Join Date: Nov 2009
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Andrea , wife to K , mother to
I only have on child and we will probably only have two (although I'd like three... sigh... ) but I just wanted to say that I do NOT think older siblings helping the younger ones is bad. It makes perfect sense. A family unit would help each other and work together for the best outcome and to meet goals. Now, there would be an issue if say, there was no option but to act as the parent instead of the parent (including 'not being allowed' to move out at 18) but older siblings helping with younger, especially when its something they are happy to do (even if they get frustrated just like the parents do too from time to time haha) is just what a family is to me. When you love people, why wouldn't you want to care for them and help out any way you can?
You know that's a lovely, idealistic attitude. The fact is, some teens are going to resent having to bear lots of responsibilities and taking on a caretaker role, even if they love their younger siblings.
My sister (oldest of 5) has never had children. She swore that she changed enough diapers before she was 13 to last her a lifetime. I know she loves us all, she's generous and enjoys the company of her extended family, nieces and nephews. Maybe she would have preferred childlessness even if she was an only child or from a smaller family - it's impossible to know. What I do know, is that assuming a caretaking role did have a lasting effect on her.
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