Aging out of MDC? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 77 Old 11-28-2011, 08:59 PM
 
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Well I am 50, have 2 sons 34 and 31 and 4 grandkids, 11, 8, 3, and 5 months!

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#62 of 77 Old 11-29-2011, 08:34 AM
 
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Age........wisdom........isn't there a correlation here somewhere ...?


Not so sure in my case. But I am certainly more laid back about parenting these days. I really have learned not to worry too much about things. I have watched my eldest go through a somewhat wild teenage and come through it to become an amazing, responsible young lady. She actually listens to me and takes my advice now! I also love her advice to her 14 year old sister about school: "Don't worry about being in the "popular group" (DD #1 spent a lot of time and energy on this pursuit), keep your head down and work hard (two things DD didn't feel she needed to do in school).

 

So far my younger two are proving to be "easier", but my luck could change. 

 


Rainbow.giftstillheart.gifsmile.gif

 

"If you find from your own experience that something is a fact and it contradicts what some authority has written down, then you must abandon the authority and base your reasoning on your own findings"~ Leonardo da Vinci

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#63 of 77 Old 11-29-2011, 08:48 AM
 
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Not so sure in my case. But I am certainly more laid back about parenting these days. I really have learned not to worry too much about things. I have watched my eldest go through a somewhat wild teenage and come through it to become an amazing, responsible young lady. She actually listens to me and takes my advice now! I also love her advice to her 14 year old sister about school: "Don't worry about being in the "popular group" (DD #1 spent a lot of time and energy on this pursuit), keep your head down and work hard (two things DD didn't feel she needed to do in school).

 

So far my younger two are proving to be "easier", but my luck could change. 

 


This is the type of experience/post that I value so much from this forum.  I like your older dd's advice!

 

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#64 of 77 Old 11-29-2011, 09:44 AM
 
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This is the type of experience/post that I value so much from this forum.  I like your older dd's advice!

 



On a roll here!  ROTFLMAO.gifI guess having seen one child "safely" through to adulthood, my best advice is to love them unconditionally. Just love them the way they are in the moment. Don't take their actions personally, they have their own path to walk and they are doing the best they can with what they have. Work on yourself not them.


Rainbow.giftstillheart.gifsmile.gif

 

"If you find from your own experience that something is a fact and it contradicts what some authority has written down, then you must abandon the authority and base your reasoning on your own findings"~ Leonardo da Vinci

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#65 of 77 Old 11-29-2011, 01:11 PM
 
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Is there a linky to the new group?

 

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#66 of 77 Old 11-29-2011, 05:09 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Mirzam View Post



On a roll here!  ROTFLMAO.gifI guess having seen one child "safely" through to adulthood, my best advice is to love them unconditionally. Just love them the way they are in the moment. Don't take their actions personally, they have their own path to walk and they are doing the best they can with what they have. Work on yourself not them.



OK, I'm going to pick your brain here, lol!  I wonder a lot about what exactly makes a lasting impression?  We have big talks, and little talks, about many issues.  Our conversations are open, dh and I are pretty open, we parent well together, so I think we have some harmony going on.  The little moments, such as the rides to school in the car where I hear the big issues of the week, are exquisitely precious to me.  There are a few arguments, limit setting, some pushing of boundaries that we seem to get through OK.  I think we're doing OK with a good deal of love and everyone clearly on a learning curve!  We're all seeming to be connected and happy, which is good.

 

But what do you hear about from your child who has reached adult hood?  What mattered?  Was your advice welcome, or was it the listening ear that offered no advice?  What kept the connection strong?  I know...so many questions, but these are some of the things I think about when the day is done.  

 

 

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#67 of 77 Old 11-29-2011, 05:40 PM
 
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Is there a linky to the new group?

 



The new group is still in the works - will post a link here when it is open.


