Help! My dd is turning 11 and has horrible personal hygiene. Won't brush teeth, wipe after urinating, use soap on body, shampoo on hair, wears dirty clothes, etc. Sometimes it's better than others, but I'm at my wits end!
We've talked nicely, had her change clothes, sent her back into the shower, had her take a shower when she smells of urine, used disclosing tablets on teeth, etc. She's really getting too old for this! She's shaving her underarms, but doesn't see the importance of being clean? Why should I pay for braces when her teeth are going to rot out from lack of brushing?
No, there's been no sexual abuse. She's ADHD, stubborn beyond belief, and also has behavioral issues which we've been working on since birth. I really feel like this is a control issue for her.
I'm tempted to have her research the importance of good hygiene, write a paper on it, and leave the matter in her hands. Sooner or later she'll get the hint when people avoid her because she smells, right? But being labeled the smelly kid can stick, and the poor monkey has enough on her plate already.
Other thoughts are to simply not take her out of the house unless she's presentable. We homeschool, so going out tends to be fun lessons, field trips,friends, and other stuff she'd rather not miss out on. But I think she'd just try to not get caught. And how could I reasonably enforce this? She tends to lie when she doesn't do what she's supposed to, and hopes she doesn't get caught.
Ideas? I'd really like to get this taken care of before she starts menstruating!