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#91 of 107 Old 08-08-2010, 05:31 PM
 
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The term "crusader" seems to have touched a nerve, so I take it back.

Let me put it another way: I don't think you'll convince the mom.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
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#92 of 107 Old 08-08-2010, 06:10 PM
 
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Originally Posted by EdnaMarie View Post
From this link "For more on this topic, please see Donald P. Tashkin, M.D., "Effects of Marijuana on the Lung and Its Immune Defenses," Secretary's Youth Substance Abuse Prevention Intiative: Resource Papers, March 1997, Center for Substance Abuse Prevention. Pages 33-51 of this address can be found at the website of the Indiana Prevention Resource Center at Indiana University, located at http://www.drugs.indiana.edu/druginfo/tashkin- marijuana.html."

This cited study is out of date and been deleted.

An article much more recent study:
4http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/05/25/AR2006052501729.html

Thanks for the link though. There is a lot of relevant information. I can't help but notice that the article hails from the law school, not the medical school.
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#93 of 107 Old 08-08-2010, 09:01 PM
 
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Originally Posted by EdnaMarie View Post
The term "crusader" seems to have touched a nerve, so I take it back.

Let me put it another way: I don't think you'll convince the mom.
Uh, more like the other side won't convince the mom. If you read back you'll see that she has decided to go with her gut which is not worry at this point because her son is almost 18 and is otherwise a healthy, responsible person.

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#94 of 107 Old 08-08-2010, 11:26 PM
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My DH spent a good many years as a pot head and never finished college because of it. He regrets that and has made every effort to assure our kids don't end up like he did.
I know plenty of college graduates who smoked pot all through college (some even have their master's) and continue to do so. Pot will only stop you from finishing school if pot is more important to you than school. It's all about how you prioritize your life.
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#95 of 107 Old 08-09-2010, 12:03 AM
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Just saw this on Facebook:

"Hey, isn't smoking weed illegal?"

Replies, "Hey, aren't half the songs on your iPod stolen?"
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#96 of 107 Old 08-09-2010, 12:55 AM
 
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Just saw this on Facebook:

"Hey, isn't smoking weed illegal?"

Replies, "Hey, aren't half the songs on your iPod stolen?"
I don't own an iPod, and it's more than half.

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#97 of 107 Old 08-09-2010, 03:13 AM
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Okay, is she posting from Amsterdam? B.C.? Recreational marijuana use is illegal in most of the US, Europe, and Canada.
Maybe she's from Alaska, Colorado, Ohio, Mississippi, New York or one of the other states where it's decriminalized.
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#98 of 107 Old 08-09-2010, 03:36 AM
 
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Originally Posted by imagine21 View Post
From this link "For more on this topic, please see Donald P. Tashkin, M.D., "Effects of Marijuana on the Lung and Its Immune Defenses," Secretary's Youth Substance Abuse Prevention Intiative: Resource Papers, March 1997, Center for Substance Abuse Prevention. Pages 33-51 of this address can be found at the website of the Indiana Prevention Resource Center at Indiana University, located at http://www.drugs.indiana.edu/druginfo/tashkin- marijuana.html."

This cited study is out of date and been deleted.

An article much more recent study:
4http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/05/25/AR2006052501729.html

Thanks for the link though. There is a lot of relevant information. I can't help but notice that the article hails from the law school, not the medical school.
I chose it for its citations, not because of the fact it was affiliated with a university. I think it's a student site.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
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#99 of 107 Old 08-11-2010, 03:05 PM
 
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ok, Ill chime in a bit, first time ive read the thread

lol, man im not sure where to begin so Ill try and keep it short and sweet

Gateway drug is silly, the less than 1% assumption that pot smokers will not become heavy drug addicts, slightly insulting. I mean who are these "potheads"? Some kind of rare, incompetent cookie eating idiots? They are your teachers, neighboors, politicians, laywers, med school students, any one and everyone. Im a pot smoker, Im not an idiot, I know the difference between marijuana and cocaine. Ive known for a long time, as does the rest of the population, so how cannabis would all of the sudden alter my perception so badly that start injecting heroin, because you know, it seems like a reasonable trail to follow after a bong hit, is beyond me. Ive been smoking since I was 15 and I have never ever done any other drugs, no saliva, no shrooms, none of that. All of my friends did heavy drugs, but seeing them go through made me not want to touch it.

