Preteens and movies... would you let your 13yo see this? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 03:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1Gbu...eature=related

My 13 yo is currently really really angry at me that I won't let her see this.

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#2 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 04:06 PM
 
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My 14yr old (just turned) daughter wants to take me to see this with her on my Birthday weekend.. Nice way for her to suggest somethign for me and her?LOL
She's read most of the books at school, as well as her friends and really likes the stories.
She's told me a lot about them but I still have yet to read the books myself.

I've always loved vampire/monster type of movies and stories when growing up, and still do today. She seems to have followed me in that.

I don't know if I'll be out of the norm here, but I think I'm going to take her to see it and will be bringing my 12yr old daughter along as well..
My 12yr old daughter isn't into the books but does want to go to watch the movie.
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#3 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 04:26 PM
 
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Yes. I enjoyed the books myself. :
There has been some discussion on the board as to whether the books are good/bad (if the Edward/Bella relationship is healthy and whatnot), but I personally thought it was fine. I *really* appreciated the abstinence element.
have you/she read the books? I would start there.

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#4 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 04:32 PM
 
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They're marketing it heavily to exactly that age group, and the books are technically considered YA. Unless you've got some religious objection, or she's super sensitive to scary stuff, I don't see it as an absolute No. It's rated pg-13. *shrugs*
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#5 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 04:36 PM
 
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I'm not big on "censoring" movies from my kids- except for when they're very small and don't have the judgement to know what might scare them before actually viewing something. By age 10 or so, my kids are pretty good about seeing a trailor and deciding for themselves if they think it would be too scary or not. If I think something is too scary (based on the child's actual sensitivities to movies in the past) I'll discuss it with him or her.

DD2 was about 9 when the 3rd Harry Potter movie came out, and I was concerned she'd be frightened by it (this is a child who was scared by the Elmo movie at age 5) but we discussed it, she'd already read the book, and in the end decided it would be OK if she came to see it along with me and DD1- and she did fine. Another time, more recently, she wanted to see The Golden Compass after seeing the trailors- so we got the book out of the library, we both read it, and she decided not to see the movie.

What I would do is see the movie with her and then you can discuss it together- including anything you felt was "innapropriate" or "unhealthy in the relationship" so she'll be more likely to internalize your values rather than the ones presented in the movie.

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#6 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 06:13 PM
 
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I would let my child see it without second thought.

but when I do object I don't say NO.

I say "Let me(us) see it first and then we will decide. Trailers and ratings can be very decieving. If I have seen it first then we can discuss the parts that we don't agree with or brings up a topic. Or you can have a reason that is more sound. Even if she doesn't like it you have made a better educated decission that both of you will appricate --at least later.
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#7 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 06:18 PM
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I would have let my kid see it at 13 without a second thought, too... OTOH, she read Twilight and proclaimed it "insipid junk" or something like that... she's currently reading Lovecraft...

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#8 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 06:19 PM
 
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I wouldn't have hesitated to let my daughter see this. She is 19 now, and has been counting down the days.
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#9 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 06:42 PM
 
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I read the books, and I hope you reconsider and let your teen watch it. The books are THAT good, and I'd be really really upset and disappointed if I couldn't watch this film, and I am an adult!

* There is no sex, there is no nudity, there are only a few kisses.
* You never watch anyone being killed. It is implied on couple of occasions, but that's it.
* The final fight you see at the end doesn't get much more gruesome that what you see in the previews. The good guys win. (yey for the good guys!)
*The vampires don't even have sharpened teeth! They only have funky super powers, one can read minds, another one can calm down upset people, another one can see variations of a future, etc. Nothing violent.
* The main group of vampires does NOT drink people's blood, they are vegetarians. heh

So...... It's really just a love story. I'd let your daughter enjoy it.

We were very cautious with dsd growing up and ratings, but I'm not expecting this movie to be "too much" for any 13 y.o.


P.S DSD, my sister, DP and I are all going this Friday!

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#10 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 06:53 PM
 
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Absolutely. I've read the whole series and there's nothing in any of them that I would worry about a 13yo seeing. Probably the only scary moment in all of the books is in the last book (the movie is from the first one). By the time the 4th comes out though, she'll be older.

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#11 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 07:16 PM
 
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Definitely. I'm surprised my 14 yo DS isn't talking about this movie. It's right up his alley.

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#12 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 07:46 PM
 
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I'd have let ds1 watch it at 13. I don't watch movies to vet them for him, because he mentioned watching several horror movies at a friend's house (kid was a total horror movie buff, apparently - how I didn't know that, after knowing him since he was 5, I don't know!). We talked a bit about them, and I realized that ds1 isn't bothered by a lot of the things that bother me. He processes it completely differently. (For example, I still can't watch the whole Aragog sequence in the second Harry Potter movie, and after watching LOTR: Return of the King about 50 times, I've never seen the entire Shelob scene. DS1 loves them both.)

When dd's that age, I think we'll have some major discussions about movies before she watches them. She's very sensitive in a way that ds1 isn't.

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#13 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 08:31 PM
 
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I have read Twilight. I would totally let a 13 year old see it (I think the male love interest is a little controlling in the book - but even that can be food for discussion). You could go with her.

