I'm not sure if this should be here, or over in the Health Forum:
So, my DS went to the pediatrician for his 9 year physical. According to my DP, he was very cooperative until it was time to have his genitals examined. My DS refused, point blank, to have the doctor examine them.
My DP was in the room at the time, and the doctor didn't press the point. I tried to explain, when they got home, the need to have all areas checked properly, and how the doctor is really the only person, aside form himself, who should be examining them. But, he was having none of it.
On the one hand, I am very proud of DS for sticking to his guns. On the other hand, he won't let me examine it (and I don't think I'd know what to look for anyway), nor will he let my DP (his stepdad) do it, and I am worried that, if something were wrong, DS wouldn't tell us.
Anyone have any thoughts on this?
Why are you worried that he wouldn't tell you if something were wrong? If he's made it clear that he will not allow any examination by anyone else under any circumstances, then I understand your worry... But it sounds like everything is fine and he just doesn't want to be examined.
What was the examination for? Could you find medical books for your son that would explain what the doctor wanted to check? If your son has a clear understanding of what it is the doctor was looking for, then he (your son) should be able to ascertain whether he might actually need that examination.
It's taken me many years to get up the gumption to occasionally tell a doctor to butt out, and I found your son's story very empowering!
I can tell you what the doctor is looking for in general terms.
That both testicles are decended and roughly equal in size, that there is no sign of an inguinal hernia, and if there are any signs of oncoming puberty. I'll bet there are signs of puberty and that it might be time to get him more info about his body.
Is the pedi a man or a woman? Is that relevant to him?
Ped is a man - I think it would be worse with a woman.
I'm just going to take his lead on it - when we discussed it recently, DS said he'd let me know if anything "felt" wrong.