Any history lesson will tell you the hilarious story of how marijuana came to be illegal, so yes it is "illegal". What educated, up-to-date person would agree with it being illegal? I would not send my children else where to have a good time, a underage teen wants to drink and "no illegal activity in my house" will send them down the street to learn how to handle alcohol by other teens? You may not want to "encourage" and enable the behaviour, but obviously the people they are with are encouraging it. Hmm, cool friends saying have a toke, mama saying you'll be out on your *** if you bring a dimebag in MY house, where do you think the teen will be heading?

I want my child to know that our house is his haven for sleeping, eating, schoolwork and friends. If they are going to get high and drunk, because they're mini-adults, they're personalities and tendancies are shaped, they will do what their going to do, I want it under my watchful eye so I know where my son is. I feel thats common-sense, of all the things in the world, I will not be alienating my children because the law says the big green plant is bad.

I feel as though most of the anti- marijuana people have NEVER smoked weed, you must know so much about its effects then

Cannabis is simply not for everyone. It is meant to benefit your mindset and life, its a good thing, I think a couple people here need a nice sweet spliff rolled for them, mellow out man haha


and yes, im partial to mj, a glance at my sig will tell you that

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#100 of 107 Old 08-11-2010, 03:18 PM
 
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Maybe she's from Alaska, Colorado, Ohio, Mississippi, New York or one of the other states where it's decriminalized.
Don't forget Massachusetts! It's only a $100 fine if caught with an ounce or less of pot in public.

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#101 of 107 Old 08-11-2010, 04:03 PM
 
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Don't forget Massachusetts! It's only a $100 fine if caught with an ounce or less of pot in public.
1. Federal law does not recognize state law in this regard.
2. Note that I always write "intent to distribute": there is a federal law making this a felony and it is. You do NOT need a lot to get "intent to distribute" if you're smoking regularly.

Finally... to another poster... there are precious few anti-marijuana folks on here. Most of us are just saying, don't let him smoke or possess in your home, let him be honest with you, and be frank with him. I don't think that's anti-pot, that's pro-I-have-a-mortgage-and-a-career-and-can-see-retirement-from-my-couch.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
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#102 of 107 Old 08-13-2010, 12:10 PM
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1. Federal law does not recognize state law in this regard.
2. Note that I always write "intent to distribute": there is a federal law making this a felony and it is. You do NOT need a lot to get "intent to distribute" if you're smoking regularly.

Finally... to another poster... there are precious few anti-marijuana folks on here. Most of us are just saying, don't let him smoke or possess in your home, let him be honest with you, and be frank with him. I don't think that's anti-pot, that's pro-I-have-a-mortgage-and-a-career-and-can-see-retirement-from-my-couch.
ha on a side note as someone living in MA. Federal law may not recognize state law but there are no feds in this state busting people for having a smoke stash so your point there is rather silly. Further the law in MA states that possession less than 1 ounce is subject to a ticket and confiscation. Intent to distribute only applies if you have evidence of such, pot divided up into baggies, excess cash etc... So you DO need A LOT (an ounce of MJ is quite a lot for anyone to have at one time)...I mean I have seen an ounce at once it is a large bag. Stop trying to scare people...

Further for anyone living in the New England area this might amuse you. Apparently here on Cape Cod many of the people who have been ticketed for MJ possession have simply not paid the $100 fine. Apparently when the law was written there was no provision for how the fine was going to be collected, sooooo because of that if you don't pay your fine literally NOTHING happens. The court refuses to issue a bench warrant because they do not collect the fine the state does and the state has no recourse because they did not state in the law that you HAVE to pay the fine

I find it hilarious personally

On another note. I am glad the OP has taken a more mild approach than some have stated they would here. Your son sounds like a good kid who is taking care of himself.
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#103 of 107 Old 08-13-2010, 02:43 PM
 
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Just saw this on Facebook:

"Hey, isn't smoking weed illegal?"

Replies, "Hey, aren't half the songs on your iPod stolen?"
I love it.

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#104 of 107 Old 08-13-2010, 02:46 PM
 
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ha on a side note as someone living in MA. Federal law may not recognize state law but there are no feds in this state busting people for having a smoke stash so your point there is rather silly. Further the law in MA states that possession less than 1 ounce is subject to a ticket and confiscation. Intent to distribute only applies if you have evidence of such, pot divided up into baggies, excess cash etc... So you DO need A LOT (an ounce of MJ is quite a lot for anyone to have at one time)...I mean I have seen an ounce at once it is a large bag. Stop trying to scare people...

