10 yr. old boys - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 22 Old 11-25-2008, 10:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
gardenmommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: blooming where I'm planted
Posts: 4,223
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
What do your 10 (or close to that age) year old boys do? Mine is not athletic, he doesn't care AT ALL about sports. He likes video games. He likes computers, mostly for their game value. He likes science, but tries not to show it. He is interested in archery. He likes to read some books (things like star wars or animorphs), but not much else.

I would love to interest him in something non-media related, but everything I bring up, he shoots down. He is not interested in "childish" sorts of play, he never has been. People have said to me that he doesn't seem like a "child", he has more of a grown-up manner about him.

We really don't have a lot in common, and I have to work at our relationship (in contrast with his sisters, where the relationship comes very easily). I would love to find something to do with him that would engage his (brilliant, analytical) mind.
gardenmommy is offline  
#2 of 22 Old 11-25-2008, 11:19 PM
 
Cherie2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,735
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by gardenmommy View Post
I would love to interest him in something non-media related, but everything I bring up, he shoots down. .
I guess first I would try asking him if there was something he would like to do with me. Maybe he has some good ideas?

Mom to DD born 1989 DS born 1993 and grandma to
DGS born 2005
Cherie2 is offline  
#3 of 22 Old 11-25-2008, 11:24 PM
 
skreader's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Hong Kong
Posts: 681
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Cards?

Teach him some card games? Gin Rummy? Hearts? Whist? I have only 2 kids and DH doesn't like to play cards w/ us - so we have to plat 3-handed Hearts which is not nearly as good as 4 or more. If you can get a four-some you can have lots of fun.

"21" and various solitaire games are also good - or for the 2 of you to play: cribbage is good.

Poker? Dice games like Yatzhee or Liars Dice?

If he's analytical, does he like chess, checkers, or "Mastermind"? Those are all pretty good games to use the mind.

If he likes archery - what about darts?
skreader is offline  
#4 of 22 Old 11-26-2008, 02:04 AM
 
1growingsprout's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 2,791
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
How about those Soduko games? pencil and book or they have hand-held electronic ones... Would he like to try Karate? Theres more to it than just athletics, some type of woodshop class or painting class??
Is he old enough to volunteer somewhere? animal shelter, retirement home? library, science center etc??
1growingsprout is offline  
#5 of 22 Old 11-26-2008, 09:17 AM
 
lindberg99's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,815
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
What about theater? Dance class? My 8 yo DS went to his sister's jazz dance class and was so into it that he's going to take it next time.

Just wanted to add, what about music? Maybe he'd be into a band instrument or maybe percussion?
lindberg99 is offline  
#6 of 22 Old 11-26-2008, 10:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
gardenmommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: blooming where I'm planted
Posts: 4,223
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by lindberg99 View Post
What about theater? Dance class? My 8 yo DS went to his sister's jazz dance class and was so into it that he's going to take it next time.

Just wanted to add, what about music? Maybe he'd be into a band instrument or maybe percussion?

Ok, I am just laughing to myself with this suggestion! DS would *NEVER* get into dance of any sort! His sisters have taken ballet, and he sees dance as a "girl's thing", although we've explained to him that lots of men are professional (an amateur) dancers. He's not buying it!

OTOH, reading through the responses, I am feeling better about everything, because I can see some areas where we do have a lot of potential for developing some other interests. DH and I have talked about signing DS up for a karate-type of class, as we both think he would enjoy it (as long as DH was doing it with him, that's a whole other thread).

Cards: I never thought about cards. DH and I enjoy playing cards, and DS is probably old enough to start playing with us. We put them away for a long time as we 1) had small children and 2) didn't have enough adults to play with us.

Music: DS likes music, listening to it, that is. He has said he wants to play drums (I'm sure that will be fun to listen to!), so there is an avenue to explore.

He likes chess and checkers, we'll have to break out those games again. I'm not very good, I'm sure he would love to beat me!

Cherie2, I have asked him. He has no idea what he might like to do. It is like asking the chair for ideas, that's how far we get with that line of discussion!

I would love to hear more ideas, and certainly more of what other boys his age are doing. Thanks for the input!
gardenmommy is offline  
#7 of 22 Old 11-26-2008, 10:28 AM
 
PassionateWriter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 3,790
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
my 10 yo is into sports but its more of a physical outlet for him than anything else. he has some physical limitations (not apparent) that will more than likely prevent him from getting really serious about any sport on a high school/college level but he also loves to read about the Red Sox, his fav. team...and anything baseball really.

aside from sports though, he loves making comic books. he does them by hand for now but has shown some interest in doing them on the computer. i have to see if i can find a program for him.

he's been in karate for years (4 i think) and has really benefited alot from that.

he loves playing the drum too.

thats all i can think of right now (but he does love to play games and cards and has for years...whip out those cards again! lol!).
PassionateWriter is offline  
#8 of 22 Old 11-26-2008, 12:12 PM
 
Marsupialmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: St. Louis MO
Posts: 9,500
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I know you said non-media but have you played any of his computer/game system games with him?

