10 yr old daughter smearing poop on the toilet - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 02-22-2012, 06:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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This is new. And DISGUSTING. I've deduced that it's her because I smelled her hand. DH and I are sickened. He cleaned it up before we realized who had done it, but my plan was to have her clean the toilet.

 

Any idea WHY she'd be doing this?? She denied it, but she was the last one in there and her hands stunk. Circumstantial evidence, yes, but I think it's good enough to call it in this case. :p

 

Any other suggestions besides having her clean the toilet?


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#2 of 7 Old 02-22-2012, 09:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HarperRose View Post

Any other suggestions besides having her clean the toilet?



I think that would be the best/most logical consequence.  If it became a recurring event, you might need something more.  But, wow, that is gross. . . I can't imagine why a 10 yr old would do that.

 

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#3 of 7 Old 02-22-2012, 11:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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She's on bathroom duty for a while. :p

 

I don't get it, either. It's so .... wow.
 

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I think that would be the best/most logical consequence.  If it became a recurring event, you might need something more.  But, wow, that is gross. . . I can't imagine why a 10 yr old would do that.

 

Amy



 


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#4 of 7 Old 02-24-2012, 07:32 AM
 
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I have only seen this type of behavior - in older children - who have developmental and/or behavioral disorders, such as autism, severe ADHD, ODD, etc. 

 

Additionally, if it is not linked to a developmental/behavior disorder, it is often viewed as a potential indicator of sexual abuse.  

 

Talk to her in a very non-threatening, non-judgmental, calm and cool manner and see if she will give you any insight into why she did it.   

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#5 of 7 Old 02-25-2012, 12:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, she does have ADHD/anxiety and is very borderline on the autism spectrum. I did consider those factors, as well as the abuse one you mentioned. Frankly, that alarms me. But we are also in the middle of a movw, too, so I'm thinking that could also play a part.

 

We will be talking a lot over the next several days to address this.

 


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#6 of 7 Old 03-09-2012, 06:25 AM
 
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There was a mysterious 9-11 year old boy pooping on the floor at my DD's school when she was in 5th grade, every day for a few weeks. Eventually, the teachers figured out who it was after the boy left the school and it stopped happening. The boy was having serious behavioral issues at school, hence leaving and going to a stricter school (this school was very lax in the discipline area, no grades, etc) and his parents were in the middle of a divorce. It seems like this type of behavior is a cry for help. I wouldn't punish a child for this sort of behavior, since it's clearly indicative of some sort of distress. It seems like she feels powerless, and the only thing she feels like she can control is her elimination behavior. A move could definitely be traumatic enough to bring some serious behaviors to the surface (if you're our family, it takes a solid 6 weeks to complete the process, which is enough to make anyone a little nutty), but it seems to me that it was something latent that is coming out now, some deeper issue that is probably subconscious. I have also seen this type of thing happen with younger children who were potty trained too early or had some kind of potty training trauma. I myself was forced to potty train too early which left me with a desire to wear diapers until I was 8 or 9, until I could rationalize what was going on subconsciously. DD 14's step sister is 9 months younger, and her mother tried to potty train her around the same time DD was being potty trained and subsequently continued to wet herself for years.


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#7 of 7 Old 03-09-2012, 02:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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She has stopped doing it. I'm thinking it must have been move related. We were in a bad area, in a less-than-stellar school, with ok kids, but the area really had an impact on all of them. We've been here about 3 weeks now and it hasn't happened at all.

 

I think it was related to everything going on in her environment. She never did manage to clarify it for me, but we still communicate, of course.


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