Further for anyone living in the New England area this might amuse you. Apparently here on Cape Cod many of the people who have been ticketed for MJ possession have simply not paid the $100 fine. Apparently when the law was written there was no provision for how the fine was going to be collected, sooooo because of that if you don't pay your fine literally NOTHING happens. The court refuses to issue a bench warrant because they do not collect the fine the state does and the state has no recourse because they did not state in the law that you HAVE to pay the fine

I find it hilarious personally

On another note. I am glad the OP has taken a more mild approach than some have stated they would here. Your son sounds like a good kid who is taking care of himself.
Wow, I hope that doesn't show up on your credit report. A lot of times they don't send collections but it stays on your credit record.

And don't take that to mean, I think that's a good idea. It's just a fact of life.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
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#105 of 107 Old 08-13-2010, 09:46 PM
 
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I want my child to know that our house is his haven for sleeping, eating, schoolwork and friends. If they are going to get high and drunk, because they're mini-adults, they're personalities and tendancies are shaped, they will do what their going to do, I want it under my watchful eye so I know where my son is. I feel thats common-sense, of all the things in the world, I will not be alienating my children because the law says the big green plant is bad.
I agree with this soooo much. It really bothers me that I can be charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor for allowing my child to drink under my supervision. I don't want them to drink, but if they are, I want to be there to keep them safe and to teach them to gauge the impact it has on them and how to manage that. Same with marijuana. I would so much rather have them take a toke, turn up some tunes and giggle all night then get drunk and feel sick in the morning.

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#106 of 107 Old 08-13-2010, 10:47 PM
 
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I agree with this soooo much. It really bothers me that I can be charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor for allowing my child to drink under my supervision. I don't want them to drink, but if they are, I want to be there to keep them safe and to teach them to gauge the impact it has on them and how to manage that. Same with marijuana. I would so much rather have them take a toke, turn up some tunes and giggle all night then get drunk and feel sick in the morning.
The alcohol side of things is one reason I do like Canadian law, one the age to drink is lower so you don't have to run around hiding it until you're 21 (which is just insane to me, who is supposed to monitor drinking habits if it's only legal once you're an adult an you parents have no recourse?). Two it's not illegal for teens to drink alcohol if their parents are there, fully aware, and are giving it too them. Which means when DD gets interested in it, we can make sure her most important experiences are in the presence of responsible adults who understand that binge drinking is not the way to do things.

Yeah we plan on handling pot the same way. She knows we won't be judging her when she get curious and wants to try it.

Is it a popular opinion? No, the most common reason given for why this approach is bad is because as a parent you are responsible for the safety and well being of your child. But that is the same reason I give, and this way I have a greater amount of say in what happens.

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#107 of 107 Old 08-19-2010, 02:48 PM
 
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I think it's important to evaluate WHY your child is doing it and how often they're doing it. I started smoking pot when I was 15, but it was definitely because I was depressed and wanted to feel good. I'd do it maybe 3-4 times a week, and my mother had many talks with me about it how she didn't agree with it, my grades were slipping, etc etc. I quit at the end of my sophomore year because I just wanted my grades to be better so I could get into a good college.

I started up again in college, but only recreationally. Maybe on the weekends every once in a while.

Now, as an adult, I smoke maybe 3 times a week, mostly on the weekends. When I had a job I couldn't smoke during the week or on school nights because it just wasn't something I wanted to do and I felt like it carried over until the next day. I find myself smoking more now that I'm out of a job, and I'm curious if maybe I should just up my anti-depression meds instead. I'm unhappy in general, and can tell I'm self-medicating, but I'm also into more natural methods of medicine nowadays, so I'm trying to figure out what I need to do.

I would say it's worth a talk. Ask them if they're happy in general. If there's some/any hesitation or they say "most of the time," I'd really pause and discuss my concerns for their mental health and happiness. If they really do seem happy and this is a weekend thing, I'd still discuss my concern of it turning into something else and it being illegal, and voice that I'll always be there for them but that it can't be brought into my house.

I think it's possible to be caring and have strict guidelines at the same time. It is a really tough issue, and something I think about a lot when it comes to my future parenting.
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