"well wishes" from the mainstream - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 12 Old 05-11-2007, 11:05 AM - Thread Starter
 
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You know, sometimes the less educated population really irks me!

My grandmother (who had twins around 50 years ago) has apparently been praying daily that I'll *get* a c-section!!! b/c of all of the "risks" with twins... granted my twins have separate placentas, separate sacs, are in prime position for delivery with normal amounts of fluid, and I'm almost at 38 weeks so all of the twins risks I can think of, don't apply to me!

And my mom is starting to freak out about how big they're getting. She asks daily what my mw is going to "do" if I don't have them now. The estimate right now is 8.5 lbs each. I'm really not all that uncomfortable right now carrying that much baby, and my mom delivered an 11 lb baby vaginally (and still went on to have me, so it obviously didn't "break" her) - you'd think of all people that she'd understand that it is possible to birth a big baby.

It just annoys me when people are trying to wish interventions on me!!! I know they have good intentions, but come on people - sheesh!
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#2 of 12 Old 05-11-2007, 11:52 AM
 
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Yikes - sorry for the "advice" you're getting...it sounds like you're doing great though. Have you seen the Psalm & Zoya birth? Those twins weren't born until 40 weeks, and both were more than 8 lbs (if I remember correctly...). You'll do great - what lucky babies to have a mom like you, planning for a nice, peaceful entrance

Midwife and mama in the Valley of the Sun
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#3 of 12 Old 05-11-2007, 12:06 PM
 
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Was your mother's big-baby-birth especially difficult for her maybe? I know people who've described their own births negatively to me have seemed more likely to express worries for me over mine.
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#4 of 12 Old 05-11-2007, 12:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't think I've read that birth story yet - I'll go look for it now!

And yes, due to many factors (not just a big baby), that was a difficult birth for her... so I can understand where she's coming from, but she almost acts like she's mad that I'd grow babies this big and still try to finish out my pregnancy naturally! Her smallest baby (of 4) was 7 lbs 9 oz, so she did have plenty of non-awful births with non-tiny babies.

It also happens to be this type of well-wisher that tends to be super invasive and calling all the time to see if the babies are coming yet... I need to make a point to talk more with my friends and family that understand and support a healthy, natural pregnancy - since they're the ones that also have the sense to give me some space!
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#5 of 12 Old 05-11-2007, 06:43 PM
 
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nak
its a movie the psalm & zoya one, but maybe its a story too.

i wish there was some kind of happy fun island all the pregger women could go to in order to get out of listening to all the advice & birth stories
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#6 of 12 Old 05-11-2007, 10:45 PM
 
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you're growing 2 big healthy babies there. Try to block them out for the next few days.

Great job by the way!
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#7 of 12 Old 05-12-2007, 02:25 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sarabrynn82 View Post
My grandmother (who had twins around 50 years ago) has apparently been praying daily that I'll *get* a c-section!!!
OMG I would have to give her a piece of my mind! With all the hormonal action I have going on, I would be really irritated at the presumptuousness of that! I'm lucky I don't have to see myself go on that particular rampage. hahaha
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#8 of 12 Old 05-12-2007, 09:12 AM
 
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I'm sorry you have such a tough audience around you. Not too much longer though and you can use your beautiful babies as a distraction for any of their "advice."
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#9 of 12 Old 05-12-2007, 01:40 PM
 
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They also have to understand (not that it matters, anyway, BUT) those estimates are NEVER right. My dd was est to be 8 lbs and was 6, my son was est to be 8.5 lbs, and was 10 lbs. It's just not accurate. I don't even listen to them when they tell me an estimate. I'd also have to tell grandma that a c-section wouldn't be something to "ask" for due to the fact that you are going to be more efficient at taking care of the babies once they're born if you don't have a painful incision to heal. It's just not something to request (unless you're Brittany Spears). Now if something comes up and it has to be done, that's different.
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#10 of 12 Old 05-12-2007, 03:11 PM
 
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You might want to remind them that the bigger your twins the healthier and easier life will be for you

the advice from mainstreamers is pretty at times

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#11 of 12 Old 05-12-2007, 03:17 PM
 
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Totally fabulous!

Give more**Expect Less
There is no such thing as bad weather. Only bad clothing.
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#12 of 12 Old 05-13-2007, 01:28 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by darsmama View Post
nak

i wish there was some kind of happy fun island all the pregger women could go to in order to get out of listening to all the advice & birth stories
nak as well and it's so nice to finally be able to say that!

that is the best idea i've heard in aong time...seriously. going to 43.5 weeks brought on so much fear and negativity. and my babe is perfect.

op--you will do great and so will your babies!
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