We are getting Guitar Hero World Tour for the family............I am getting ready to take my kids on and loose LOL but as a family we will have fun doing it.

I would also look into roll playing games and strategy games like risk.
Marsupialmom is offline  
#9 of 22 Old 11-26-2008, 02:29 PM
 
Roar's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 4,540
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Board games suggestions: Blokus, Mastermind, Stratego, Monopoly, Risk.

Other ideas for activities together: reading comic books together like Halvin and Hobbes, poker, jigsaw puzzles, physical activities that aren't necessarily sports related like frisbee, or shooting baskets. Our son loved Bullseye ball at age 10. It isn't particularly analytical but it is fun. http://www.hasbro.com/games/kid-game...-eye-baseball/
Roar is offline  
#10 of 22 Old 11-26-2008, 03:21 PM
 
swampgreeneyes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Melrose, Fl
Posts: 21
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Aside from family game time, my bf was just like this as a child, and thought you should know his mom tried in much the same way. He's gone on to computer animation as a career now, and is still close to his mother. Don't despair! You attempts to show you care are where it counts, some kids just seem to be wired this way. Good luck and lots of great suggestions to try!
swampgreeneyes is offline  
#11 of 22 Old 11-27-2008, 09:51 AM - Thread Starter
 
gardenmommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: blooming where I'm planted
Posts: 4,223
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by swampgreeneyes View Post
Aside from family game time, my bf was just like this as a child, and thought you should know his mom tried in much the same way. He's gone on to computer animation as a career now, and is still close to his mother. Don't despair! You attempts to show you care are where it counts, some kids just seem to be wired this way. Good luck and lots of great suggestions to try!
Thank you so much for all these ideas! This is fabulous! We have Risk as well as a bunch of other strategy games (DH loves them, me, not so much!), so perhaps we'll break them out this winter.

SGE, thank you for the encouragement. I would love to change my DS into my "ideal", but then he wouldn't be the sweet, wonderful person he is now. He is a great kid, with just a huge amount of potential, and I love him the way he is. DH and I really foresee that DS will be in some sort of computer/engineering type of field when he is older, and although it doesn't really interest me in the slightest, I want him to do what interests HIM.

I should also add that this particular child is not excited about trying anything new, and really has to have a push from DH and me to get involved in new stuff. Once he's given it a good go, he usually loves it, but if he doesn't, then we always allow him to stop. He has been like that since birth, and probably always will be. Our DDs are exactly the opposite: they jump headlong into any- and everything that floats past them.

Mostly, I am just looking for other activities that we can enjoy together without being "plugged in", so to speak. There are some great ideas here, and I intend to try them!
gardenmommy is offline  
#12 of 22 Old 11-28-2008, 01:36 PM
 
D&S Mom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 133
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Darts? Pool? Shuffleboard?
D&S Mom is offline  
#13 of 22 Old 11-28-2008, 03:37 PM
 
amnesiac's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: at the end of the longest line
Posts: 4,984
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
If you're looking for something to get out & about, this is something really cool we did with our boys:
http://www.atlasquest.com/
http://www.letterboxing.org/

We found several first to get the hang of the different ways people do them & then we placed some of our own. Some are really cool to try to figure out & it's a fun thing to do as a family. When we placed ours the kids really got a kick out of going to check on them to see how many people were able to figure out their clues & what sort of nice comments were left for them. Mine also think it's fun to look them up when they go like to grandma's or something.
amnesiac is offline  
#14 of 22 Old 11-28-2008, 06:20 PM
 
Mirzam's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Outside the hive mind
Posts: 7,302
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
I doubt this would be much help, as my 8 (almost 9) yo is a soccer nut , but he is exceptionally good (more than holds his own with 11 and 12 year olds -- last practice he got an 11 or 12 yo boy mad because he was going too hard against him!). Other than soccer and tennis (his other sports love), he is totally into Lego, the harder the better, any thing with less than 500 pieces and he isn't interested. He enjoys math and science and participates in an after school math and science club at school. He too enjoys board games -- he is getting a Lego chess set from Christmas that will satisfy both his Lego passion and his enjoyment of Chess, he is also learning Go at his Math Club which is a fantastic game of strategy. He is happy to play card games too. Apart from these things, he will occasionally pick up a book and he certainly enjoys riding his bike. My 11 yo DD loves her Rip Stick, if that is of any interest to your DS. The other activity you might consider is rock climbing. My ds doesn't do it, but his sister does and she just loves it.

