I'm not sure if nervous is the right word for how I feel, but I know that I don't feel as laidback as the midwives describe for second-time moms. Labor is a funny thing. After my first, I've looked back on my 22-hour, pain-filled labor very fondly. Right after my dd was born, I'd replay the labor in my head, especially the part where I pushed her out into the world! But even though you're supposed to, I haven't forgotten the pain (I still remember how panicked I felt when transition set in). It's so weird that labor can be so wonderful and scary at the same time. This time around, I've had some painful bh contractions, and instead of like the midwife described ("oh yeah, I remember this, no biggie"), I was like "oh yeah, I remember this, and sh*t, it's going to get 20,000 times worse in actual labor!"). Am I alone in feeling this way? I'm looking forward to birthing my daughter unmedicated again, and I know that it will be as special as the first-time, but I can't help dreading the pain part. In fact, I think I dread it more this time around because I know what it means.
Maybe I'm worrying about it for nothing, though, and the reality will be like the midwives said. In a lot of ways, I know so much more of what to expect. I intentionally chose a birth center (instead of a hospital), so that I can use a hot tub (the hospital wouldn't allow it). I know warm water is supposed to help with the pain. And if a water birth feels natural, I plan to go for it and stay in the tub. I also will recognize transition this time around (the nurse told me to push when I was in transition, which was the main reason my labor ended up being so long; I pushed for two hours before my body was ready and was wiped out by the time I could push for real..and then I had to push for four hours!). Odds are that this labor will be much shorter (which would also make it easier to deal with the pain because I won't be so tired).
Anyone else feel similarly?