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#1 of 6 Old 04-22-2009, 04:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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What are some age appropriate chores for a neurotypical 12 year old boy, and a 8 year old girl with pretty severe ADHD/OCD?

Also, what is an appropriate allowance for each, or would it be better to provide a list of optional chores, and assign each one a monetary value (I.E. sweep, $1) or whatever? What would be appropriate for that?

Thanks
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#2 of 6 Old 04-22-2009, 10:46 PM
 
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My 12 year old DS sets the table, clears the table and puts the dishes in the dishwasher, unloads the dishwasher (every 2-3 days), takes out the garbage on garbage nights, and vaccums his room every other week. He is good about all of it but vaccuming.

I follow the $1/year of age rule for allowance. He gets to spend $10 and puts aside $1 for saving and $1 for giving. I also give him money for school lunch, ice cream with his friends, entry into Magic card tournaments. I just totaled it up because he wants a cell phone too and I am spending $200 a month cash. He and I are going to have a conversation about priorities before I agree to a cell phone.

His allowance isn't really tied to his chores. He does them because he lives here. What he needs is a job but there isn't much around here but walking dogs for our neighbors, he is shy about trying to get that going. HTH

Married to the love of my life, mom to DS :
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#3 of 6 Old 04-23-2009, 01:49 PM
 
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Originally Posted by tynme View Post
What are some age appropriate chores for a neurotypical 12 year old boy, and a 8 year old girl with pretty severe ADHD/OCD?

Also, what is an appropriate allowance for each, or would it be better to provide a list of optional chores, and assign each one a monetary value (I.E. sweep, $1) or whatever? What would be appropriate for that?

Thanks
When my kids were 12 & 10 I had a daily list of chores for them to initial they did. Mostly taking out garbage, sweeping, light dusting, youngest got to use the dust buster on the stairs, etc. I didn't expect perfection but definitely effort.

If they went above & beyond that they earned allowance. How much depended on how much they put into it. Taking 1.5 minutes to take out the tiny bathroom garbage can didn't = the same $ as going out back to scoop dog poo for 15 minutes.

Sahm to 2 girls (17 & 15)& Cody (7/09).
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#4 of 6 Old 04-23-2009, 05:21 PM
 
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Originally Posted by tynme View Post
What are some age appropriate chores for a neurotypical 12 year old boy, and a 8 year old girl with pretty severe ADHD/OCD?

Also, what is an appropriate allowance for each, or would it be better to provide a list of optional chores, and assign each one a monetary value (I.E. sweep, $1) or whatever? What would be appropriate for that?

Thanks
well, i don't know exactly. when i was 12 i worked 2 part time jobs, set the table every night, cleared and cleaned the table after, washed dishes after supper, fed our 3 dogs, cleaned my room and was learning to do my own laundry, and cut the grass on a rotation with dad and little bro. Of course there were always other little small odd jobs here and there as needed. I didn't get an allowance, that was what the jobs were for. (they were at the family business and a friends stable, so i was paid cash under the table) I wouldn't have had it any other way. I earned a great deal of pride doing it that way, and a good work ethic.

My dd (age 6) helps feed our farm animals every morning (pigs, chickens, dogs, goats, horse, cow) in return for us buying the feed for her ducks. she has 3 right now, but has ordered 10 more to add to her flock. She plans to raise them and sell them to save money to buy a car when she is bigger. She is 100% responsible for those. any monetary input we give is earned by chores, as she needs things, we find jobs for her to do that are things we know she can handle, and are fair for the amount earned. She and my ds (3) both know that if they want money, they don't come ask "can i have some money?" they ask "can i have a job to earn some money?" and we give them something and they earn it. ds helps put away laundry. Being 3 of course, this takes some time to help him, but it will pay off. Of course when i ask them to help with housework every now and then, it is usually considered just pulling their weight.

Maybe for the younger one, you could let her have some input on what she would like her chores to be. maybe a flexible routine where she picks something different each week. That way you can stick to what she is motivated about at the moment.
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#5 of 6 Old 04-24-2009, 09:30 PM
 
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For a kid with severe ADHD I would set my expectations about two years lower than same-age peers. I would also keep it to one step directions until they show pretty good mastery of that. Then add two step chores.

My 13 y.o. with ADHD is responsible for cleaning his own room (still a battle but it's his room, I require walking ROOM around the bed, no food, no trash). He takes out the trash on Wednesdays WITH me. It's really his job but I want our trash to get taken away and I don't think it's exactly fair that 5 of us pile up trash and make one person do such a nasty job. He helps with general chores like team dish-washing and the yard as needed. Kids take turns walking the dog. My older two kids have an assigned cat litter box. He is also required to go and rotate laundry as needed. He is famous for telling us the clothes in the dryer are still wet, so now dh requires him to bring the "wet" load up. LOL. It only took us like a month to figure out a solution to that one.
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#6 of 6 Old 04-26-2009, 02:18 PM
 
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I would do simple chores like taking out trash, feeding pets, helping fold laundry and put away their own laundry, washing dishes or loading the dishwasher. I don't give allowances to my children for chores. They do chores as a part of our household. They wouldn't get paid to do their housework when they are adults living on their own so I won't pay them. They do get paid when they help out in either of our jobs.

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