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#14 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 09:07 PM
 
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Can I ask what your objection is? Not being snarky, just curious.

I don't think it would be too scary for a 13 year old. Just wondering if there was a moral objection to something in it, or...?
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#15 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 10:02 PM
 
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Never read the book. A friends dd has been reading those books and apperently there are some topics that might be a bit mature for some 13 yo's. I would suggest watching it first to be honest.

Though, I am interested in see the movie. I love vampires... Won't get into the whole reason why though since this is a family board.

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#16 of 103 Old 11-18-2008, 11:43 PM
 
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My 13 yr old just finished the first book so yeah, she's going to see it this weekend w/some friends.

Amy - mom to Anna-Rebekah 14, Logan 13, Christian 8, Ethan 7 and Adan 07/15/08
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#17 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 01:10 AM
 
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I've read all but the last book and would definately let my 13-year-old see the movie. I *would* start a conversation after the movie though about Bella and Edward's relationship (if it's portrayed as controlling as it is in the books).

Oh, and can I just add that I would MUCH rather be going to see "Twilight" this weekend rather than "High School Musical 3?"

A happy woman
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#18 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 02:49 AM
 
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I would totally let my DD watch it at age 13, but I would let her watch it at a younger age too. I've read the book and am going to see it on Thursday at midnight. LOL

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#19 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 03:14 AM
 
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My 13-yo DS isn't interested ... too girly romance-y for his taste. I've read the books and wouldn't hesitate to take a 12 or 13 yo to the movie. (Although the rule in this house is that you have to read the book first)
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#20 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 03:18 AM
 
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I plan on taking my 10 yr old to this movie. We have both read and discussed the books in great detail.
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#21 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 09:12 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks everyone for your replies.
My concern with the movie is the whole concept of this girl being "prey" throughout the movie. I'm also not a fan of how violent it looks.
Dh has said that he'll go watch it and decide from there.

Thanks again everyone.

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#22 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 09:36 AM
 
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I'm planning to take my just turned 15 year old daughter and a group of her friends from church, ages ranging from 13 - 17.
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#23 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 10:55 AM
 
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Try checking out the movie on one of the family movie review sites: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla:en-USfficial&hs=fen&sa=X&oi=spell&resnum=0&ct=resul t&cd=1&q=family+movie+review&spell=1. They'll offer more specifics about exactly what to expect in regard to violence, horror, sex, drugs etc., so that you can make a better educated choice -- and one that works for *your* family
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#24 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 11:19 AM
 
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I can't WAIT to see this movie. 13yo DD and her girlfriends turned me on to the books. They were great steamy summer reading. DS1 tried reading them, thinking it'd make him a chick magnet, but he just couldn't deal.
I also appreciate the acknowledging of intense passion but staying abstinent.
Now if we want to discuss deplorable media...don't get me started on Gossip Girl, another current obsession of DD and her girlfriends. I seriously limit how much of that she watches.
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#25 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 12:16 PM
 
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We will be taking our 2.5 and 6 year old, so yeah . . . I'd take my teenager.

What do parents hope to accomplish by censoring their kids' viewing?

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#26 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 03:55 PM
 
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I'd let my 13 yo see it. And I'd go with her if I could!

I'd rather go see that than the movies my 10 yo currently wants to see, which are HSM 3 (of course!) and Beverly Hills Chihuahua.

Jessy1019 - I know when I censor my kids' viewing of a movie, I'm usually hoping to accomplish me actually being able to focus on the movie instead of my 4.5 yo! (I know that's not what you meant but that's just what I was thinking.) Will your 2.5 yo sit through a movie like this? My 4.5 yo sure wouldn't.
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#27 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 05:36 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessy1019 View Post
We will be taking our 2.5 and 6 year old, so yeah . . . I'd take my teenager.

What do parents hope to accomplish by censoring their kids' viewing?

*avoiding nightmares
*avoiding emotional stress (the kids and mine)
*avoiding desensitising chilkdren to acts of violence

What do parents hope to accomplish by NOT censoring thier kids' viewing?

eta: censoring childrens' viewing as they increase in age becomes more subjective and maybe less necessary, but for small children, limiting their exposure to certain elements seems logical to me.
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#28 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 05:41 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessy1019 View Post
What do parents hope to accomplish by censoring their kids' viewing?
protection from trauma.
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#29 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 05:49 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessy1019 View Post
We will be taking our 2.5 and 6 year old, so yeah . . . I'd take my teenager.

What do parents hope to accomplish by censoring their kids' viewing?
Humorous considering you disallow your children from watching anything that has some one who's adopted a child in it like... Angelina Joile.

I imagine that other parents who censor their children's viewing are doing something similar. Trying to uphold a family standard.

It's lonely being the only XX in a house of XYs.
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#30 of 103 Old 11-19-2008, 05:56 PM
 
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I don't worry much about sexual content or nudity but I do try to limit the violence my child sees. I'm also not a fan of the "one true love/ destined to be together" romantic nonsense that seems to be dripping from this story by the bucket, so I try to limit exposure to that as well. A teen who was basically sensible I might let see it. A small child? No.
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