Rhu - mother,grandmother,daughter,sister,friend-foster,adoptive,and biological;not necessarily in that order. Some of it's magic, some of it's tragic, but I had a good life all the way (Jimmy Buffet)

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#68 of 77 Old 11-30-2011, 04:56 AM
 
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Sorry, forgot to start this with quote from Karne's post #66 and didn't know how to insert during edit:

 

"OK, I'm going to pick your brain here, lol!  I wonder a lot about what exactly makes a lasting impression?  We have big talks, and little talks, about many issues.  Our conversations are open, dh and I are pretty open, we parent well together, so I think we have some harmony going on.  The little moments, such as the rides to school in the car where I hear the big issues of the week, are exquisitely precious to me.  There are a few arguments, limit setting, some pushing of boundaries that we seem to get through OK.  I think we're doing OK with a good deal of love and everyone clearly on a learning curve!  We're all seeming to be connected and happy, which is good.

 

But what do you hear about from your child who has reached adult hood?  What mattered?  Was your advice welcome, or was it the listening ear that offered no advice?  What kept the connection strong?  I know...so many questions, but these are some of the things I think about when the day is done"

 

 

 

DS2 is 18 now, but said something to me once at around 16 (?), which may be old enough maybe not.  But he had a small container pet when he was younger, and was very attached for the five years the animal lived.  When it died, DS2 (age 9 at the time) was a train wreck, missed school that day, cried for days after.  It was absolutely brutal, and all the rest of us could do was ride it out with him.  Fast forward to years later, one day we're talking about general parent-child things, and he told me "I trust you guys because you told me the truth about name-of-animal."


Empty-nesting SAHM to DS1 (1989), DS2 (1992), an underachieving Bernese Mountain Dog (2006-2014), and an overachieving mother (1930).  Married to DH since 1986.
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#69 of 77 Old 11-30-2011, 07:14 PM
 
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Sorry for the impatience regarding the link, I'm just ready for it! 


WRT to Karne, I also think about those things.  I think that we are doing a decent job with our crew.  I'm sure we can improve, who can't?  Thanks for posting your words of wisdom, Mizram.  Very encouraging.  

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#70 of 77 Old 11-30-2011, 07:15 PM
 
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The new group  is open.

 

http://www.mothering.com/community/groups/show/19/old-mamas

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#71 of 77 Old 11-30-2011, 08:48 PM
 
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I am excited about the new group, but too tired tonight to start much of a conversation there. Be back soon!


Rhu - mother,grandmother,daughter,sister,friend-foster,adoptive,and biological;not necessarily in that order. Some of it's magic, some of it's tragic, but I had a good life all the way (Jimmy Buffet)

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#72 of 77 Old 12-01-2011, 12:45 PM
 
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Do you have to join the group to post to threads and start new threads?

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#73 of 77 Old 12-03-2011, 01:23 PM
 
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I have joined the group. Yes you have to join to post threads.

 I hope to see more of you mamas there!

Thanks Mamarhu for starting it!

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#74 of 77 Old 12-04-2011, 11:53 AM
 
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The new group is started, but Cynthia Mosher says we need a co-leader. Come on, anyone?


Rhu - mother,grandmother,daughter,sister,friend-foster,adoptive,and biological;not necessarily in that order. Some of it's magic, some of it's tragic, but I had a good life all the way (Jimmy Buffet)

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#75 of 77 Old 12-04-2011, 11:56 AM
 
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I'll do it. I'm on here most every night, and I'm old. What else do I need?

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#76 of 77 Old 12-04-2011, 04:40 PM
 
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Thanks Buzzer Beater!

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#77 of 77 Old 12-25-2011, 10:12 PM
 
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OH man, I ahvent been on ehre in a long time but MDC started with me when 11 yeaars ago! I was super active and it influenced my decisions to not vax, homeschool and home birth...all things I would have never considered before! I have been feeling very isolated these past few years and am going to try and find a place where I can have a sense of community....otherwise I havent been on here in ages....

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