Rainbow.giftstillheart.gifsmile.gif

 

"If you find from your own experience that something is a fact and it contradicts what some authority has written down, then you must abandon the authority and base your reasoning on your own findings"~ Leonardo da Vinci

Mirzam is online now  
#15 of 22 Old 12-08-2008, 08:38 AM
 
zjandosmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 939
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
my 10 yr old ds is not much into sports at all either but he has discovered climbing. We have an indoor climbing gym near us with a GREAT instructor. He started taking lessons almost 2 yrs ago and loves it. His two younger brothers have started climbing as well. my dh really enjoys it too and it has become a great boys bonding thing. My dh has even agreed to take them after dinner to practice if their homework is done. It's always interesting to see who comes home and knocks off hw right away to get in some extra climb time. HTH.

momma to 4!
zjandosmom is offline  
#16 of 22 Old 12-09-2008, 09:51 AM - Thread Starter
 
gardenmommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: blooming where I'm planted
Posts: 4,223
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks! I hadn't even thought about climbing. He might enjoy that.
gardenmommy is offline  
#17 of 22 Old 12-16-2008, 01:30 PM
 
SandraS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,958
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
He sounds just like my just-turned-11 year old. Justus loves to build things when he's not playing video games - legos, other things. He also writes and draws.

he's not athletic and doesn't have a plethera of friends - he's my quiet, creative one, and I will encourage that. So he builds and builds and builds!

SANDRA, 41 year old VERY laid-back mama to VERY free range kids Brett (16), Justus (11), Autumn (4), and Ayla (1)... four perfect NCB's! :::
SandraS is offline  
#18 of 22 Old 12-17-2008, 02:20 PM
 
Bay Momma's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: finally out of our FEMA camper
Posts: 26
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Our 11.5 year old son sounds a lot like yours. He's an only child to older parents and has always never given a rip about sports. He'd spend his entire day reading Star Wars or Aragon books and playing on the computer (even educational type games). As long as it didn't mean competition. His father and I wanted a gentle/compassionate child but worry about him physically and emotionally as he gets ragged by other boys. Even though we're homeschoolers we still get "socialized" lol!!! He loves Boy Scouts (although doesn't really care for the camping part). And we have found LOTS of enjoyment in Kung Fu. This true art form is muti-disciplined. Mainly however, it makes one compete against ones-self. I also had to limit computer to 1 hour (maybe 2 depending on behavior) daily. He helps with chores, day to day household activities and co-volunteers with me.
Bay Momma is offline  
#19 of 22 Old 12-18-2008, 10:36 AM - Thread Starter
 
gardenmommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: blooming where I'm planted
Posts: 4,223
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Bay Momma, thank you. That was helpful. I think we will try to get him into some sort of martial arts program next time around. We are in the middle of a long trip just now (homeschooling is wonderful!), so that isn't an option at the moment. He is a great kid, and has always been a "grown up" child, not a "childish" child, iykwim. I have gotten lots of comments on that.
gardenmommy is offline  
#20 of 22 Old 12-18-2008, 01:48 PM
 
mommy68's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 6,599
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cherie2 View Post
I guess first I would try asking him if there was something he would like to do with me. Maybe he has some good ideas?
I agree.

My oldest son is 13 and he loves computer stuff. He is very good at doing a lot of things on the computer now and can sit for hours and design things on the Lego Design website and other sites. He has always been very mature for his age as well. Not really in to toys. He can build awesome things with Lego blocks as well. We play cards with him, board games, he loves to cook with me and we go to museums as often as possible, especially those geared towards science-related stuff. FYI, my son never liked sports either until a couple years ago when I enrolled him in a local community youth basketball team and after the first few weeks he loved it and has continued that love for basketball that he didn't realize he had. And he is definitely not a sportsy type of kid, but whoda known? Had I not enrolled him myself then he never would have tried it and found out he really liked playing. Just a thought. Maybe your son could use a little nudge as far as sports.

Single (divorced), self-employed working, college student MOM to:

 

17 yr old

11 yr old 

 4 yr old

mommy68 is offline  
#21 of 22 Old 12-18-2008, 02:52 PM
 
34me's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 2,473
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Can you come see us? Your son sounds exactly like my 10 yo ds. His brother plays competetive sports and he HATES it. The only thing we have going for us is he met a boy just like him in K and even though they now go to diferrent schools they have maintained the friendship.
34me is offline  
#22 of 22 Old 12-24-2008, 01:00 PM
 
MamaChicken's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 1,327
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My 10 yo DS sounds a lot like yours. The closest he gets to sports is riding his bike around the neighborhood. He is in scouts, and loves most of that.

He and I don't have a lot in common either and I was trying to figure out something for us to do together. One of the assignments for scouts was to prepare a meal for the family. This turned into an ongoing cooking lesson for us. He now LOVES to cook for the family, his specialty is baked goods. He pours through our cookbooks looking for new challeges, and helps me making shopping lists.

Maybe you could take a cooking class together?

Joanna - wife to Mike, mamachicken to Cub(8/98), Kitten (4/07), Dew-man, and Woe-boy(twins, 10/08)
MamaChicken is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off