Telling older kids? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 12 Old 01-15-2007, 03:53 PM - Thread Starter
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For those of you who have other kids already, when are you telling them about the new baby? DD is two and we haven't told anyone yet. She has watched videos of babies being born (and looooved them "Mama Baby Out! More!) but that's about the extent of it.

I want to give her plenty of time to adjust to the idea of a new baby, but I don't think it will do much good to tell her about the baby now since I'm not showing or anything. So when's a good time to start talking about it, do you think?
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#2 of 12 Old 01-15-2007, 04:18 PM
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We have DH's 6 year old DS with us currently. I wanted to wait until later to tell him but DH thought it wouldn't be fair. He wanted to be able to talk about the pregnancy and not stop if he came in the room. I told him it wouldn't be like that. Anyway, I digress...we told him at dinner sometime last week.

DD is only 20 months so I haven't really "told" her anything. I've wondered about that since she is so young. yes she understands what I'm saying but will she honestly get it? I don't know...seems odd to me.

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#3 of 12 Old 01-15-2007, 04:23 PM
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We have not told the older children yet either, but have told just about everyone else. Once we tell the kids, EVERYONE will know, including the few people that we have not told.

We are planning to tell them on Friday before our first midwife visit, at our house. We are hoping to hear the heartbeat then and would like them to be a part of it...and they may wonder what the hec is going on if we don't tell them! This will put us at 12 weeks when we tell them.

With a younger child, I really don't think it matters as much. My dd turned 2, 2 months before my ds was born and she didn't really seem to get it anyway. I mean, she knew there was a baby in there and she would point to my belly and say, "baby"...but in general she was pretty oblivious. When he came he just kind of fit into our lives and there wasn't really a problem with adjustment for her.
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#4 of 12 Old 01-15-2007, 04:35 PM
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My son is 22 months and I talk to him about it a lot. At his age, he needs a lot of repetition to really get things, so I figure if I tell him many times now, he'll be used to the idea by the time the baby gets here.
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#5 of 12 Old 01-15-2007, 04:41 PM
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We told 4 year old DD as soon as we fact, she watched me take pregnancy tests, I don't ever get to go to the bathroom alone.

As for 2 year old DS, we've told him, but he has no clue and I doubt he'll really get it till the baby comes home, he'll be 3 in March but he has pretty severe communication, cognitive, and social delays, so it's more like he is 18 months.

Jillian wife to Ryan and mommy to Janelle Ashlynn (9/09/2002), Kincaid Chance (3/29/2004), Travis Neil (8/13/2007) and River Anderson (5/02/2009).
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#6 of 12 Old 01-15-2007, 06:24 PM
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We told the girls in mid-December, just before announcing it to the rest of the family. I was extremely sick this time, and spending lots of time in bed until about a week ago. Telling my 5 1/2 year old was very helpful to her. She loves, loves, loves babies, and knowing that mama needed extra rest to grow the new baby helped her to feel ok about our homelife being turned upside down for a while.

Dd2 is also exited, but doesn't really understand yet what it all means.
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#7 of 12 Old 01-16-2007, 12:52 AM
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I told all of my kids immediately because I wanted them to know why I was feeling under the weather, and so they would be ok with helping out more, and nursing less(for my 4 yr old).

Single mama to Alex(13), Maddy(12), Sam(8), Violet(6), and Ruby(3). fly-by-nursing1.gif
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#8 of 12 Old 01-16-2007, 03:33 PM
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havent' told older kids yet. I would like to get it on video when we do.
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#9 of 12 Old 01-16-2007, 08:45 PM
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My four year old knew right away because I asked her to nurse less. The funny thing is she keeps telling her siblings and they don't believe her. She even has pictures from the ultrasound. For right now because it is early we are not making a big deal about telling anyone.
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#10 of 12 Old 01-16-2007, 09:37 PM
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We have not told DD who is 5 1/2 or DS who is almost 3. I think 6 or 7 months is really long for kids and I will wait until its totally obvious.
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#11 of 12 Old 01-16-2007, 10:55 PM
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We weren't going to tell the kids right away, but my 5 year old dd walked in the room while I was on the phone with the doctor's office, so she found out within a few days of me testing. We have told my 2 1/2 year old ds as well, and both kids came along for the early ultrasound.
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#12 of 12 Old 01-17-2007, 12:15 AM
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My daughter is 9, so we told her right away. I couldn't NOT tell her something as exciting and important as this because she is a part of the family. She was shocked, but happy.

: Mom to a wonderful teen girl, a happy little boy and a cute baby girl
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