Threats from pre-teens - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 3 Old 03-01-2011, 12:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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my dd is 9, almost 10 years old. This morning she got upset about something and accused me of accusing her of something. She then proceeded to inform me that if this doesn't stop that she will no longer want to live with me. Before leaving for school she then threatened not to come home. The only problem is - and I repeated it over and over to her - is that I have NO IDEA what she's talking about.

 

Any ideas what to do here? She'll toss out accusations like this occasionally, but they usually have a proper background - like me cutting her off while she's talking. She's not the kind to lose her temper or get all passive-aggressive on me. She'll let me know when something's bothering her, but this is totally new. I don't know how to deal with an unfounded accusation followed with such a draconian threat. She is under a lot of pressure in school and therefore at home this year. I know she's tired and ready for a vacation - I've said this to her directly. Might that be the reason for the short fuse so early in the morning? Oh, and she on a local girl's soccer team to blow off steam as well. I'm at a total loss. This is not my huggy, smiley little girl!


hide.gif Me 41, single mom to modifiedartist.gifdd 4/2001 and demon.gif ds 7/17/2010

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#2 of 3 Old 03-01-2011, 11:48 AM
 
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Any chance she has actually dreamed you've done something?

 

Especially if she is having a lot of anxiety, I would wonder about that.  I know that both while I was engaged and then pregnant I had dreams that I totally 100% believed were real.  Here is a Hyperbole and a Half entry on it:

 

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/01/theres-lesson-in-here-somewhere-i-think.html

 

 


 

 

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#3 of 3 Old 03-01-2011, 01:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, it turned out that she meant an incident from a few days back that I had practically forgot. No matter what it was, it's the fact that she's making these threats that's bugging me. When she came home from school today I wasn't home from the pharmacy yet. She was hysterical. She had tried calling me on my cell phone to apologize on her way home, but my phone was off. And then I wasn#t there when she got home. She thought I had taken her threats seriously and wasn't coming back. She was crying pretty hard when I got home. So after I got her calmed down and fed, we talked about what went on that morning. I told her (again for the 100th time) that if she's upset about something that she needs to tell me. I can't help her if she won't tell me what's wrong. And then I took a moment to tell her that these threats are not a solution to problems. Somehow I doubt that this is a lesson learned, but one that we'll be repeating over and over again until she's 18. *sigh*


hide.gif Me 41, single mom to modifiedartist.gifdd 4/2001 and demon.gif ds 7/17/2010

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